Argument with Husband please help?

Cherie C

The only thing that you should do is listen to what you're gut is telling you. If you have a sinking suspicion that this will escalate, I'd re-evaluate the situation and start making plans to find somewhere to stay until you got on your feet. The adult thing to do in this situation would be to sit him down and have a serious conversation about what occurred. First and foremost tell him that your main priority is your son and you will never submit him to seeing that sort of aggression from anyone let alone his father. Tell him in no uncertain terms what is acceptable language to use with you and what is not. Now if he was "just stressed", he will realize his error and try to determine what is appropriate behavior and how he should conduct himself when he's approaching a situation similar. See if he's sincere. If he is, you should forgive him but with the criteria that if it happens again you will carry out A,B and C. AND FOLLOW THROUGH. Tell him it's not a threat, it's a promise. He'll show his true colors one way or another and you'll be able to take it from there

realst1

Been there, done that!

Leave him now! He is an abuser and he will never get better without treatment which most men refuse.

Don't waste your life. You are not screwed. There are services to help you get away and start over again. Abusive men think they have you trapped because you are a stay at home mom with a small child so they treat you like this but you have options.

Don't stay, it will get worse and you may have to put up with a shelter for a little while but in the long run you will be better off and in the short term, you will be safer especially if the man has access to firearms.

Spousal Abuse has long term effects on children. Your son will either grow up to be an abuser like his daddy showed him or have low self esteem, fearfulness, and other physical and mental issues. You don't want that for your child, do you?

yogamomma385

Out, out, out. Get out before it gets any worse.

Susan O

GET OUT AND AS SOON AS POSSIBLE BEFORE YOU OR YOUR BABY GET SERIOUSLY HURT. If you have nowhere to go, you can go to a shelter, but it sounds to me like you are in danger. Please don't let it go any further. Think of yourself and your son. A child does not deserve to be brought up in a family where this is normal behavior. And you do not deserve to be treated that way either. Good luck.

The casual poster

Hunts, smacks around his women, etc...Wow, sounds like a real classy dude! I suggest you GET OUT ASAP! He'll have to pay child support regardless! Find a real man that doesn't get off by killing animals and grabbing his girl!

Calm..clear..Sereeennn..happy...

Wow...time to get him some anger management..

Mommy to Lauryn and Sydney

Leave, you are better off with out trash like that!

Quasimodo

Grabbed you by the collar and abused you verbally and there are guns in the house.

Gee.....I don't know....what should you do?

And just what was you're hubby going to do,stalk the vicious and wily deer of North America?

No sport there.

â™‚Muy ChiÉ´gÑ»naâ™‚

LEAVE.

dirtrockgrind

leave. as angry as Ive been with my girl i have never once got in her face like that let alone even touch her in an angry manner. lose the f*cking loser

olderwiser100a

don't worry about the spelling. i am always amazed how us guys can use and abuse our significant others and in the next moment tell them we love them. to me love does not include anything like what he has beend doing to you. you truly need to re-evaluate your relationship. i am afraid that the physical abuse may increase. it may be time for you, and your baby, to move on before something more drastic happens. to either one of you.

[]<its me>[]

LEAVE

pseudonymn

i would go stay with someone else if he doesn't chill out. he sounds mean and dangerous. does he drink? take your baby and go stay at your sisters, mom's, etc. life is too short to be badly treated, married or not.

plus the phone: that's two violent acts. if he knows you have no family to turn to, he's more in power and can increase the violence. see if you have a friend who could put you up briefly. see a social worker or call a hotline and see what resources are around. have a departure plan. if you live someplace where you can find work, then do it and see about cheap daycare. you may need to move. in areas around big cities, there is always work. the most menial job is much better than a mistreating partner! stay at home mom is fine if you can afford it, but doesn't justify putting up with abuse. if you can't somehow manage to leave right away, you need to look into getting any job, right away, to start getting independence. many daycare centers are great and very good for the kids. you need to make a plan and not be financially dependent on him. violence only gets worse.

tingaling

I say get a counsellor. If he ever gets abusive then leave. If your willing to work on the relashionship but he is not, then that answers your question.

loopy loo

you sound like you would be better off without him, you will lose all your self confidence if you let him treat you like this for much longer,

pirate

I think you know the answer because you asked 'how do you love someone and treat them this way?'

You don't. End of.

Get out. Now - this won't be the last time I promise you. You are worth more than that, everyone is, and you must respect yourself and your baby and end it.

I wish you all the luck in the world, and were I religious, I'd be praying that you have the strength to leave him.

iiidontknowdoyou

Why do you have to ask? Is this how you want your baby raised? Want him to turn out like his Dad? Leave now!

Wings

It's called abuse. As long as you put up with it you are the enabler. Call his bluff and leave. If he doesn't come after you consider yourself lucky. And the baby doesn't deserve growing up in that atmosphere.

noname

talk to him or someone else who can help

Tasha

Well Tammy. Are you seeing the red flags? Do you want your kid to grow up in this kind of enviroment? Do you want to have more kids with this guy? Do you want to stay another 10 years and then decide you can't take anymore of his bs? Ask yourself lots of questions and the answer will come to you.

kjtmom4

No one should be treated like this. If this is a common occurrence, you need to get out, now. Wait till he's gone, then pack up and go. If you need to, contact a women's shelter. This is abuse! You don't want your son growing up watching his father treat his mother this way. He'll grow up thinking it's ok to treat all women like that.

mrs 2009

File for child support n leave his *** cause u dont need to be around someone like that and yo baby damn sure does not need to b around that

Jenn B

You need to get out!!!! It will he hard since you have a very young child but be strong think of what is best for you and your child!!!! He will NEVER change it will only get worse!!!!! You can find someone who will truley love you and your child and care for you the way you should be cared for and treat you and your child properly!!!!!!!

T19

Sounds like he is being abusive. Don't take his crap. He has no right to treat you like that. Stand up for yourself and tell him that if he thinks he can treat you like that, he can hit the road...

Anji

It is your duty as a parent to protect your kids...

Leave this man before they turn into abusers someday...

True

Something tells me that girly_man is going to repost this question.

mcdannells

I just have a feeling there is more to this story then just this.
If you feel he is a monster leave him. Do you want a child brought up in such a hostile environment?
Sometimes two people are just not compatible no matter how much the two want it to be. Pack up and leave if he just blows for no reason what so ever then it raining outside.....

MorningGlory

You have to find a way out go to a shelter a friend any relative until he goes for help... No mater why he is mad he has the potential for violence against you and your child. Do not listen to people who think you have to reason with him It will not work, Please don' listen to anyone who thinks you are doing any thing to cause this. If you let him go hunting in the rain, tomorrow will be something else. It is his problem no matter what you say to him he does not have the right to abuse you physically or mentally abuse you.

Just leave any way you can. Please be safe.

1-800-799-SAFE (7233) National hot line for abuse They have a website also.

jenel

you have to think about your kid .he may not see it now but what about aa year from now ! think about the baby GET OUT !

bren7277

Sounds to me like it is time for one of you to go. I know it is hard to hear, but do you have friends or family that you can lean on for help. If that is how he is treating you, do you want your son to grow up in that type of environment. I remember Oprah had a show about spousal abuse, it was very interesting and the situation was very close to yours. On the Oprah show, the sons grew up talking to the mother the exact same way! I was horrified. You need to move on, not only for yourself because every one deserves better than that, but for your son! I wish you all the best of luck. I know that situation is not easy to get out of, but hopefully you have friends and family to help you through

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