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I work with a guy who has threatened me physically. What should I do?
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I work with a guy who has threatened me physically. What should I do?

...I won't go into the details about why he's so upset with me, but first he got physically aggressive and then he said, "I know a lot of people. You could get hurt." The whole day yesterday he gave me these looks like he wanted to kill me. I'm worried for my family's safety. Can I get a restraining order without just pissing him off more? I'm not sure it's the right route to go. I'm hoping that I can just ignore the situation and let it go away. I've sent him a message stating that I would like him to restrict his interactions with me to strictly professional business matters or I may have to pursue legal action (i.e. protection). Does anybody have any advice here? I just don't want to tangle with this guy. I wish I never even talked to him...

Thanks, everybody. I'm really worried here. I feel like I can't talk to anybody because, I don't know, I guess I'm just ashamed that I feel this way. Sorry.


You need to tell your HR rep, then the police.

file a repoprt

For your work... first step - your supervisor. If that doesn't work - Human Resources.

For your home/family... call the police and explain. They'll be able to tell you what they can do for you.

First, talk to the boss. Tell him that this situation is unacceptable and you expect him to take action. They can't fire you for this.

Then file a report with the police ASAP! If he continues to threaten you, get a restraining order.

In the meantime, be smart! If he makes threats in any manner, record them. Print emails, save text messages, make notes in a notebook. If you can have someone else you trust see them. Don't park in an isolated place anywhere! Always check your car before you get in. Look inside and outside. Keep your doors locked when you are in the car. Consider purchasing a personal alarm. You can get them at places like Radio Shack. They are small enough to fit on your key chain and emit a loud signal when activated. Don't wait until you are at your car or door to dig for your keys; have them in your hand ready to use.

Make sure your windows are either locked or fixed so they cannot open enough for someone to get in. Do your doors have deadbolts?

The upside is in most (but not all) cases, these guys are just bullies and emit a lot of smoke. Just don't take this lightly, take action. Talk to the boss ASAP and the police. And YOU HAVE NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED ABOUT!

Tell your supervisor and human resources, and maybe the police as well about his threats. You can't just ignore his threats and let him walk all over you.

q answers
tell everyone at work and tell the police too, he'll never try anything because he'd get in trouble. if you do nothing he'll do it more

First speak to your supervisor, and if that does not work then "Man Up"

why do you feel ashamed. Did you instigate this behaviour. If you think you did then perhaps an apology would help, if you didn't then this is bullying in the workplace and cannot continue.
Maybe you should be talking this through with your line manager if he can be trusted to not go in with size 20 boots. Alternatively a union rep or some one like that may be your first stop. Then solicitors letter and then the police. It is also important to keep some sort of record of his threats whether physical, verbal or visual. Otherwise it is just someone moaning aboout a collegue - remember he could even use that email aginst you so think hard before you act

Talk to your human resources office at your work. Most companies have an extremely strict non harrassment policy. If he has threatened you physically you need to report it. Will it piss him off more.. probably. But do you really want to take the chance that he means it and give him the opportunity to carry out the threats?

Try to work out the issues between you. Be humble and don't get in his face.

If that does not work, speak with your supervisor. Inform him about your concerns. I'm sure your supervisor will take care of the problem thereafter.

Good luck.


Well you must have done something tick him off! But yeah you shouldn't have wrote him that letter. Very bad judgement of you to state the "legal action"

just be a regular human being and say sorry to him for whatever you have done or just say sorry and tell him I hope we can resolve this and move on because I really do not want there to be tension between us because what would that solve? It wouldn't be very mature of us.

Say that. And I will bet you a million dollars he will not hurt you. This is because you already said sorry in a mature and pleading manner. So if he thinks of hurting he will have thought "this guy apologized to me and I am still going to hurt him?"

you see.

This will help.


Megain H
what did you do to piss him off? I would get a restraining order. that is the best bet. you should not have to feel threatened at work. good luck.

He'll probaly chill in the next couple days but if he keeps up his crap then go to your boss and file a grievence. Explain the situation, if this guy keeps it up you will have to go back to boss. If it doesn't stop after that then go to police station and ask about filing a PFA protection from abuse order. He should be fired if he keeps it up, but if he doesn't then do as I said and then see about sueing the company for not protecting you from the situation.

Well I would recommend getting the restraining order or getting a gun you could also have a talk with him. Good luck.

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