Am I being too suspicious?

TNL

well, is all snooping is going to do is make you look for something that is not necessary. It would be hard to tell him why you know. You COULD tell him that he accidentally left the computer logged on to his account on the screen and that you had seen where he had already gotten it. Call him out on it. It could be something big, then again he may just be trying to surprise you with something. OR he may just be being a man and being selfish with the car. Either way he shouldn't have lied to you. Dig deeper into it and find out what's going on. What is the loan for? He may be getting you a present or a new car possibly??

BTW........to your add on.....I WOULD BE PISSED!! He is sneaking behind your back. If you would have told that part to begin with I would have had a completely different answer. If he changed his password then hell yeah he would know that I figured out what it was ESPECIALLY if I was paying for it too! Find out what the hell is going on!

SWEET SARAH

JUST PLAIN ASK HIM WHAT IS GOING ON. ASK HIM TO BE HONEST AND DON'T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER. YOU DESERVE TO KNOW WHAT YOUR HUSBAND IS UP TO. DON'T YOU?

kiki

Ask him straight up, he's your husband he should be honest with you. If he tries to lie tell him you know.

Baby Gurl

Ur best bet is when he needs the car again follow him and see exactly what he is doing just don't let him see u. U need 2 know what is going on b 4 something blows up in ur face. Hey u never know.

Steven D

Confront him and work it out. Otherwise you will be suspicious of him forever. Also, share accounts. That should be ok for a married couple to both know about all of their finances together. That will avoid any future problems. If this cannot be resolved then you need to evaluate whether you can stay with someone you do not trust. I know your situation - I am in a relationship with someone I don't trust, and wonder often if I should have ended it long ago when I first sensed it.

justwonderingwhatever

Always confront a lie. Find out what is really going on. And yea..I think it's ok to have his password without him knowing it! Good job! Keep up to date....If he's not doing anything wrong..whats the harm.

TXVyper

It is possible that he is trying to suprise you with something. I would sit back and see what transpires over the next week or so. My opinion is that you are worrying about nothing. And there may actually be something tha needs to be done at the bank in reference to the loan and the actual file papers need to be signed and put into his file. Also it is a good idea in the near future to let him know that you have access to his account info, you would want to know if he had the same information on yours, right? Honesty is the best policy. Talk to him.

Shadow

Well... Give it sometime... Maybe he's planning something special for you... You don't know... But keep an eye out... Not too obvious though... Just let him use the car... Reset the trip meter...

Whirled Peas

Don't be too suspicious, leave him be, if you notice other strange behaviors ask him about those. Forget about the loan, you invaded his privacy.

xoxo_sexy_******_xoxo

Why don't you let him know that you are aware of the fact that he already received the loan, because you know his password, and to explain himself RIGHT NOW! lol, but seriously. Even though he may be mad about you knowing the password, it's worth seeing what he comes up with if he's really lying. Ugh, I really hope you're just being paranoid, it's the worst feeling in the world being cheated on, and especially when your man completely denies it...good luck to you :(

Michelle G

Do you live in a community property state? Is debt that he racks up your debt too? On the other hand, could he be doing something nice for you?

Bridget Dawn

no i dont think so. i dont usually advise spying but it does sound like hes hiding something.the problem is how to let him knoew that you know he was accepted for the loan without letting him know you were snooping. you could try saying dont you remember telling me you got the loan the other day? he cant really prove he didnt!lol but try to think positive until you know something for sure. i mean, maybe hes out trying to fix up a surprise for you or maybe hes out buying you something special and he wants to surprise you with it.

Shannon

Is there a possibilty that he may be doing something special for you and doesn't want you to know? Just trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.Also is there anything other than this that would trigger any suspicion of odd behaviour. Maybe he will suprise you with another vehicle! Since you only have one you said? Goodluck and I hope this is just pure paranoia for you and your marriage!

Michele K

Sounds like he's up to something. But before you get all bent out of shape...maybe it's something for you. Don't know why he took out a loan - but you never know. Maybe he is buying you a new car...? Since you share one. I would be suspeicious too but wait it out until you know for sure.
Good luck...when you don't trust someone...it's not good. Try and keep a positive outook on things. If you don't see anything good happen aftertoday...then snoop! I know I would.

Shy Girl S

You knew he was lying so therefore, you have every right to check up on him...anyone who says you're invading his privacy needs to have a reality check....your husband (the one guy with whom you should be able to trust) had blatantly lied to you!

Ask yourself how far you'll let him get away with being deceitful and when you know the answer, confront him. It's a marriage for goodness sake...there has to be a reason (not an excuse) as to why he wasn't upfront with you. If I were in your shoes, I'd want to know his reason/s.

CEP

Maybe he's trying to surprise you with something... I mean.. what is the laon for anyways? Maybe he's getting a second car?

If you don't tink this could be the case... then the only thing you can do is talk to him about it!

Pauly

That to me sounds VERY suspicious.

flagger

Yes, you are.
Quit snooping.
No wonder he can't tell you the whole story.

David

Is it possible that both of you are correct? Even though he may technically have the loan, he might have been told that he neded additional paperwork to complete the process or the check would be voided.

classyladyonly

Hmm. I think your being just a little to suspicious. Could be he wants to buy you something on his lunch break! Or has he done something to make you feel this way in the past? Wait for a day or so he will have to fess up about the loan soon. Don't sweat it just yet!

Diana B

Maybe he's just not telling you something to not get embarrased. Some situations are not always making you look good. But then again, you know your husband best. What your gut instinct telling you? do you guys have good comunication? Do you trust him? You should ask him about it. You don't want to start worrying on stuff like that.

wscrapy

In times of cheating,things that are out of character are suspicious.On the other hand,keep in mind that Valentine's Day is right around the corner too, which brings the same sneaky tactics.

Barney R

Chill out for now.
Don't go postal until you are sure.
Guys don't always have the total plan when they begin their day.
Like:I think I need the car for something.

Just some gal

The best thing you can do for a relationship is being open and honest. Even if he's not, you have to at least do what you can. Confront him. Tell him the truth, that you know his password and know he has the loan already. Without truth there is just going to be more drama and complications. Try to make it as simple as possible and get a direct answer from him.
Good luck!

irel

well confront him! who cares if he says u are nosey at least u are not a lier!!! your the wife u have the right to know something! don't be like other women who pretend that they don't see or know nothing! if he lies to u about as stupid as that? what else did he lie about?

diobalikal

But it's ok you have his password with him knowing? Hypocritical much. gotta love relationships based on lies. When you get divorced let me know, I have a bet with a buddy on here about how long you'll last.

donna_honeycutt47

Ok you caught him in a Lie. That surely is a Red Flag. Yes you need to be on your guard now, but it also may be something innocent that he just does not want to share with you right now. I have always felt the best relationships last because of Trust and Communication. If those two things are missing in your relationship, you are gonna have problems..

I think a lot of you are missing the bigger issue. If you do not share the accounts, quit snooping around on his account. I can guarantee if he was doing that on you account, you would be raising h*ll about it. If you two decide not to share an account, than have enough courtesy to stay out of his business.

Second, sometime loans are given, money deposited, and papework still needs to be filed, signed, copied, etc. Did you ask him why he had the loan but still needed to sign papers? Oh, that's right, you couldn't, then you would have been busted.

***Hey Diabolikal***

What's the line on how long they last, and how can I get in on that action?

NeonLoveChicken

your upset because he is lying to you, but yet you yourself go behind his back and check his bank account?!? This problem runs very deep, maybe you should consider marriage counselling.

Ralfcoder

Looks like there are lies, deceit, and a lack of trust on both sides.

My first comment - DON'T HAVE KIDS TOGETHER. At least until you resolve this, and you trust each other.

That may seem like a "DUH!" piece of advice, but this marriage is in trouble, and possibly heading for a divorce. If you don't have kids, that makes things much simpler. If you do, a divorce makes much more likely that they're in for a hard life. And it's always easy to kiss and make up, but that kiss can lead to the bedroom. Also, sometimes the woman may think that having a kid will help tie the couple together. Sorry, it doesn't work that way all the time. But it's the kid that suffers the most when the marriage fails. So cross your legs, or use 2-3 different forms of protection.

If you do have kids, you need to work harder than ever to resolve this. Get things out in the open - admit what you've done, tell him what you know, and clear the air. You may still be in trouble, but at least you don't have to hid what you know. And then get marriage counseling.

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