Are there husbands, who doesn't "own" the wife...?

Ivan S

I think husbands and wives should be best friends!

Kevin J

There are lots of husband out there like that. Keep in mind there are some marriages where the wife is the one who runs the show and the husband is not allowed to have an opinion. The only way a marriage can last and be happy is if both people have an equal opinion in everything.

housewives5

Me and my husband have equal parts, opinions, decisions in our marriage!! He does not run my life, nor do i run his!!

pinniethewooh

Of course. Wives aren't property to be owned. That's an antiquated way of living. My husband and I are equals.

Lisa W

my husband doesn't own me. we are equals. i walk beside him, not behind him. there are alot of other men out there just like mine.

Zaferus

Of course there is, don't listen to the vocal minority.

swtlilblonde31

I let my husband be the man of the house, in other words I let him be in control. Because of this he values my opinions and respects me for showing him respect. We essentially work as a team and I rarely get told no. But if you constantly undermine and disrespect a man he will feel the need to assert his dominance

molly

My ex husband thought he "owned" me - that is why he is my ex. I don't know why some men think that.

My current husband knows he doesn't own me, and very much values that I am a strong individual.

I believe that a woman should be able to support herself financially, and if she contributes financially to the relationship she has an equal say in how their lives are run. I am teaching my daughters this also.

~Jennie~

Uh yeah, wow that is a sad Q!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Barkditch

My partner does not own me, nor want to. He knows that giving me space and freedom that I will always make the right decisions. He has learn in the past that if he tries to force me to be a certain way or do a certain thing, that is when I get in the car and f-ck off for a few days.
My partner often asks me for advice and will do what I have suggested, just as I do with him. He lets me control the finances, so that all the bills are paid, and never says no when I need something or the kids need something. He wants me to be the very best that I can be, whether that is being a stay at home mum like I am now, or training which I a also doing or working. We are and have always been, a team.

The Voice Of Reason

my husband and I are equal. He and I talk about everything and are 50/50 in all. I think that when you are not in a realtionship that is 50/50 that is where the cheating and lying come into play. Woman feel unloved and wanted and go else where to get it.

aza

Agree with Lisa W. There are a lot of nice blokes out there who know that everyone is equal.....I think you'll find that in this day and age it's the norm...............unless you marry a 90 year old??

whalelvr72

partners through it all here.

MrAnniversary73

I am a husband of nearly 7 years, for both of us this is our second marriage. For me, my 1st wife was extremely controlling. It was almost like being a prisoner in my own home.

Because of this, I have always been determined not to be like her. I think most other guy's simply don't get woman. I'd like to believe that I do get them more so than most.

Our relationship is extremely unique, we met at work and later I started my own company in which we worked together for over five years.

I have always done all of the cooking, handled all of the finances and we generally share in the cleaning. I am kind of like a Mr. Mom but also run my own business from home at the same time.

We decided recently that it might be good for her to go out and make a career for herself so we don't keep all of our eggs in one basket. I have been extremely supportive of her and she has worked very hard to do the best she can to move up in the company in return for everything I do.

I am not controlling at all as she is free to do whatever she pleases and I am free to do whatever I please. If she wants to go out for a girls night out or spend a day doing her hobbies that is fine with me and she allows me the freedom to do the same without question.

I think what most people fail to learn as that when you are married it is essential that each person feels like they have there own space and own idendity separate from the core relationship. It is also essential that each person does things for the other person that they may not want to do for the sake of doing something that is important to the other person. And lastly, it is very important to listen to your wife without trying to solve all of her problems. The reverse is also true. We do this often when my wife comes home, we will usually open a bottle of wine while I let my wife unload from the day. I don't try to be superman and try to solve her problems, I simply listen attentively to let her know that I care, then we talk about my day and she listens to me.

Hope this helps.

I know, I know!!!!

My husband gives me total freedom and respect. Thankfully.

jennifer

Unfortunately, I am in this shitty situation. My husband does think he owns me; has said it before. It scares me - I've tried many, many times to try and talk to him about it but I'm not sure if he really doesn't get it or if he just doesn't want to admit it. Either way, he's gotta change or I gotta go.

"Hooks"

.The husband only owns the wife if she lets him.
Yes, there are plenty of husbands that consider their wife as an equal, and they are loved much more for feeling that way.

chefsky2001

Who wants a one sided relationship. I married my wife for the person she is not what I want her to be. We talk about everything and go from there I know I aint always right. trust me she will tell you.

*never give up*

my husband does doesnt try to control me whatsoever, nor does he "own" me.

fungirl

Me and my husband are partners. We both voice our opinions, make decisions together, and are compassionate to each others feelings. That's what marriage is. We don't "own" the other. It doesn't work like that. We stand beside each other, not under the others foot!!!!

Pinocchio

I'm single. And, I happen to believe that men and women are different. We want different things in life, in love, and in a relationship. I have never, will never, own a person. I have possesed a woman before. Possesed her life in every way; just as she possessed me and mine.

OK, someone Paw-Pawed there. There is a difference there and it is not just a play on words. When she possessed me, I didn't give up any part or responsibility to her. I retained my everything. And she continued to possess me with my permission.

Permission is the key, here. I gave her a blanket permission slip while we were in love. When that love ended, for me before her, she knew the permission had been revolked..

So, I am the person that posed the original question. Why does the spouse think they OWN their spouse. People here are overwhelmingly not owned. And, it looks like, the ones who do feel that way, won't answer.

Austen

Yes, and i am also the type of man who would want to raise the kids after a devorce.

Owen E

First off you can never own someone slavery was abolished many years ago. Except for very poor countries possibly. But really to answer your question I think it would be a terrrible way to live life if you were never able to express your own opinions especially in marriage. If this is you yourwith a Controlling Jack a ss that needs some serious help. Husbands and wives work as a team they are to be considered your best friend and you help each other out and use both your talents to come up with opinions and solutions etc.

God Bless and I will pray that this is not you.

rightio

Its a two way street. Men get "owned" just as much as women do. As a matter of fact I think more men, than women are in a controlling relationship. Women (and Im not saying always) seem to have a greater sense of worth. They want to be treated a certain way and if they arent, they seem to speak up to change it. Men seem to be more accepting, and instead of speaking out, they seem to withdraw into themselves. Very rarely will a man come out and say they are in an abusive relationship, but I know of hundreds of males who would never admit to being in an abusive/controlling relationship with their wives. I think if the truth be known, there are thousands of husbands out there being dominated by their wives. So, the reasons why people, men and women included, want to own their spouse is because it makes them feel important. I guess if you allow yourself to be owned then the problem lies with you. If you want equality in a relationship then you have to insist upon it. The equality thing should become clear when you are dating and if there is any hint that your "intended" does not see equality the same way you do, then dont marry because people dont change. Its a myth. People think they can change their woman/man after they get married. If you havent got a lot in common then you should never have married in the first place. Maybe if people took more time to get to know their prospective mates, not just on a romantic level, but on an intellectual level as well, the divorce rate wouldnt be so high. Love seems to lack logic, and Im sure you would have to agree on that one....just read the questions on here.

If you dont want to be owned, then dont allow yourself to be.

hot wheels

That is me. Why do women let men own them? Why do couples not see this ownership thing. My wife is free to do anything she wants and she wouldn't do anything crazy because she loves me. If there is love their is not ownership. My wife has her opinion and listens to me and I listen to her if I don't listen to her the marriage looses. Guys learn well from their old father's, father and it is passed down. Learn to argue fairly and seek a counselor to help you to talk without their being a winner and a looser. Blessings+

dydasgirl

my husband always wants my input,and if we are not in agreement then we discuss and comprimise. I am the type of woman who will be submissive too so he doesnt have to be that way. He values my opinion because he respects me. I get so mad when I hear people use the terms own and submit and unequal. And alot of people refer these terms to statements in the Bible. you cant read one sentance in the good book and think you understood it! It does say that a woman should submit to a man and that woman was created for man, but it alsosays that a man should love his wife as God loves his church. That means he should respect her and value her, it doesnt mean he owns her. Generally speaking a wife who is treated with respect by her huband: in turn aims to please her husband! It is a womans nature to take care and nourish you dont have to make her do anything just show some tlc and she will do more than you could ask for. I guess I am one of the lucky girls in the world because my husband cherishes me not controls me, and I respect him in the same way. He doesnt have to make me do anything I do it if it needs done. And he doesnt pressure me to do anything, he trusts I will make the right choice. Sometimes he advises me but never pressures me. God blessed our marraige and I am thankful for that

blue_dragon

Mu husband doesn't own me. We talk about every decision we make. I am the one who forgets to fill him in on a lot of stuff. Like when I invite people over. He helps me with the kids. Four of which are from a previous relationship. He even says it's ok for me to go out with the girls if I want. If you are in this type of relationship, it will get worse if you don't talk it out.

Rushit Shah

they are lots of them..

You will be happy to know that there are husbands who even are not allowed to share there opinion .

Wifes rule

Suzy Q

yes the second time around i have a lovely man and he and i are c0 everything. we do all together and have each a say in all. with the x it was well he did this and he was it. well you know what hes sick and some of them are. you have to spot this and get out of it. they are not good to be around and they feel they own you yes, and there is nothing you can do unless they get help and most o f them don't' have problems they say.oh-well good luck

8754

I sent mine "free"

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