Found condom in his pocket?

Chris O

No, you only have condoms for one reason....if you don't use them then he's using them on someone else. Also they would give away a condom....not a box of condoms.

Dillinger

Maybe at a club for some promotional event but not in a box that only has one left and the chances are like nil. He's ******* around on you or there wouldn't be a reason not to answer your calls or lie about where he is. Leaving isn't going to help it's going to make it worse. You can't walk out on him and then expect him not to go cruising for women. I'm not saying it's your fault I'm just saying that I can bet he's screwing bar skanks. Either just get a divorce or get counseling. Right now he's got his cake and he's eating it too.

Glitter Berry

Once trust is broken in a relationship, it's really hard to get it back.
From my outside perspective, it really seems like this isn't a happy marriage.
He doesn't seem to want to work on it at all with you, with him not answering his phone and still going out to bars.
A marriage cannot be one sided.. so unless he's willing to try counceling or something, it might be better to move on.

cynthia ?

I hate to tell you this but he is cheating!

Mr. G

If you are separated, why do this to yourself.

Move on with your life.

blue_girl_05us

Nobody does that at bars. If he isn't man enough to tell you the truth that he does not deserve you.

Find someone better.

runs_with_scissors

Dump the bum. You deserve better.

just browsin

I wouldn't believe him...

brandi

NO DO NOT BELIEVE HIM, he would not just pick up a random box of condoms with one in it, you knew this or would not be asking. you are just trying to hear a better answer to not feel so bad. The divorce thing is for you to decide, only you know your heart. but he is cheating so take that into consideration.

Ariel

I think he is lying to you and yes i'm so sorry to say he is probably cheating on you. I know it hurts but you have to leave him. Best of luck to you.

Neka

The two of you are seperated and have been for several months. You can't expect him to stay home every night and knit. Just be glad that he is using protection.

basbleu37

I can't possibly give you marital advice, but I would not believe the story with the condom.

leira

If there is no trust in your couple it won't work. You seem to be a bit over possessive, you were still checking on him when it seems you were on a break. Why does he feel the need to drink. Talk about it with him. If you want your couple to work, you have to solve this problem. Maybe you should try to go to the bar with him sometimes and learn more about him by talking to his friends...
Good luck!

pennylane

i would definitely smell a rat.

racermom

First you said that you and your husband are separated so how would it be cheating on you regardless of what you found in his pocket?

No people do not throw condoms around in bars!! What a pathetic excuse and if you even for a moment believe him then that is silly.

You have already left him and he has moved on to other women.

Should you believe him? No!
Do people do that at bars? No!
Will he really change? No he has already proven that fact!
Should you divorce him? Yes, as he has already shown you that he has no respect for you or your relationship.
You're still in love......you are in love with a man that no longer, and perhaps never did, exist.

Lizard

When couples separate one will sometimes hook up with someone else. I'm sorry but it does seem pretty well laid out. He has been sleeping around. The story about the condoms is a well told story. No, people don't do that in bars. Tell him how you feel and he doesn't care about your feelings or share the same feelings it is not best to stay separated go through with the divorce. No use hanging on to someone who is not going love you back.

123

Do you believe people throw around condoms at bars? And if so, why would he just pick them up and put them in his pocket? I am sorry you are going through this. Every wife wants to believe the best. If there is one lie, there are usually many more. Would he be willing to go to counseling? If not, then it is your choice. Trust is broken if you are going through his pockets. At the very least that is something that needs to be addressed

That's Enough

Might want to move on. Sorry for you, but he sounds like he is young and dumb.

the_hedda_lettuce

What is his idea of not seeing others? The lights being off?

If he had a small box of condoms, one left, and one in his pocket......he's putting them to use somewhere.

Better start assessing your relationship. Where do you see it 6 months from now?

2boys2dogs2birds

OHMYGOSH Are you serious? You really believe that? Hoestly, that is the dumbest thing I have heard.

I had a couple of pals. They were married very young. She found condoms in his pocket (they were giving them away....) and phone numbers (she likes me, I took it to not hurt her feelings but I won't call her) and bought it.

Stand there. Pretend your daughter or best girl friend had the same story. And she KNOWS he's not trustworthy. SHould she believe him? WHY FOR GOODNESS SAKE would you tell her to trust him on this??

I would thank God he's using condoms at least.

There are millions of men out there. You have the chance to find someone mature. Someone honest. Someone with manners that doesn't go to bars or stay out late. Find a grownup!

OF COURSE HES LYING!

One last thing. When you find him doing something...before you confront him...imagine what LIES he will think up. I bet you think of some of the same ones he will then use on you.

You find condoms. What lie will he tell? He can't say he bought them. He must have gotten them from someone else. Of course! So he was holding them for a friend (eeew, too gross and unbelievable)...no...they were free! Of course he took the free gift of condoms that they always give away at bars! NOT

Geez.

ronidl76

LOL...yeah, he put the whole box in his pocket, but the box only had one left. Geez...an alcoholic, lier, and a cheater - oh wait, he's never cheated on you - that means he's a great guy.

Brandy

Listen to me. The key subject matter in this story is the word SEPARATED. You separated for a very good reason, you don't trust him. I wouldn't either since he is lying through his teeth. But if he is living else where, then how can he cheat on you? By your asking for or allowing this separation, you gave him permission to live and act single. So he is. He shouldn't have to explain himself or his whereabouts to you. Either you want him or you don't. In this instance, you have to make up your mind. You are only going to drive yourself crazy. Either take him back, let him move back home and you guys get some counseling, or divorce him. At this point you are in limbo, is that how you want to live your life?

ideally_rational

I'm sorry to tell you that you are in denial of the obvious.
Of course I don't know whether your husband used any condoms with another person, but he was at least thinking about it.
Nobody accidentally puts a condom in their pocket, sorry.

Lynnae_1969

Ya right he picked them up.....kinda like the old lies of "i'm hanging on to them for my friend". Come on...don't be naive or stupid.......what business would a married man have being at a bar all the time until closing time anyways. None...he should of been home with his family. Listen to you gut on this one despite the fact you love him, honey he's not being faithful it couldn't be anymore clearer.

beeeee

Apologies if this seems harse but, i believe that if one separates its done, i have never heard of a bar that does that and in the first place he lied about not being there and then you found out that he was so he is lying to you, rather hold on and get the divorce as it does not sound like he want to be honest with you and i know it wont be easy but, you can not trust someone that lies and then want to come clean when you found evidance, so rather go and start a new life with someone that wont lie to you , good luck and bfe strong

Big Red

If he is not seeing someone already he is looking. If you are separated and not living together then he may feel free to kick up his heels.

It sounds like he has a drinking problem and those are hard to kick unless there is a strong commitment from the drinker.
It does not sound like he is committed.

Sorry, I think it's time to move on.

Jackie

As for that happening at a bar....anything can happen at a bar. I wouldn't be necessarily concentrating all your madness on that part though. He lied to you. He said he was not at the bar, then only when he was caught with something that could be worse-did he fess up. He is lying to you about stupid things and if he lying about stupid things...what else is he lying about? Evaluate your trust in him....can you trust him not only to tell you the truth, but also be there for you? If he ignores your phone calls at the bar, that seems pretty shady to me. What if something happened to you? He wouldn't have known until the next day and by then, it might have been too late.....

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