19, living at home and ready to move out!?

I am 19 years old and growing fed up with my parents rules! I have a 22 year old sister living at home with me too and I don’t feel like my parents are fair with me. They let her do so much more than they let me do. My sister tells me it’s because I have a boyfriend and she does not. So just because she’s single she can whatever she want! The other night she went out and got home at around 3, last night I went out and got scolded for getting home at almost 1:30, and that was pushing it, I was supposed to be home at 12:30. So about a month ago my boyfriend and I decided to start saving up so we can move out. I realize that it takes more than just to want to move out; I know I need a steady job and a lot more! But I think am ready, I know I want this and I know we can make it work. Of course if I move out I need to be sure I am not going got want to come back home! One major thing stopping me is my family, what will my grandmother say? My cousins? But most of all what will my parents say? Should I care what they think or just live life for me and not anyone else?

snrednop

If you feel you're ready and have enough money, then go for it. Just remember that you will be taking on a lot of new responsibilites and it can become overwhelming. Your parents will respect you in the end if you show you can handle it, and you will gain more self-confidence and adult experience. Also, it takes about a thousand dollars (or more depending what part of the country you live in) to move into a new place...security deposits, utlity hookups, first months rent, etc.
Listen to your family's advice, but take it with a grain of salt.
If I were you, I would not move in with the boyfriend. You can get into relationship/money problems and what if you break up? Where would you go when you have a lease for 6 months or a year? You don't want to end up right back home where you started and having your family tell you "I told you so."

Jery E

you sound about as ready to move out as any 14yr old girl with no job and no plans.

Lilmama

I understand you do not like the way you feel your parents are treating you over your sister but she is older than you and that maybe why she has a little more freedom. It may have nothing to do with her being single and you not but more to do about age and trust. Before you decided to move out, rather on your own or with your boyfriend, you need to make sure you are ready. Going by the concerns you have with your family leads me to believe you are not ready to move out you just want to be able to do as you please. It takes more than saving to be able to move out on your own. When you live on your own there are a lot of bills that have to be paid and things could go wrong with the house that are unexpected but you have to fix. What if you and your boyfriend do not work out will you be able to afford the house on your own or will you go to your parents house and the boyfriend stay in the house. Will both of your names be on the lease or mortgage or just his or yours? You can not just move out and think that is the end of rules. How does your boyfriend feel about you coming in at all times of the night? I understand he can not tell you when to come in but it would be inconsiderate on your part to come in late at night if he has to work in the morning. How would you feel if he came in late and you had to be at work the next morning. In your parents house they have a right to make rules but just because you will be out on your own does not mean that you will just be able to come and go and the person you stay with will be able to do the same.

Smiling JW

19 though though legally an adult is also still an age of inexperience. Your attitude to your parents is not showing maturity but you sound like a 14 year old not getting her way and wants to run away.

You will have a lot of time to be responsible. You will soon be spending the rest of your life as an independant adult. Just cool it and show humility and respect to your parents. Then when you move out it is for all the right reasons.

suzwiz3

Don't move in with your boyfriend. You should care what your family thinks. If you move away with your boyfriend, you will end up cooking, doing laundry, cleaning house. Who the hell wants to do that? Do the grown up thing and have a calm talk with your parents. Then when you are ready to move out , do it with a girlfriend and live a little. Your parents care about you. Don't upset your family over this.

Spindrift

You left out the most important factor and that is how are you going to support yourself? Are you working full time? Do you have any idea what apts cost? Have you done any research into living situations? Do you have your own car and pay your own insurance? Are you prepared to pay all your own bills incl rent car insurance utilities, food, clothing?

Officer Dave

Your an adult it's time for you to make adult choices. Why would your family think badly of an adult moving out of her parents house?

paulcondo

go for it

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