Apologize to my mistress' husband?

Brooke

i think you should apoligize
its only fair

sarah kay

leave it. a man who's sending emails to threaten his wife's lover, is no man. and what if he told everybody? that would make him look like an idiot too. if he was man enough he would beat the crap out of you. but he's not. that's why his wife cheated on him. loser!

Brutally Honest

Just ignore him. The person who's responsible for an apology is his wife....

kitkat

Leave it be, he vented and now maybe he can go on...

chasing the white rabbit

Leave it be. But if it gets out of hand like he comes to your work then I'd apologize. Don't do it in a email.

Anna J

you could apologize...but that probably wont change the way he feels...it might hold back his retaliation...but he will still hate you...and probably never trust his wife again.

Flipper

Leave it be. He should be angry with his wife, not you. If you reply, you're just escalating the situation.
But block is email address.

InspectorBudget

Unfortunately, you have fallen to temptation, and are now reaping the consequences.

I commend you on realizing this, and that you have committed to repair the damage you have caused to both your family, and that of the other woman.

The responsible thing to do is to write back, and apologize, and let him know that you are sorry, and will never do it again. And mean it. Don't even talk to her again if you encounter her anywhere.

He may still be angry, and may yet carry out his threat - but it was you who started the entire thing, so you really have no call on his reaction. Just resolve to never again hurt your family and relatives in this way.

I wish you well.

Aug the Conqueror

if you write one e-mail, he will reply, it will lead to another e-mail, and another, and another, and eventually a phone call, and maybe even the unwanted face to face confrontation. it's a catch 22 really. yeah you should apologize, but if he is still raging angry now is not the time, because it will fall on deaf ears. when people are mad at you, they never listen to what you have to say. so give it time, then make a sincere apology to him and her.

SuMmEr

You could attempt an apology, but it seams to me his wife is the one who should be apologizing. he should be angry at his wife. He must have split with his wife, otherwise why would he want to expose her misdeeds to the world. I would ignore him and if he chooses to tell others, so be it. You have to face the music.

Mean Carleen

Leave it be. You didnt break trust with him...SHE did.

`!..^$DeAtH~ D

apologize for him but in a formal way, like tell him ur wife is a victim and she doesnt need every1 gossipin about her, like wut would he feel if u did the same to him? if he doesnt accept ur apology ,fight fire with fire..
goodluck there, wish u the best with ur wife...

Christine

I almost wonder if he's trying to see if you'll contact his wife again if he gives you a "reason." Best bet, leave it be. He wouldn't be satisfied with your apology anyway. If he continues to contact you, block his emails and have absolutely NO contact with his wife or him. Both this guy and your wife have a lot to forgive, and any contact you each would have with each other would only cause more problems. Good luck to you.

Rachel J

You can't apologize for sleeping with his wife. You meant to do what you did. That is how he will see it. And answering will just stir up more emotions. He is probably just looking for a way to vent off his anger. Just leave him be.

naniannie

I think an apology is in order. However, after the apology I think you might consider asking him to stop trying to contact you as you feel it will be better for everyone's efforts to get over this if you are not in touch. He is either going to tell all and humiliate himself, along with you and his wife and your wife, or he is going to get a grip and start rebuilding his life. Either way, the damage is done and you have not one whit of control over what he chooses to do.

Catherine1

No, you did'nt break trust with him, but you did cause him tremendous pain. I'm glad that you acknowledge your mistake and that you and you're wife are trying to mend things. But you must also accept that indirectly, you have caused damage to another marriage.

In my opinion, an email outlining your regret over this affair would be a kindness. Then don't enter into any more correspondence with him. Good Luck with everything.

New Nana

A true thought out apology would be good. Tell him as you have just told us. Im sure its a hard thing. Its funny though that the spouses get mad at the other person rather than on the spouse that cheated on them. They need someone else to blame. Good luck with this.

anniebell

leave it be. if he tries to harm you in any way call the police.

mutterhals

That's between him and his wife. The only person you need to apologize to is your wife. He sounds nuts.

redpeach_mi

i would apologize. it would be the right thing to do. he's hurt. you are all hurt by this. my hubby recently cheated on me and i hate that other woman. however, no matter how much i hate her, i would like for her to apologize. i wouldn't accept the apology right away, but at least it would show me that she was truly sorry for tearing my family apart.

Julia

Leave it alone its over and the womans husband needs to put the total blame on his wife where it belongs and keep it there!! If he is that hurt and out of it he needs to take his wife and get some counseling as I hope you and your wife are doing? You are very lucky that your wife is trying to work this out with you....so the last thing she needs is anymore humilation from it. If this man tries to contact you or harrass you and your family again call the police to put a stop to him or file an exparte against him! Protect your wife from any more hurt that she has already endured and never ever do this to her again.

Petunia

Erase everything and move on with your marriage. your wife and you have alot to get over. Never mind rehashing up what already happened to you and them... Let it go and work on your relationship.

mama2be

what would you wanted him to do if he was the one that scewed your wife? apologize to you or just let it be. ask yourself that and do what seems right for you. peace

cleveland mami

i think you shoul apologize it wont fix everything but its one step closer to closure for everyone

Big Deall

If you have told your wife then don't worry about it any response will only cause more of a conflict with him and he has every right to be angry with you but should also be angry with his cheating wife. If he has stayed with her then it is something he will just have to deal with himself.

nite_angelica

I would reply to his message. He wants some type of validation of the way he is feeling. It's all out in the open anyway.

I don't know that I'd tell your wife and I certainly wouldn't try to contact his again, but I would respond to him. To act like he never even said anything to you, after you laid down with his wife is even a bigger insult.

While it won't be pleasant, I say it needs to be done. My guess is that you will receive a 'venting' email from him after you respond, but you'll survive.

You and this man's wife ruined (perhaps not permanentaly) two families. You owe it to him and her to try to make amends.to him if it helps him heal from the damage your actions (and hers) have caused.

Good luck to all of you guys.

jude

i would apologize in a sincere way, because it can be forgiven by him with just a few honest words from u, alot of hurts are forgiven this way and he will be able to find peace and restore his marriage. make him understand that u know what u did hurt him terribly than leave it alone. this man can do u harm in the future if no forgiveness is found on his part. plus not to mention your own conscience. right now he wants to hurt u as bad as u hurt him, so humble yourself to him, he was hurt by all this too just like your wife. lucky you that your wife was willing to forgive u. if u humble yourself it will all be forgiven and the man won't be able to hate u anymore.

Shelley L

Sure. Apologize and let him know that your family already knows and you are trying to move on. Maybe he will too.

V D W C D

leave it b

Moosey

let it be. he is hurt and wants to hurt you. he is acting immature. if my neighbor came over and started talking like he is saying he wants to, i would shut the door in their face.

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