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╚╔╩╦
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Most women keep it simply because it is a bit of a hassle to change it back to their maiden name (you figure everything has to be changed social security card, bank accounts, drivers license, credit card, etc.....), and if they plan of getting married in the future, then they would have to change it yet again. So they just wait until they remarry so then they don't have to go through the hassle any more than they have to. I don't really know why it would matter to you much anyway. As long as they are divorced, that's all that really matters. He's yours now, not hers. A name is just a name. |
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ladybugflu
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My mother has kept her ex husbands name until she got remarried. It's a lot to deal with to change it back. Plus, people at work know her by that name and changing it would confuse a lot of people. I don't think you should worry about it. I doubt she is doing it to spite you. She's probably doing it because it's easier and she knows if she gets remarried she'll have to change it all over again. Why do it so many times unless you absolutely can't stand your ex. |
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lawmom
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My mother kept my stepfather's name after their divorce for three reasons:
1. She didn't want to bother changing everything back.
2. His name was easier and nicer than hers.
3. To piss off him and his family. |
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LSU_Tiger23
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I don't think it's werid that she didn't change her name back. Lots of women don't. It's not to stay close to their ex's family either. |
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donanana
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Not really an issue. Some women just prefer not to go through the hassle of changing their name back again. It takes a long time to transfer everything to your new name and also a trip to the courthouse to change the name. She just may have decided not to bother. I wouldn't worry about it, it doesn't necessarily mean anything. |
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*New Mommy*
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My mom kept my Dad's name after they divorced. It's just easier to keep it. I wouldn't worry about it. |
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letterstoheather
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i don't understand why this is an issue for you.. you seem very suspect of this ex wife... apparently she is pregnant by someone else and in another relationship.
sometimes people keep their married name because it's a big hassle changing it on every credit card, bank account, doctor's offices, and with the social security office. she has had the marital name for a while now, and probably figures it's not worth the hassle to change it back
and also, her friends and associates probably know her by the current last name... why confuse the issue?
i can't believe you're worried about this, nor can i believe i actually answere the question LMAO |
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Freddie
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haha my mom did just to piss off my father.
so that was cool.
also she wanted to have the same last name as me. |
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chris d
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Most women keep the name..it is easy to be able to change but a pain in the %$# really do. There are a lot of areas where you need to change it and it is time consuming and all. I doubt she did it to cause problems. I never changed mine but I have since remarried so it doesn't matter and ex lives in another state any way |
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Rita
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It's very common for a woman to keep her ex husbands name.
In my case I wanted my name to be the same as my childrens.
It does cost money to change your name back. You said they didn't divorce because of money well that explains it. To write it into the divorce decree doesn't actually cost but to go and get all your official documents changed does. Same as when you get married. You have to get a new drivers license etc. Since you mentioned money that might be why. For the record it doesn't cost much but it's the persons own preference.
If she is out of your lives WHO CARES if she has the same last name? Shes in a different state. Try to get over it. |
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Private P
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Yes, that was my choice, it was none of his business. It is certainly none of your business, why are you concerned *so* much with his ex, sounds jealous to me.
If you did not want to "share a last name" with her, you should have kept your maiden name...doofus. |
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Victoria Ashley
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well, women usually dont because it can be a huge pain with all of your things that are with that certain last name. you do have to pay a certain amount also. not a lot of people will do it because of it. its perfectly normal to not change it back, but in the situation shes in it seems like shed want to switch back. |
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Kitty
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But what you describe is not that uncommon. My dad's ex-wife kept my dad's name (they did have a son, but I don't know if this was the reason for her to keep his name); my brother's ex-wife also kept the name, and they didn't even have kids. To my understanding, she liked it better than her maiden name. For some people, changing the name has a deeply symbolical meaning - but for others, the reasons are more aesthetic (or practical); it depends on the person. I don't think his ex wants to stay close to the family or anything like that... I bet she just hated her maiden name, or some stupid reason like this. My dad and the woman who chose to keep his name have been divorced for almost 40 years; my mom and my dad have been married for 34 years, and yet my mom chose to keep her maiden name. Things can play out in many different ways. I'm married for the 3rd time, but I've kept my own name throughout my life, so I didn't have the issue of changing it back and forth. I still carry my dad's last name, always have. Don't dwell on it, and good luck. |
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luckford2004
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I did. |
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BabeHeart
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I took my maiden name back between my 1st and 2nd marriages. When the 2nd marriage ended, I just kept his last name...I'd already changed mine 3 times and it's a pain in the tochis. I saw no real reason to go through all that mess again. |
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theoriginalquestmaker
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I kept my last name from my marriage because it was easier to spell than my maiden name. |
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lashunta
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No when I left him I wanted to leave the name.Unless it's on good terms and changing it would cause problems. |
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MISS_BUBBLES
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i was never married but i whould not keep his last name |
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Nancy M.
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I kept my married name and that was partly because I had the name for 25 years so why change it back? I have since remarried again and I now use my husbands name and I know that is what he wanted me to do. |
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antonel j
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never been married but one should keep it financial proceedings like claims for alimony |
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rcButterfly
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Changing your name back to your maiden name is as easy as checking the box. There's nothing else to it except the social security, driver's license and banking changes. A small price to pay. I was only married about the same amount of time and couldn't wait to take back my maiden name. I don't know why more women don't do it....especially if you don't have any kids. |
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Sunshine
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I'm keeping my ex-husbands name. Not because I care for him in anyway. Just don't feel like going to the trouble to changing social security card, bills, etc. Don't worry about it. It probably doesn't mean anything. Hope that helps.......... |
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nikie_atkinson
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I hate that my husbands ex wife still has his name well that is until she just remarried like a week ago. but it bugged me why keep the name of a man that you repeatedly cheated on. I know it bugs me so i see were your coming from. Also it cant be any harder than changing you name to your husbands name after you get a divorce it's probably the same process I think its just to annoy us. good luck with you and your kid |
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Shelley
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It's not necessarily abnormal for a woman not to change her name back to her maiden name. It just depends on the woman I guess. I am going through a divorce and I am changing my name back. It's not hard. It is usually done through the court at the time of divorce. They ask if you want it done. Then once it's changed through the courts, you have to change your social security and drivers license and any other bills, etc that need to be changed. Some women may not want to go through the hassle of having everything changed again. Since this woman is not married to him anymore, she can't legally do anything or have any part in his life unless he allows it. Hope this helps. |
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sunflowergal
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You can't force anyone to change their name, and if she finds out it bothers you, she won't change it for anything then. At my divorce, I changed my name, because at that time, I was engaged to be married, so, since I'd carried my first married name, I didn't want it to be anywhere around my 2nd married name. So, I went from Smith-Jones to Smith-White. Make sense? |
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oh_jo123
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I am not LEGALLY divorced but when It becomes legal I will change back to my maiden name. Someetimes it is easier to just keep the name they have now ( married) depending did they she get all of her personal documents changed as in SS # card sometimesit isn't so easy to change |
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myleslr
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My mother did, but her maiden name was Betteridge, and his was Young, and I think she just liked the name better lol. |
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katydid
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My husband was divorced with 1 child when I met him. His ex decided to keep his last name, so the child wouldn't be confused.
Here's how un-confused he was. One day he asked me if I was his mom's sister or if we were related somehow. When I told him no and asked why he replied "because you both have the same name". Mind you she's been married 3 times since they were divorced.
I know how you feel but you got the man, all she's got is the name. |
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Just passing the time!
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i did! |
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laflaca
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Sometimes people are just lazy it really is alot of documents that need to be changed and to have to explain to everyone the reason why can be embarrasing atlot of people just dont to avoid this I think your reading too much into this my dear.
but maybe she will change it by the time the baby is born because the baby will be atleast while at the hospital baby boy or girl whatever her last name is which can be embarrassing for the babys father. Happened to me.... because I dint bother with the change :( |
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surelycoolgirl
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I got married at 18 and divorced... I changed back to my maiden name. If I were to get divorced now, I would not change it back, but only b/c we have a child together. |
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Denise
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why would a woman go BACK ?..your maiden name was your 'virgin' name..your not innocent anymore !..A woman does not have HER own name..it is either her Father or her Husband. This is Biblicial. You will always be your dads daughter..but the 'lil girl ' was lost at the altar ! going BACK to your birth name is like undoing your past..denying it happened..even if you wish it were a dream..life is real !..good or bad !..and where kids are concerned women should keep their married name (until remarriage)..it links the fact they came from a marriage..not just a sexual encounter. Some people still have morals. once married..the name is yours...just not the man...once you divorce !..example:..no longer Mrs. John Smith...now...Mrs./Ms. Jane Smith !...Be proud Someone once cared enough to honor you with marriage..Grow UP..not FALL backwards ! Your daddy has his woman..your mother !....if you are someone's mom ..and/or sexually active AND still hold to some degree of spirtual conviction ( you must if you married in the first place )..dont just be a female...be a Lady !...like your dress talks about you..so does your name status...true or not at least represent yourself with CLASS. |
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CrissieN
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My husbands ex never took her van out of his and her name, and she hasn't been paying her payments on top of her taking the kids to the doctor and not paying the bills knowing that they will fall onto us because of our state law.. Because she has been doing this, his credit which is now my credit too has alot of bad hits on our credit which I have been working on for a while now to get straightened out and collection agencies are calling our house asking for her.My husband is getting deployed and she has stated that she isn't going to let me around the kids when he is gone... I am ready to make her change her name, take his name off of her van and figure out a way to see the kids..She bounces from guy to guy who automatically move in with her and I have to heal the kids heartts and mend their tears and the kids who are 4, 5 and 7 asked me if I was going to go away like everyone else..and I promised them I am married to daddy till they grow old and forever past that..Is it ok for me to go to her moms house who lives clos to me to see the kids..Their mom dumps them off on her mom and dad alot and we have had them 4 weeks out of every month so I am really attached to the kids and they are attached to me..what is a good way to go about all of this since I know my actions inadvertantly affect the kids? |
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HappyEx
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I was married at 19 for 20 years and have two children. My ex husband is now remarried and I'm sure after two years of marriage I’m sure his new feels I should change mine back but I won't. Why: My children for one, all my credit is in married last name plus I'm not married and I checked into it. The cost and hassle was just not worth it. I get to keep his last name she gets to cook and clean for him good trade, lol |
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happyexwife
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I am divorced & kept my exhusbands last name. We have no children together. We were married for 5 years. We have been split for 5 years. We have had zero communication in 5 years. I will gladly change it when I remarry. My maiden name is European, nobody can spell it our pronounce it. It is 10 letters long! I have established a career with my ex's last name. I have a family that I would rather not have connected to my professional life. My ex knew I was going to keep the name. I told him I would change it if I remarried. He could care less. My ex's name is a nice name. My advice to you is get over it. He is with you, not his ex wife. You choose to get in a relationship with a divorced man. You are being insecure. My name is my name. My name is my identity. Most of the people I work with do not even know I was married before b/c I am young. If I were to change it I would have to answer 20 questions. It's not their business! |
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