Hey ho, hubby is trying to contact ex mistress after she told him to leave her alone.?

jude

i would be so humiliated if this were my husband and i do not mean to hurt a person who is already hurt. but even after u found out he didn't stop. he still loves her and wants her, his promises mean nothing, if he doesn't keep them. and if she should end it for good, there will always be another to take her place. just because she ends it there are plenty of women who are willing to throw themselves at a married man. u shouldn't have to share him with anyone, or constantly worry about this. but until your ready to accept it for what it is, your going to keep getting hurt.

Mum of1

for the love of god get help urself as u seem to need it, u becoming so obessed with this mistress it is not healthy. u keep posting and dont like the answers, ur the only woman who will put up with it - how about dumping him, he doesnt know what got till its gone so if walk out he might change and chase u or he might run after the mistress more.

u can do better and if u just leave u can see this. so stop posting here, get some counciling, get help on divorce and leave his scummy @ss for good. not worth haven a man who is not interested in u - he only staying so wouldnt be on own, he only stayin for somebody cook, clean and do his washing he wants mother figure out u nothing else. when u learn that then people will give u credit but right now people will just keep on calling u a fool which u are for stayiing with him. time to leave now!!!!

MissE

Look I have been reading your questions and your husband did not want to end the relationship when you found out His mistress did.. He has not chosen to stay with you. You are the default position where he fell back into Just because he could. He clearly still wants her.
He repeatedly violated his promise to you not to contact her. He repeatedly lied to you and repeatedly he has treated your with total utter disrespect and disregard for your feelings.
If he truly loved you and respected you he would not have done this to start off with and would have kept his word. He has proven to you more than once now that his word means nothing and is worthless.

Why do you keep believing this man? Why do you keep hoping that he chooses you. He will not He will stay but ONLY because she turned him away not because he chose you. He will do this again, he cannot be trusted. He has proven to be untrustworthy. He has given you absolutely no reason to even start considering trusting him ever again.

You have to make the choice as this will destroy you. Leave him and live your life fully and not with an untrusworthy man. He WILL destroy your soul and your marriage

Ol' Dirrrtty Sanchez

You have asked 28 questions on Y!A, all of them about your husband and his ex-mistress and you expect people to not believe that you are a troll or at the very least a complete idiot?

Sorry for being so blunt, but if there is any truth to what you are saying, then you need to wake up, smell the coffee, pour it in his lap and move on with your life.

j0e

mommybee

pathetic

It's a sure thing

I believe he is obsessed with her and not IN LOVE with her. If he was in love with her, why hasn't he left you? You have no children. He has shown that he cannot be trusted so if she initiates contact again, he will more than likely respond.

DianeP

You need to be honest with yourself and ask yourself, why would you settle for a man who obviously doen not love you? Why would you tolerate being cheated on? Girl...find yourself and learn to love yourself, by yourself, and for yourself.
Some men want what they can't have, and since his "mistress" is with someone else, of course he is going to want her. But he would never be able to trust her, even if they were together....once a cheat, always a cheat.
I just hope and pray that you get out of this pitiful situation before you suffer anymore heartache. God bless you and good luck

Lucy

Please refer to the answer I gave you 3 days ago when you asked this same question.

keen2ts

he as unresolved issues with her. when men are like that it is best you leave them alone and get on with your life because your only gonna end up being hurt

Nina

Dump him. You deserve better than to be treated like this.

Honest

I just read all of this back to the date u posted..its nearly been over a month and just reading some of the stuff u write I felt like I was going around in circles!! I wasn't going to bother replying to u at all as u haven't taken on board anyone elses advice but then I thought I'd spell out OBVIOUS..if u havent clocked on yet!!

It is clear from what you've written that he doesn't give a toss about you and still wants this other woman who is the mistress but has loads more respect than you.

Why are u behaving like the mistress when ur the wife? the balls in YOUR court..he doesn't care about u.

Do u REALISE? he does not care for u at all. He doesnt care..how many times are we all gonna tell u this? wat will it take for u to realise that he doesnt want u or is staying with u cuz he loves u...he wants the other woman...

Lol- its quite ironic YOU WANT HIM..he doesnt want u..HE WANTS THIS OTHER LADY..and she doesn't want him!!

Goodluck to the pair of u. Deluded fools.

Are u an asian woman? would explain alot. Sometimes asian women get pressure from families etc..and feel like the community members will laugh at them for leaving their hubbie etc...Is that what it is? Lol.

sensible Miss

Do yourself a favour and log onto www.survivinginfidelity.com

You will find very helpful suggestions and advice from people in a similar situation.

taz6683

You are screwed.

Jonesy

Could you write a book on tips on how to prove your husband is a lying scumbag please? I would like to know how you know in so much detail what he said and what she replied etc. And do you disguise yourself when following them i.e. wig, sunglasses, hats? It would be fascinating reading.

kitkat

What are you, a door mat? Kick his sorry Behind to the curb and find a MAN!

Shannon

If she is a long-standing EF and you are newlyweds it should be a gradual thing to phase her out of his life (this is different than picking-up a new one later). They need some closure and it sounds like there was a decision to end contact. It's not easy; he will be depressed (grieving) afterwards.

You have to understand the paramount of what you are asking for; willful emotional murder. If he was did-have, was-having, or was-close to having an affair with her, it's not an unreasonable request.

Ask him if he is committed to you and to your marriage.
Reading some of the backlog/other questions you posted he's not acting like it.

Cathyo

Look up the word 'masochist' in the dictionary

padmalotusflower

He says a lot of things it seems and not one of them is true. I wouldn't trust him to give me the time of day.
You are the only one who can stoop your own suffering in this situation, but you're too attached to the thoughts that you are losing something valuable, when really you'd be gaining your own power as a human, as a woman to be strong enough to say you are worth more than this treatment.
is there a counselor in the picture?

ouragon

I don't know whether you're a troll, but your fantastical tale is exhausting me. How can you keep living like this? Where is your self-respect? Why do you believe his lies?

You cannot believe him. Email is cheating, in this case. Why are you so naive?

anythingwilldo

They are both lying. You have to relinquish this marriage - he is showing you no respect.

Banali

The reason he won't stop contacting his ex is because he doesn't have to. There are no consequences. Why should he? He can have his cake and eat it if he's prepared to put up with a few tears. You haven't kicked him out, you haven't left him. You haven't made it clear by your ACTIONS that his behaviour is unacceptable. You can talk to him until you are blue in the face, but until you DO something, he doesn't have to stop.

Right now, because she is being strong and refusing to have anything to do with him and you are behaving like a pathetic doormat, she is much more attractive to him.

And if this one does keep to her word and not have any more contact, I can absolutely promise you, he will find someone else to have an affair with.

10tolife

i thin your asking the wrong questions
you should be asking
1. why am i still with him
2. why dont i just ask to seperate
3. wouldnt i be happy if i didnt have to go through this
4. don t i deserver better

really miss i think you gave it your best shot
and it tell alot about him if you dont see it if not her who else will it be

Tony F

leave his sorry ***! Hes a waste of time!

Joe C

not good for you, at some point im sure he will try to hook up with her, if you let it go on there will be trouble for you, by all means just tell him its you or her, he sounds like he wants to play.... i would give him the boot and move on.

MAGGIE

midlife crisis that's all i can say.

Loney

i like to find someone to keep me as a sissy male maid all the time and make me do all the thing like a woman and make me be your maid and you can rent me out as a sissy male maid

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: