He said I could leave if i wanted to? What??

Jane D

This doesn't sound good... He's clearly being non chalant about the depth of your commitment to each other, and whether that attitude stems from lack of caring, or overconfidence or resentful feelings over something, you need to get to the bottom of it. You should not be in a relationship if you feel like the other person could take you or leave you and they've actually shown such an air of indifference. I would NOT recommend infidelity as a means of testing him though. That will only add to the problems that already exist.

Aubrey

If you cheat on him then you obviously don't love him anyway so why would you want to stay? Leave him is the best answer. It seems like he would rather you leave then have to deal with knowing you broke your vows and cheated on him. I agree with him.

guardmaam

It sounds as if he is not totally vested in this relationship. Perhaps he is testing you. Why were you asking this question in the first place?

aangie781

kinda harsh.think hes hiding his feelings.trying to be macho about it as if hes indiffrent.

bozo

I think any woman would like to have her man upset about her perhaps going off and having an affair. Some men are very "phelgmatic" in their temperaments and can come across downright uncaring, but the fact is if he is built that way, you sometimes have to take his pulse to see if he's still alive he's so non- commital. I think you need to somehow gently draw to his attention that being upset about this would be an indication of his committment to you. ( Did I mention phlegmatics are very stubborn? He probably won't agree with your pov, that's all) . Usually they do care, very much, they just don't have a clue how to convey that.

~Blondie~

Well its either that he
has another women
on the side or he just
wants you to be happy...

lmdragonldy

Sounds like he is with it to me. You want to cheat, then you don't need to be with him and that's what he's telling you. Confident? Yeah, I'd say he was confident in all the right ways. He knows it's useless to fight for someone who wants to be elsewhere.

if you really cheat on him, then you should leave if you wanted to

nikky

He is right, if you cheat you loose!

SCSA

You 2 might be having a fight and he wants you out. But see if you can work stuff out and have some time apart then get back together.

gawainer

This is complex. He may feel quite ambivalent and not know what to do. Sometimes people say things out of pride ("I don't need you!") that are completely untrue. Needing someone puts you in a vulnerable position, and that is very uncomfortable for many people.
On the other hand, he may be looking for an easy way out. Further discussion is recommended.

party girl

What is harsh is you asking this question to him. Why would you even put your husband in that situation. Anyone who cheats deserves what they get and if you want to cheat, then end it with your husband first. I don't blame him for acting that way...

They call me ... Trixie.

It sounds like he loves you a LOT. I think a big part of love is caring about the other person's happiness more than your own. He's saying if you're happier with someone else, he'd let you go. If you really wanted to leave he'd be selfish to try and keep you with him. That being said, the game you're playing is a dangerous one - don't ask questions you don't want to hear the answers to.

m434u

If I am not good enough for my mate then she has the full right to go. But she has no right to take anything bet her ***

sweetme

Thats very harsh , thou in other ways he doesn't want to show it to you that he doesn't like such talk, and does not want to show what he would do if you were found cheating.

aegrant

It sounds like the truth - why would I want to be with someone if they gave what was supposed to be only for me to someone else freely - they don't love me or cherish the love I have (had) for them. If being with someone else makes you happy then do that and let me be happy with someone who will respect my love and faithfulness.

If your husband cheated on you with another woman, giving away what is supposed to be for you and only you. For him to cheat on you would make you think you didn't make him happy even though you have given him everything you have - you wouldn't worry yourself to death over someone who doesn't cherish what you have to offer.

shae

He sounds like a man who knows what he wants and deserves. He is making it ultimately clear for you what the consequences are if you do ever cheat.
Why would you ask that anyway?

party_2_hearty

he wants you to be happy, in whatever you decide to do in life

Mean Carleen

He is realistic. No man should EVER have to fight for a woman because if she WANTS to be with him that is where she will be. Why fight for someone who wants to be elsewhere.

bronzebabekentucky

might mean either he has cheated, or he doesnt love you like you thought he did

watergirl

Sounds as if he doesn't care either way. At least for now. His opinion may change if you do become involved with someone else while you are with him.

jennymustafa

No. He's right. Why go through the drama??? In the end trying to keep someone who cheated is not worth your time. I've been there and done that. My ex husband cheated on me the whole seven years we were together with tons of women and I fought to keep him and won every time. In the end I had a lazy good for nothing husband who had given me three children and I was working two jobs. Now tell me what good did fighting for him do??? NONE, because I finally got smart and left his A**!

~Gate~

Why would you even ask such stupid questions to him?
Why would anyone fight for someone who wants to be with someone else?
Don't play games by giving your husband hypothetical situations and then try and analyze his answers....very immature.

no, it sounds like he don't want a woman who would cheat

Katie Bug

It sounds kind of both. Maybe you and your husband should have secret meetings to make love and have fun like you are having and affair with each other.

Jack T

It was kinda same what I said to my wife. Have a read of mine posting and maybe it could be the same..

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgWnFlydvuf_OKz_KCiAOOnsy6IX?qid=1006053106114

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AiZx5MsI_lVpUw5QD6JBlhrsy6IX?qid=20060606214357AAlOA3U

angel h

it sound like to be that he don't want u no more . so u should just move on with your life and forget about him

Lemi

I think he would fight but he is too proud (like every other men) to admit

Drew

Neither. He, just like me, would say if you cheat, you're gone. That's it. I think your question to him was harsh. Cheating is the only completely inexcusable thing a person can do in a relationship. Don't ever do it, and that's B.S. that you think he could be harsh or overly confident. If my g/f who i loved for years now cheated on me, i'd drop her out of my life.

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