Do you think i am wrong for this?

Ms. Purpose

No, but the way you communicate it to him is important. Your sis in law is old enough to find her own job, true. She may not have been raised to be a go -getter though, so I would make a comprimise with your husband that you will help her find a job (maybe a little more than giving her a list) with the exception that you both will give her a time table in which she must begin working and making plans to move on her own. You can do such without a nagging tone or a fed-up tone. Just let him know where you are coming from, and your desire to grow in your relationship with him and your family and need your space to make this happen. Let him know you genuinely care about his sis, but that you feel her dependency on you two are hindering her growth and your marriage.

daisy322_98

It is not your job to help her. Maybe he is upset because he wants her out of the house. Lay some ground rules down for you sis in law. Give her a date when she needs to have a job and out on her own. She also needs to help with house hold duties as well as expenses.

Mom of 2

I have one of those SIL's too. No job, no initiative and this one has a baby and no boyfriend. I think you were right. She needs to help herself. If you go out and get her a job how is she going to find the desire to keep said job.

Also, as a hiring manager, it is an immediate "no" if an applicate does not call to inquire her/hisself. It shows the employer a lack of work ethic if you can't do what it takes to obtain your own job.

caraohara

No you are not wrong...it's up to your sister in-law to look for work herself. It's time your husband told her to get off her backside and get out to work...like the rest of the world. The reason she does not follow up on jobs is because ...She doesn't have to....she has a roof over her head, food in her belly, and all the comforts that go with living in your home. Your husband is doing her no favours, if he thinks you should be helping her to find work...it's time she grew up and took responsibility .

Tatyana S

you are right, if it is so as you told - let him help her to find the job for that lady. If he has such a great will to help - let them both call and find something where she can earn money for the life.

Conflicted

He's freaking CRAZY!!!

You are NOT wrong. She can call for her damn self. And, if he wants someone to do it for her, then HE should do it--it's HIS sister!

If she wants a job, then she needs to be an active participant in finding one!!!

roger r

kick her lazy butt out of YOUR house, tell your husband to get his sister a job and help you out around the house.
Sounds like everybody needs to wake the hell up!
Your due in July,and your dealing with this! give me a break.
Sounds like stupid runs in his side of the family. did his parents work or did they live with your parents?
Kick it to the curb,get out or go to school and learn something other than being a leach.

Mr O

whenever you let a situation like that happen it's very kind of you (to help out), but you need to put in stipulations/parameters/conditions, etc....like "you need to find some kind of employment within 30 day/60 days (whatever) and your own place soon after.

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