Husbands working with a woman tonight. I need advice on how to handle this maturely?
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Husbands working with a woman tonight. I need advice on how to handle this maturely?
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My husband has to work CQ tonight. It's a 12 hour night shift where he runs the front desk of a dorm on his military base. I found out that he will be working along side a woman and this makes me feel uncomfortable.
I'll admit yes I am very insecure. I was in a long past relationship right before I met my husband that left me really scared and unable to trust a lot of people. Not only this but about a month and a half ago my husband went through this phase were he lied constantly. It was never about anything serious just spending money on unnecessary things then fibbing about it. So thus the inability to trust continued. But he has never lied about woman or done anything of the nature. He is a very sensative guy and worries constantly that IM the one who will break his heart.
I'm worried about tonight. He will have nothing to do but sit down and answer phones for 12 hours and study for his tech school graduation. I get horrible thoughts of what could happen between him and the woman and how he would hide it. If it wasn't for the trust issues maybe I would feel different about this, I'm not sure. He is allowed to have him phone tonight but I don't want to be that controlling wife text him every hour asking him 20 questions and being nosey/worried. How can I handle this maturely?
I've talked it over with my husband and he reassured me everything will be okay and he voluntarily offered to tell me everything that happens tonight. I still don't feel any better though. I really some good advice not criticism telling me to get over it because unless you've been through truely fckd over by people you love and put your whole heart into, you have no idea how earth shattering it is and how hard it is to recover it.
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Life gets rocky for everyone. We all have to learn how to handle it on our own. Am I out of line for asking for help damn guys? All you self righteous fcks need to realize you were all young and trying to figure everything out just like ME. Offer some real advice yea?
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rowdy alpha male
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maybe he should quit his secure millitary job that pays good money because he has a shift with a girl. did u mean your insecure or immature. |
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upyourschet
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GROW UP!! You made a mistake when you married him because you are a bratty, whiney, little girl. Keep this crap up and you will be divorced in 1 year. cy |
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sqeker48
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Don't let your imagination run away w/you.
Anything COULD happen, but just because YOU think it could happen doesn't mean anyone else is thinking about doing it, right? |
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rohak1212
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Remind yourself that he is generally honest and has never given you cause to doubt his fidelity. Remind yourself that he is not the men from your past, he is your husband. Remind yourself how much you love him.
There's nothing you can do to change the fact of his job and the gender of his co-worker. So, quit worrying about that. I know, easier than it sounds. But you know deep down that you don't have anything to worry about. So don't worry about it.
If you really just have to do something, then do little things. Do nice things for your husband every once in a while. Nothing so big he notices a difference. Just keep that spark going, reminding him how much he likes having you around.
Good luck. |
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eddood52
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Get over it. He's in the military and in today's world you're going to have to learn to live with mixed genders working side-by-side. And on a weekend in a tech school environement, there's usually plenty going on around them to keep them both pretty busy with all the possible traffic in and out and shenanigans being pulled by young servicemen. Not much chance of any hanky panky there. |
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Danielle
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The thing about baggage is that it can truly harm your current relationship. It's kind of like a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you believe that your husband will cheat on you, you will constantly send him subtle clues to push him in that direction. It's like this husband and wife I once knew. He had been cheated on by all of his partners in the past. When he talked to his wife, he'd say things like "Everyone's cheated on me, so why wouldn't you" or "I know you'll cheat eventually". At one point, he set her up with a man to "test her" and sure enough, she cheated. He was so angry, but all I could do was look at him and tell him it was his fault.
In the end, you need to work through your own baggage- BY YOURSELF. This isn't an issue that belongs to your husband, it's yours. Seek out counselling because it can be a great help. |
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♥♥*¨¨*I am loved¨¨*:•♥♥.
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Just don't be surprise when he file for divorce and leave you for good
He is a man and your husband not your kid so grow up
you need to work on your insecurity and control habit before you ruin your own life
He was lying because that was what you wanted to hear so he lie to make you happy. |
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