How to deal with too much of a "people person" husband?

mr pickle

Don't be so co-dependent. Get your own life realized. As you change, he will also. Not a word necessary.

No More

I suspect he likes to have others around because the one person he is not comfortable being around is you. What kinds of things do you do together as a couple? Perhaps he is bored or the two of you have different ideas of what fun is.

I am much more of a home body that my wife is and in truth I have some self centered hobbies. Like Yahoo Answers for instance... I come here but usually when my with has gone to bed... I like to listen to music... my wife likes music but it is something low in the background that she talks over... I play the guitar.... I am comfortable being alone.

My wife likes to eat out, be with friends.... she is a living beer commercial of hanging out, talking and chillin' with friends. I have to gear up to be with that crowd but I do it.... and my wife gets bored at the house... so we are always battling over our weekends.

I think the only thing you can do is try to explain to your husband that he is not giving you enough time and that you feel like you come up short on his list of priorities... That should be enough to spur some kind of improvement on his part. Good Luck.

ashkii

It seems to me that the only one that has a problem with his behavior is you. You neglected to mention if others are bothered by his ways. Perhaps, it is you who needs to change or be more willing to accept him for who he is. Did you not realize this aspect of him when you married him. I only say this because I have been married for 17 yrs. and my wife sounds alot like your husband. It's just her nature, and I have come to accept it. You have to accept the good with the bad if you truly love them. I hope you were looking for an honest opinion and not just what you wanted to hear. I don't stroke egos on this site just to get the "best answer", I try to be honest because that is exactly what I'd want in return.

âˆž sky3000 âˆž

you actually describe a very wonderful quality that many of us lack. What is life about other than spending it with other people, helping other people and making little sacrifices to benefit others.

You can not change him. Even if you could get him to yield to your wishes, he would not be happy. He would regret your selfish pressure on him to conform and I suspect your relationship with him will suffer.

I say don't do a thing or you will regret it.

I'm the complete opposite. I can't be around people for too long or I get a headache. I'm not joking. I am not mean to people but I like to be alone rather than visiting people at their houses. My husband accepts me this way but he did say one time "my gosh do you want to move out to the middle of nowhere"? I was like yep let's go.

Douglas B

He for some reason is trying to find his worth by his acceptance by others and feels that he is a welcome guest at any time. I went through some of that, it seemed like my dad did the same thing so it seemed natural to me. My wife has been trying to point out how it isn't and to call before going to make sure they are going to be home. It has so much to do with upbringing but it can also be brought under control.

kim h

You should love the way he is. He does this because he wants to. He wants to be with people, he wants to socialize. Telling him that the way he is is wrong is not going to help.

IDK!!

Oh this is my husband too. I have not suggestions.

I bet he also has a 'guy' for EVERYTHING!! You know a "tire guy", a "Mulch Guy" Someone for everything a "at a great price" and always hooking people up with each other.

Janet W

I have to ask if you didn't know this about him before you were married. I understand that it may not have bothered you as much then because now he's neglecting you. He does need to make you a priority in his life, your his wife. Everyone else should not interfere with your relationship with you. He needs to give a little and cut back because it sounds like your trying to keep a balance. I'm not sure what you could do if talking to him doesn't help. Maybe you can just explain that he should have a schedule that maybe Weds. and Fri. is your special time together or date night for just the two of you.

johnnysunshine11

You have a very insecure salesperson there. Here's the deal...if you have kids then it's simple. Keep involving him with them as they grow and have him get busy with activities. If you don't then he needs to simply know when to shut it down. I understand handing out business cards at social events to a degree since I was in sales so long. I don't understand not shutting it down, being done with people at parties, at restaurants, etc. If he can't then it's time to show him life's worth...alone time is better than socializing. Prove it to him...there are ways and I think you know what I'm getting at. It's time to complete the circle...let him know that by showing him a good vacation alone together...insist on it strongly. He needs time to unwind. I understand the economy is making him more desperate but hell...desperation leads to the end of a career. Or relationship...or life. Relax him or help however you can...

grammie

You are so wrong. My husband is like this and when we first got married (32) yrs. It also bothered me. But now that we have been married for so many years. My husband has at least a hundred friends or more, They would give him or our family the world, as would my husband if we needed it. There is nothing in this world worth more than friendship, and love of a friend you can count on.

I wish I could say the same about me. Although I do have friends but nothing like the ones my husband has. He can call anyone of them and they would be happy to see him.

And thank God my son is just like him, So be happy that your husband is so out going.

Â§Î£X Gâ™¦DDeÂ§Â§

omg what a little social butterfly -- lmao.
I would tell him he needs to calm down a bit.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: