How does this sound????...............?
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How does this sound????...............?
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How does this sound????...............?
Me and my boyfriend haven't talked for a whole week. I sent him a text on saturday and he finally responded. I asked him "why did you stop talking to me. I just want to hear from you", he texts back and says "i've been thinking and i'm wondering why are we still together if we can't understand each other." (I had no idea what he was talking about because for the past 4 weeks everything was going fine.) Also we have kinda a language barrier issue. He speaks little english and I only speak english. I questioned him and I asked him "why did you ask me to be your girlfriend because you knew when you first met me that we didn't speak the same language". He says " i still want to be with you i just want you to change the way you act or attitude?" (i had no idea what he was talking about because I never got smart with him) so i told him "okay i'm willing to change if that makes things right between us", and then i told him I didn't like how he ignored me the whole week and he asked me to forgive him and I told him I forgive him. But I haven't heard from him since. This guy is confusing me. I really really like him but I don't know if he really wants me
Additional Details
And I have friends who translate for me. So that's how we understood eachother so well through the text messaging but in person we seem like we understand eachother when we're speaking only english
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Dr. Maggie (Psychologist)
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listen, I hear you like him; however, you will be confused often with him and emotionally you are setting yourself up for more and more hurt because language is so very important because as you are leaning it is so easy to misinterpret each other, and chances are it will only get worse over time. I am concerned you are not really knowing each other at that level you can truly understand one another.
Confusion will be the mainstay with this relationship so I recommend you let him go now before you get too emotionally drawn into him, or the idea of him. I am confused as to how or why you could ever get to know him at the intimate level as this is what one needs to move forward in healthy relationships.
Having a translator also tells me there is a third party which puts more stress on an intimate relationship, which begs the question: What are you afraid of with guys who speak the same language? Do you fear you will heard or valued. My concern here is that you may have a low self esteem which would explain why you are choosing a guy who does not speak the language. You just start out with so much staked against you from getting close to him when you cannot understand what is saying. This would all be different if you all ready knew his language; but you don't so this is not on an equal playing ground.
Please search your soul and be very honest with yourself. You deserve to be in a relationship where you are heard and understood, and without all of this confusion.
I care so keep me informed as to your decision.
Dr. Maggie |
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al t
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different cultures.........different expectations........you tried, and it didn't work.........so much for your humanitarian issues....be nice to yourself, pick up your life and move one..........that's what he is really tellin' ya. |
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Jane Marple
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He doesn't want to be with you.
Find another boyfriend and one that speaks your language this time. |
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Taylor
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i would find someone who speaks english just like you because he seems like he doesnt like you anymore |
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