How do you know when your marriage is over?

â˜¼miss cleoâ˜¼

It depends on how old they are. Kids can sense unhappiness and tension though. You should do whatever makes you and your spouse happy, and the kids will adapt. Just don't drag them through the mud and make them feel bad about it. Staying together just for the kids is not always a good idea, you will be sacrificing both your and your spouses happiness and that is definitely not good for the kids in the long or short run.

Ramona-please step back!

Try counseling

jero

I dont know. Love is key.

misspriss070807

My parents stayed together for my brother and my sake...it was the worst thing they could have done. I would have rather only been raised in a one parent household because we both walked away very tramatized by the fact that they hated each other and faught all the time. It is your call, but you only got one ride on this earth why live it unhappy!

pogo_2640

a marriage is supposed to be forever, but now a days people take marriage for a joke. you should consult your significant other and talk about your problems, see a marriage counseler, and make sure you dont get your kids involved in the mess. if their is cheating or abuse then i think divorce should be considered. but when you said those vows it was til death do you part, why dont people take that seriosly anymore? good luck i hope it works out

Ashee

do you still love her?

Sometime all a marriage needs is some attention!

natasha s

Any marriage is over when both parties decide to stop trying to make things work, and don't care about each others feelings anymore. If you two still love each other, then do whatever you can to help your marriage work, like counseling, or just communicating with each other about your feelings on your own. If you guys decide that you really happy, and don't care about being married then don't stay married just for your sons. You all will be unhappy.

EVMMommy

CHILDREN ARE NO REASON TO MAKE A RELATIONSHIP WORK...YOU AND YOUR PARTNER NEED TO FIND SOME COMMON GROUND,FIGURE OUT IF ITS WORTH WORKING OUT,AND GIVE IT A SHOT...AND IF IT DOESNT WORK OUT..PLZ DO NOT LET YOUR CHILDREN GET IN THE MIDDLE OF YA;LLS PROBLEMS...GOOD LUCK TO YOU,HOPE IT WORKS OUT FOR THE BEST!

Dr Phil will say no, its not good to stay married just for the children sake.

cookie

You would not be doing your children any favors by staying in a situation where neither yourself nor your spouse is happy. Chances are that your children are just waiting for you to announce the news. If you remain in an unhealthy situation, you will only hurt everyone around you, including yourself.
If there is no longer love there, get out of the marriage. Thank you and GOD bless.

Why not me

That depends on whether or not you agreed to the "til death do us part thing," and whether or not you're a man of your word. There is always hope..

Allyson N

no cuz if u stay then ull regret it it will keep happening and ur sons will get sad if u get divorce but u wouldnt want them see u get in a fite all the time cuz they know that u guys both love them and so its all good

LilSunbeam

Marriages should never be over......not until your dead that's how you know it's over. Do everything you can to save your marriage, counseling, weekend getaways, re-ignite the romance, whatever it takes. Trust me it's worth it, nothing compares to a whole family and half is never good enough.

sawoyl

No, do you want your children to see two people unhappy in their life. Kids can sense more than we give them credit for. Never stay together just for the kids, that's a stupid reason.

lwomar

when an affair happens, lack of trust and lack of communication.

bigoldbird

I agree with the answer that suggests that staying only makes things worse. If things are bad, your children will have already picked up on it. I speak from personal experience and it was the single most difficult decision I ever took but five years on my daughter is a well-balanced, normal child. Had her parents stayed together she would have grown up in a negative atmosphere, which would have been the only she knew - and therefore would have had this as her benchmark of normality. She was - and still is - after all, the one that matters.

If you have tried your very best to save your relationship then - with respect and apologies to those who have a different view - it might be best to draw a line under it.

Good luck, whatever you decide to do.

leysarob

Children deserve to see healthy, happy, loving relationships. If you can't provide that, end the marriage. But work out a friendship with the former spouse so you can get along for the children's sakes. That's critical.

Angela O

I don't believe in divorce so I will know that my marriage will be over when the world ends.

It is better to work on a marriage for your sons sake.

Rock Candy

No, it's not. As product of a divorced Mom and Dad who ended up being ok friends for my sake, I can say that I am truely happy that they did not stay together for me. That would have been waaaay harder than having them apart!

Dig deep you'll find your answer.

Good Luck.....

Kris L

Is your marriage truly 'over' or are you and your wife going through a 'bad patch' right now? You have children, and children can be a HUGE STRESSOR on two people ... so it's UP TO YOU to decide what is right for BOTH of you (you and your wife) and also what is right for the boys ...
I'm a Catholic who has been married before (I became a Catholic after I had married my now husband, but still had to go through the whole 'annulment' process to become a Catholic) and both my husband and I believe in the idea that a good marriage should last 'forever and beyond.' What YOU need to do is decide whether that is the type of marriage you are in now ... and what your 'breaking up' could do to ALL MEMBERS as opposed to your 'staying together' and trying to work things out. Sit down with paper (a small pile of it, please) and start making pro/con lists (one on each side of the page) for each separate person in your family as well as for each 'group' (you and your wife ... the boys ... the four of you) ... and once you have done that, go away for at least four days, then come back, do the lists again, then four days later sit down and READ THEM THOROUGHLY ... that should give you a much better idea of your 'real options' here. If you can, talk your wife into doing the same thing, and after she has read her lists and considered her options, you can sit down and 'talk out' all of your choices in a reasonable adult manner, and can make a wiser decision. You may make the 'wrong choice' in the end ... but at least you will be making the 'best choice' based on 'reality' and not an 'emotional decision' that could be far worse for everyone involved.

Been There Done That

Marriage is really never over even when you get divorced....because even then you will still be financially and emotionally tied to her.

Personally......even with getting a new mate....it's really the same old shite....but a different package.....

I would stay with what you know......

go and buy the book

The 5 Languages of Love by Gary Chapman and learn how to communicate.....

1. Service
2. Gifts
3. Touch
4. Affirmation
5. Quality Time

if you learn how to speak each other language your marriage will flow with freedom and a deeper emotion.

jojo

It is not better to stay together for the childrens sake. Especially if there is a lot of fighting and negative emotions, it will affect the kids relationships when he is older. It did mine.

sparkles

I just went through a divorce me and my ex have 2 kids together and it is so hard having kids and trying to keep the kids happy during holidays and so forth. it is worth it to work on your marriage to stay together. I recommend christian counceling. When I was married we went to church all the time but the church we were attending didnt have great help for couples so we thought there was no hope. but I moved to another state with my children and started going to a new church New Beginings and I believe if me and my ex would have been going to this church and getting help from them we would have made it. believe me it is worth the hard work you and your husband/wife put in to stay together.

the kids and you both will benefit in the long run. If I can do all over again I would try harder. I will pray for you all

Moe

You know. It is not better to stay for the kids sake, children pick up on these things more then we realise and how healthy can it be to grow up in a house where your parents don't love each other. It is a good thing to try and keep a relationship with the ex spouse, that way the kids don't feel to blame or get stuck in the middle of something that has nothing to do with them.

~*NaaMean?*~

For your son's I'd stay, but don't stay and be miserable. Get help with your marriage. All of you deserve to be happy.

OOO K 611

You know your marriage is over when you say "I do". If you can't afford it financially and you love your children more than anything then you should consider staying together. If it is a typical marriage where you are just bored out of your mind then stay together. If you are always fighting and it is miserable then end it!!! Good luck!!! If you do get divorced, learn your lesson and NEVER GET MARRIED AGAIN!!!!

Positive P

Think positive and get to be happy in life.
Do the things you feel good with, its your life and you need respect, power and to get love.
All the best.

sweet_thing_kay04

It is better if u two don't fight. If there is alot of tension and fighting then no it's not better. If your staying for your son's and things are desent then congrats to u.

prettypumkin17

You know when you have to post this question instead of communicating with your spouse. Don't expose your children to a disfunctional relationship. It will only scar them in the future. Teach them that they always have a choice to improve upon their lives. You still have time to start over and show your kids what a happy relationship is.

momrfg2003

It depends - do you two fight alot? In front of the kids? Do you both want to make it work?

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