Any advice on an unhappy mrriage?? I love my hubby but i am out of ideas...please help!!!?

Sugar Dumplin

Have you tried going to a good church? I just don't think marriage these days can work without God. That's my opinion. Best of luck to you. God bless.

queenie_the_big_pushen_meanie

why don't both of you write down 5 things that the other can do to make you feel loved and promise to do it for the next few weeks and see if that helps. you can add to the list when ever you want to but not alot at once. also i would check out the book the five love languages. It really worked for me!!!!!!!

*darling*detective*

well, you gotta be more specific dear in terms of what kinda problems do you have before I guess anyone can really advice you!

Cheers!

JAZY

Well all of these suggestions that these wonderful people have given u r great suggestions and I am saying it b/c I am going through the same thing too but I would say COMMUNICATION and ALSO GO OUT ON DATES LIKE YA LL USED TO WHEN YA LL WERE JUST BOYFRIENDS AND GIRLFRIENDS TRUST ME THAT WILL SPICE IT UP A LITTLE BUT GO OUT WITHOUT YOUR BABY I KNOW THAT SOMETIMES ITS HARD TO LEAVE UR BABY BEHIND BUT YOU HAVE TO B/C THERE ARE TIMES WHERE YA LL HAVE TO SPEND TIME ALONE AND QUIET AND ROMANTIC JUST HAVE FAITH IN GOD AND EVERYTHING WILL TURN OUT FINE.

winona e

Maybe try another counsellor. It may work. Good luck!!!

First you have to ask yourself if your husband feels the same way and work from there. Because if he is not willing to work on the marriage then it may not be worth fighting for.

GRINGO

Maybe you should find another marriage counselor or sit down with hubby and lay everything on the table and communicate without yelling and screaming in a calm way. That is the mature way of bringing out the problems in your marriage. You two need to get to the root of the problem, be it whatever issue it is.
I will say one thing: If you are being physically abused you should get out of that situation immediately. If you are not and it is verbal, well, that's not really good either.
You two grown adults should realize what this fighting is doing to your precious child. Your baby feels what you feel and is reacting with fear and sadness when you so called adults squabble. Have you ever thought about that before? Do you want your baby to grow up with emotional scars because you two are fighting all the time?
Ask yourselves these questions. Just think about the effects that are happening to your baby now. You and your husband are doing permanent damage to your sweet little one. You both should grow up and be resposible to each other and the little one. Please excuse me for being so forward but you asked and I am just giving you my input as much as you probably hate hearing it, this is all true what I am telling you.

Good Luck with your relationship

Samba Queen

You need to take your baby and move on. Sure you will be sad for a little while. You may even cry. But you WILL get over it and you WILL move forward with your life. Your baby will be happier for it and you will have provided your baby a safe and healthy environment to grow up in.

Liza

Allow me to first say you are strong to have kept going you said you have tried counseling and it didnt work why not find out things for yourself first and i dont mean talkiing to your husband first but to yourself you two got married for a reason you love eachother now try and figure out why you dont really get along now it could be sumthin you know but neva really paid any attention to,after you things will be revealed to you ok hold and Good Luck.

timer

No one can answer this question or give any kind of advise or relate their own experiences.
Why is it an unhappy marriage?
What is the fight about?
So you have a 14 year old son, okay
You don't want a divorce
you are out of ideas on what?
counseling did not uncover what the problem is?
You are tired of feeling sad because you do not know why?
Sorry, I don't know WHY either (?)
Talk with him why you are sad, ask him why he is sad. Lets start all over.

tuktuk

Hi! Its really sad to see your condition when you are unhappy with someone whom you love and want to be with. I guess no councelling really works unless two people involve in it realize the problem and how to reach towards the solution. i can give you a suggetion see if it works for you. Stay separate along with your kid from your hubby for sometimes and then you both may realize where you are exactly falling short and top of it are you guys missing each other in your lives. Its actually worked out with a couple I know. best of lucks.

xxgq

you need to learn to have communication with each other. Work this out its part of life. Life will not be all good times there is times that we have to work thru

Best of luck

samuel_jones88

hey you can do one thing. start chatting on yahoo messenger and add me to your friend list. we can discuss this in detail on chat. you need a nice punching bag to take off all your frustation. i really care for that little baby of yours and pray to you to stop these all things at the earliest.

msqtech

try boundaries in marriage book for yourself and it gives hints about how to respond.

Good Luck and God Bless!!

leighdevaney

i know it may sound drastic, but have you tried a trial separation? it may give you both some time and space to work out your feelings for each other.
Hope things work out for you, i really do. good luck.

sarita tiwari

i wish i could help u...........but only u can help urself.ill pray for u two,u three rather!!! god bless

angi8118

This is a tough one and I feel for you. My opinion is that if you are unhappy and counseling isn't working to help you get along, then you should get out of it. Your son will still have 2 loving parents and you won't be miserable. Do you want your son to see you fighting all the time? Do you want to be unhappy until he turns 18 and moves out? I know you love your husband, but if you and he can't make it work, then maybe it's not meant to be.

bella

Try this site, I have a kids and we are a busy family, this book has been wonderful to us http://www.reuniting.info/.
If not , try other literature. Dr Phils relationship rescue is supposed to be quite good.

blak_gurl

Maybe he's just not used to having someone Else in his life. He'll come around, guys seem to feel as though their territory is being invade because you don't just belong to him anymore.

Surjee

I d say.... Caring for some one who dosen't care for u is insane..... there is no point .... u r not happy and so is he and so is the rest of u r life gonna be.....

Mike

Counselors are no different than doctors, mechanics or lawyers. If this one's not helping, get referrals from friends or doctors and go somewhere else. Like every other job, some people are good at it and some aren't.

Lady Hewitt

Separate for a while and then try to not live in the same house and work on your marraige while you are apart. Do you ever have alone time with your husband without the baby with you? Why do you fight so much and not get along?

Pari

How about taking a little vacation. Environment makes alot of difference.. if your out together away from work, family things wil be different and i think that's why you guys are fighting day and night its cuz of stress of work and family etc.... it happens in every relationship at one point and that's when you need to take a vacation go somewhere places to see and relax yourself and when you come back your a total different person...I hope this helps!

Amantia A

Yes, I also think you should give each other some space - maybe separate for a period and see how things go. That will be better for each of you, including your 14 month old son
good luck!

Rocks

Communication is the key to a successful marriage. You guys need to talk out your frustrations, what is upsetting the other. Accept what the other says when they are saying it instead of accusing of false accusation. Listening is more important than speaking. When both speak and scream at each other no one is listening to each other.

alysonhell

Sounds like he is out of control. Leave him for a while and see what happens. Maybe he will see you are serious about making this work.
He won't change until he is ready.

LEO H

Sounds to me darlin your trying to knock down a stone wall with a rubber mallet...

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