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elusive_001
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interesting question... never really thought about it I guess... should have.. I got married to my first husband 1990 and divorced him in 2000... got married in 2001.... and this relationship is going strong... for me at least this one is a better relationship....
my first husband and I were 'children' -immature- in the way we handled things... communication was sorely lacking... and we hurt each more than helped or held each other.... after ten years there was no option but to end things... the trust, friendship was gone...
my first husband got remarried... but he is still full of anger toward me... he tries to argue with me on everything... and has gone as far as to tell me that he and his now second ex-wife both agreed that I am to blame for their failed relationship.... lol... and that 'anger' leaves no room for a good relationship (in my opinion)
my second husband went thru somewhat similar issues and both of us were 'gun-shy' and talked a lot about the issues that come between two people when they are married.. our feelings... how we each felt about past relations... how it could have been made better... basically, the communication is better...
since I can only speak for mine.... and I don't know how it is for others.. so, I went looking for the information... this is what I have found... a site with the stats of marriagedivorce/re-marriage.. only appears to be current to 2005... with some stats listed as being 2002... and 2000...
Median age at first marriage: Males: 26.9
Females: 25.3
Median age at first divorce: Males: 30.5
Females: 29
Median age at second marriage: Males: 34
Females: 32
Median age at second divorce: Males: 39.3
Females: 37
Median duration of first marriages that end in divorce: Males: 7.8 years
Females: 7.9 years
Median duration of second marriages that end in divorce: Males: 7.3 years
Females: 6.8 years
Median number of years people wait to remarry after their first divorce: Males: 3.3 years
Females: 3.1 years
Percentage of married people who reach their 5th, 10th, and 15th anniversaries: 5th: 82%
10th: 65%
15th: 52%
Percentage of married people who reach their 25th, 35th, and 50th anniversaries: 25th: 33%
35th: 20%
50th: 5%
link to site:
http://www.divorcemag.com/statistics/statsUS.shtml
since no one out there is a 'number'.. the only answer I can think of for your question is that I do not know how many... but I know it is possible... 'if' there has been growth, maturity... and the first marriage/feelings of have been resolved...
hope this helps |
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irchriscdk
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With a national divorce rate of over 51%, I would say there has to be some hope for people finding a more satisfying relationship.
On the other hand, if divorce is an option, what is the point of getting married in the first place? Just date and you don't have to worry about long-term commitments. |
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n9wff
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That depends more on the previous relationship.
Most don't realize that how you leave the first one is how you will enter and judge the second. The 'second one" will have a bigger climb and higher expectations.
I should know, I am the "second one" for my wife. But she is happier, since her first one had an affair. |
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Shirley T
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It all depends on if the person realizes their role in the break up of the marriage and works out their own issues and don't take that excess baggage into another relationship. I divorced a looser and remarried and couldn't be happier (for 23 years now) |
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tommy
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dont hear of those situations too much. not lasting anyways. sorry for the dark clouds above me. :) |
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Give it up
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I did. I was young and stupid and got the first one out of the way. At least that's the joke version. My Husband and I now are the in the best relationship either one of us has had. Why? |
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sarah
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I have remarried and I can say that it is very different and positive in many ways. However, we do not live in a perfect world, no one problem free. |
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GREEN OLIVE
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is just a matter of destiny |
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nora d
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sometimes a second marriage is better. you end up more mature and able to see past what failed in your first marriage. Second marriages sometimes are more for financial security because they are bringing kids into it. |
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bcyouletme
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I did. |
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~Mika~
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I divorced Dec 27th 2007. I hope to remarry into a better relationship I have hope. I'm going to counseling to make sure I can treat the next person well although I was mistreated. |
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sarah_smiles
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Here are some statements on the web
twice as many second marriages end in divorce
http://www.realsmart-hypnosis.com/Twice-as-Many-Second-Marriages-End-in-Divorce.html
and
15% of remarriage end in 3 years, 25% in 5 years
http://www.psychpage.com/family/mod_couples_thx/cdc.html |
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Ariel25
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I agree with Kermit about people rushing to get married. I did and now husband and me are not together because of his cheating. |
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Futility Knife
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I think the majority of people get divorced and then make the same mistakes all over again... |
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m g
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It is my 1st and my ex 2nd so I do not know if she picked wrong or I did? But I want to try again with someone else who loves me for me vs financial stability. |
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asif k
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In Germany 40% is the divorce rate. |
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Looney
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probably not many sorry to say ! |
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holly
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That's hard to answer because better is such a general word. Better financially? Better romantically? Better happiness wise?
Most people who divorce from their first spouse know what they want the second time around. They know what they can't deal with, what they can, and they're much wiser about making their decisions the second time around. This doesn't apply to everyone, but for the majority of people this is how it works. |
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craig b
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Well, the divorce rate for 1st marriages is 52%+ and for 2nd marriages, it's 83% !
Why?
Because the people that got the 1st divorce do not have the skills necessary to "do" marraige. They do not know how to do succesful conflict resolution and they generally, push all the blame for everything onto their spouse. They are pretty much self governing not allowing their spouse a voice or a "vote" over issues. They are usually more argumentative because of their pride. They do not "serve' their spouse but only look to be served. They are usually more turned by addictive behaviors because they cannot find the peace and joy within a single partner relationship and are always looking for the better option.
Does this sound like your divorced friends?
Married people that survive all this find comfort, peace, unity, intimacy and long life for their efforts.
Kind of makes you wonder why anyone would give up this for that? They don't know HOW to do it! |
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Nadine
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I'm not sure. My X tried getting back together with me, and I tried, except I saw all these red flags, and thought, What the Hell am I doing????
I love being single and playing the field. I love not being attached to some idiot and having to call him if I have to run to the store, or run an errand.
I hate the control part of being in a relationship....
I hope that divorced couples are happy in a realtionship as long as they don't rush into it!
GOOD LUCK!! |
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WiseGal
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I am praying to have final divorce decree by the end of this month...I have no desires to date again
I was 34 when I married and was married over 10yrs
so....I really thought I had picked a nice responsible
kind caring man...he wound up being insensitive
and abusive and it was NOT easy to leave trust
me I know why women stay....
so I am just enjoying life now... |
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happilyhiswife
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That would be me! I married young.. and my first marriage didn't make it to 2 years.. he ended up cheating on me and we divorced before I was 22. Now a handful of years later, I have married again, and I must say I have met my soulmate. We are so very happy together and we look forward to growing old together and of our olden days sitting out on our front porch in rocking chairs watching the sunset.. |
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2Cute2B4Got
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Not many, most repeat the smae mistakes over and over, just in different relationships. |
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Candace C
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I don't know specific numbers, but I did. My first marriage was not a good one, but my second marriage is still going strong. |
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RotcehZepol
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25 per cent |
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Rob K
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Of all the people I know who have got divorced... only two have married into separate second relationships where they are very happy... |
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Clays mom
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depends on the mentality of the person there are some that dont remarry and then there are some that get married 10 more time |
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Kermit
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Alot, which I sometimes think is stupid, I am 23 with two children by the same man... I want to marry him and I know I will marry him someday but why rush, I want to make sure its the right thing to do at the right time... to many people rush into marriage just to get divorced, my parents got divorced when i was 10 it was the worst thing in the world, yes Ive learned to accept it, but that is no way what I want my children to go through... Just take your time and find the right person... |
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TooDie C
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i would have to guess and say like 40% |
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MMFSKI
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60% is the divorce rate, go figure |
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specialforcesmom
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25%, I would guess. I don't know for sure, but 50% of first marriages end in divorce. So, I'm taking half of that. |
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