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Mongo
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You did the right thing and he deserves to get it in spades.
It is natural to be nervous because you are blazing a new trail. |
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sueisdabest
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Good girl ... you've taken the first step to getting your life back!
You just have to try to be very brave & very strong. He's not going to like it but you have to stand firm or he will never back down against you. Not sure if you're in uk or usa but when I had problems like yours I called the police to tell them there may be a risk to me so they were aware, Then if you have to call them they know the history.
Just keep your chin up honey & be firm with him in speech & manner ..... I promise you, when you are over this you will feel liberated that you took a stand ..... you're worth it ! Good luck x |
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bring_it
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dont be scared. not sure why we get so scared of hurting people when truthfully they hurt themselves. he'll blame you for all this woes and anger and legal probs. but it wasn't YOU that "did" this, it was him. he'll never ever see that by being the kind of man he is, his life is what it is. do unto others as you have them do to you. well he did unto you and now he's getting what he did. just relax and thank God we live in a country that has a somewhat decent legal system! good luck and God bless!! |
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that1scott
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For starters, I would suggest seeing a therapist. An online forum is only a small way to get answers you want but probably will not get. Plus, it's not really the proper place for you to air out the type of dirty laundry that goes with divorce proceedings. If it helps any, a good rule of thumb is to give back just as much if not more than what you receive, and that goes for positive and negative things that happen in your life. |
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saylavie2u2
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Look at it from the standpoint that he's taken everything from you, so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain! The only way you're going to get over your fear of him is to stand up to him. |
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robbief1999
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What goes around, comes around. If he's getting a taste of his own medicine, then good. He sounds like a nasty piece of work. Don't be scared. If he threatens you or harms you in anway, report him to the police and he might go to jail. |
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Brainiac
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well, you're just standing up for yourself - which is more like it. How in the world did he take all that away from you? |
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richard_beckham2001
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Good on you, stay strong and good luck. |
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Common Sense
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During the legal process, he is under close scrutiny and
anything he does that is negative or threatening towards
you is to your benefit and his detriment ..
Make sure you report anything he does that is threatening. |
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SirSmartAzz
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Do you have a restraining order? and a good attorney?
Everything will be fine and you will be better off without him it is just going to take time effort and a some angst like you are enduring right now
Hang in there and tell your brother that blood is thicker then water and you need his support even if he may not agree with everything |
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Lyndsey b2b 150510
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my heart goes out to you, this must be an awful time for you.
but you have to stand tall, lift your chin and say this is what he deserves. dont let him make you feel bad, as you know he would do the same on you when the shoe is on the other foot.
Divorces are never easy and getting maintenance can be hell, but you need to stick to your guns.
get yourself a copy of I WILL SURVIVE, and sing while doing your house work, remember you deserve to be happy, and dont let anyone take that away from you!!!
No man is worth worrying over, chin up and stand tall just remember that! |
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FirefighterWife
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Be proud of yourself for sticking up for what you wanted. No one should have to be a doormat, keep your head up and know you are doing the right thing! |
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Bert
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Dont be affraid, if you are doing the right things, everything will work out, seek God and you shall find Him, He will give you all the strenght that you need, you will be fine......Jesus loves you |
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Lovelee
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are you involved in a church? churches have amazing support systems and people you can talk to, to maintain your mental health. Also if your ex were to get violent the churches always offer sanctuary for those who need it. my friend's ex lost his mind and threatened to kill her and their kids and the police couldn't do anything until he actually tried but her church family was so supportive and helped her "hide out" until he was no longer a threat. whether you are religious or not churches will help you. |
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rebel
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post his address |
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jim bob
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I'D be more then happy to calm you down "baby". |
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Frosty
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I'm so sorry to hear about the terrible stuff you've gone through.
Well done for picking up the peices, and getting your life back together. It must have taken a lot of courage. You just need to believe in yourself and know that you've probably been through the worst of it already.
Things will look up for you if you keep strong, always seek help if it gets too much.
Good luck, you deserve a fair divorce and don't let him bully you - he can't do it too you anymore, you're not together.
He can't hurt you anymore than he has.
p.s. I am assuming that he's terrifying you mentally rather than physically. If it is physical also then make sure you're surrounded by people or be somewhere where he can't find you.
good luck x |
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sarah louise m
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good 4 u dont give up.good luck |
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presleygirl
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calm down, he can't do anything to you. if you're that worried get a big dog, a german shepard will alarm you when anyone comes around--and you'll have time to call for help. |
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Rachel
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I hope you have at least one friend that you can count on. He sounds awful.
You are at the other side of a breakdown, this means you have strenth. You have more of it than you realise. Dont get preoccupied with his reaction, just get on and sort yourself and your life out. No matter what his reaction, do not get into an argument or get drawn into a tit for tat game.
Focus on your life not him. |
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lunatic
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He sounds like a very angry man and since it was he who got the house, maintained a friendship with all of your friends and even has your brother on his side, it is probable that he has a reason to be mad.
If you have reason to fear for your safety, get your lawyer to have the courts to issue a restraining order. |
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jamesdean2002uk
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what his full name and address i`l make the f@@@ker dissappear 4 u |
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jasmine
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it is natural to feel nervous be strong,gd luck. |
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celebrityhandbags
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Babe - you just took the FIRST step in regaining control of your life - you will get more confident so dont let fear stop you in your tracks...do you have a safe place to stay??? lock the doors - ask a good mate to come and stay with you for a week or two...there is always safety in numbers and they can assist in keeping a file of harrasment form your ex - they would be a witness for you.
Buy a telephone answering machine and NEVER pick up the phone till you know who it is - press record when you speak to him so you have a record of EVERY conversation - also then if he leaves any nasty messages you have a record of his behavious. If you can afford CCTV get one at least in the hall and link to your VCR - they cost peanuts fomr B&Q - get it facing the door so if he calls you can 'secretly' record what he says / does....girl - you gotta fight fire with fire. GOODLUCK XXX |
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BeanzMeanzMrBean
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Congratulations for your courage! Sadly, you are now entering a truly dangerous phase in your "relationship". Here come some ideas on how to be safe: go ex-directory right away in the phone book; change the lock on your door or even move house, especially if the two of you have a history of physical violence; make sure you know how to activate the emergency number(s) on your cell phone; always let one very trusted friend know where you're going and report in on a regular basis so she can raise the alarm for you if you can't; do NOT go for walks in the park or wood by yourself! |
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jillybird
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Have been through this with a friend; you need to protect yourself, ex d,phone and only let very close people have the number. Never answer the door unless you know who is there. don`t walk outside alone at night, if you have any fears you must phone the police. Any contact should be made with a third person present.
You can get through this, try not to let fear rule your life. One day this nightmare will be history and your life will be calm again. |
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banche
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Unless he has a violent past against you I wouldn't worry. Your just doing what you feel you need to do. He'll get over it...hopefully both of you will. |
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cardgirl2
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Beside the legal challange, what you must do is get an Order of Protection so that he has to stay away from you otherwise he will be arrested. It looks like he may be capable of violence. He is counting on you having trememdous fear, so don't let him get his way. Also if he calls you, try to tape his conversations, because if he threatens you on the phone, that is a federal crime. Isn't there someone who will stand by your side? Are you totally alone in this fight? What about your parents? Try to make contact with your brother, even though your ex has tried to alienate him from you. Blood is thicker than water, so try to make contact. Try to gather your strength through prayer because that is what your ex wants is for you to be in fear all the time. I know it is very difficult, but divorce proceedings can be very stressful, but in the end, I am sure if you have a good lawyer, you may be able to get what you are entitled to including part of the home and all back money he owes you. He will have to provide child support to you for the children, so he isn't going to get away with anything. I do wish you the best and never forget the power of prayer. It will give you strength. Also try to go and speak to your church pastor. Maybe he can help you. Your ex will get his just due believe me, what goes around, comes around. |
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