Should I allow visitation?

Loveable

I don't like the sounds of it either and I don't even know you!!
DON'T do it!
If he (the dad) wants to see his son that bad, he can call you and set something up. If the grandma wants to see him, then she needs to meet your needs. Looking at the dads past I don't see how a court would allow him to have custody due to his history. So if he was really serious he could be using his mom as the bait to get you away from the child.
I would have it as to where she can meet you both for lunch or something on a Saturday, but don't just give in cause she wants to see him. You never know she could be one of those ppl who will "kidnap" someones child just so her family can be with them. It's happened before, and I know with my babies, I would NEVER take the risk cause you never know just what some ppl would do...... I know it sounds crazy, but it happens every day, and it could happen to you. This just seems to out of the blue to be a normal visitation.
Don't ever thing you're untouchable!

Good luck!

Jeanette E

Very difficult situation. It sounds like his mother really wants to see her grandchild.

mikehunt29

I'm a little torn on this one... on the one hand, I think your child should be able to see his father, on the other hand, he sounds like kind of a bum. I think you should issue an ultimatum- IN or OUT... none of this wishy-washy, sometime when you feel like it BS...if he wants to be a part of his child's life, then he needs to do it 100%. He is not a man!

Junior

Hunnie im sure you don't want to hear this but trust me im a father but (I wouldn't act like that) im there for my son but some ppl are just sick and screwed up in their head but i would at least let him see his kid because (im not taking his side) that is tearing him up inside if he wants to admitt it or not and trust me when i left my finance for 3 months casue she kicked me after a huge fight i acted like he was'nt mine and that was the dumbest thing but trust me it tears anyone up inside not to see their own flesh n blood they once made so i would let him see his child but i would also set it up so he can see the child with supervision if you really dont trust him just ser it up that he can only see the child with a gov. official defaqs or you so i hope you make the right choice and i hope this helps hunnie

notadummyrat

The kid needs to see his father. As long as he is not being neglegted or abused over there you should let him.

Troy S

Sounds like dad doesn't care too much. He's had his chances.

Sharon M

Is it possible that his mother is really asking for herself? That's still her grandson and maybe she justs wants to see him. If it were me I would speak to her directly and get to the bottom of it.

Your_Star

you should let him see your son...so it gives your son a chance to get to know his father better.

swishyvt

Is it him or maybe Grandma wants the visit? I wouldn't set up a visit for him unless he contacts you, but maybe a short visit with Grandma would be ok. Trust your instincts.

jessiegirl_pr

I defenetly think that your son should interact with his father; but you have to let the father know that he needs to stop manipulating his mother to get through to you. Demand him to speak to you directly. It is very childish for a grown man to act in such manner, so in order for him to respect you have to be firm. It is very important that you take your role as a mother and dicipline your son, it can get hard for you being that you and the father are not togather, I'm almost sure that his father will not dicipline your son the way you would, he might be more submissive and allow your son to do what ever he wants when he is not in your presence, so you have to teach the father how to respect you too.

Jay-

Robert C

Do your in-laws act responsibly?Your ex. doesn't matter.The child will decide when the time is right to get to know his dad.Do NOT allow anyone to have any custody.Period.If the child wants to see his fathers relatives,drop him off for a few hours.the last thing you need is an unfair custody battle.As I said,let me make it clear,if your in-laws are responsible adults let them see him.His dad can visit there.The child needs stability and love ,not rejection.Base your decisions on his happiness alone.

Thebronx

What is important is the child not your feelings and not his father's feelings. Do what is best for the child.

Dragnet

I would always say OK to a supervised visitation. You need to keep that door open but on your terms if he is being flaky. Go ahead and reconsider as if you say flat out no then he can make a stink in court, so if you say OK but here are the terms. Supervised by you...That's it. I see too many meaning well Mom's that call me to get their child and since the courts feel Dummy Dad's have to interfere they let them.

Tell his Mom that he needs to set it up not her, Now if it is Grandma who wants the visitation you say ma'am you can come over whenever you want but leave sonny at home.

Kaska

If he wants to go Thur his mom regarding this issue. Then I say set it up with his mom as long as everything stays running smoothly.

Also consider she may be asking because she wants to see her grandchild. And not necessarily for her son.

Zelda Hunter

You have a right to know what's going on over there. A call from the grandmother is nice, but it's not enough. Could you invite her over for coffee to discuss it. You are going to need direct contact from your son's father, before you allow your son to go see him, and even then I would insist (possibly get it in writing or in court) that visitation is conditional on the grandmother being present. You can relax the rules in a few years when your son is older. Meanwhile, your son's father i not some kind of long-suffering father missing his son. He hasn't bothered to contact you in 5 weeks. He probably has a drug or alcohol problem or both and is irresponsible. You have no evidence to the contrary.

lil_snipe

A child needs his father in his life. If you keep the father out of his son's life (regardless of his faults), it is going to be problematic. Some time is better than none.

lizziemoffles

some people just never grow up but that doesnt mean they should be punished for it maybe the grandma wants to spend some time with your son or her grandchild so give your son the opportunity to choose if he dont want to go then thats a different story keep them together so he wont have issues later on in life or blame you that you never gave his dad an opportunity to be with him consider all your options and good luck

Wee Bit Naughty

Does the father wish to see his child? If yes, and he is of no threat to the child, then he should be allowed visitation rights. Furthermore, if he is paying child support, I do believe that you cannot legally deny him that right. Of course, there is the matter of him being an ex-con, so I'm not sure how that plays into the visitation rights scenario.

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