I am looking for relationship and family advice.?

I am a stay at home mother of 4. I feel so stuck at times. My husband works 45 hours a week or so. When he gets home he does what ever he wants he never helps me with the kids. I just feel like we are stuck in a rut. We never do anything any more. Not even with the kids all we do is stay home. I take care of the kids and he does things for everyone else.(HIS MOTHER) I am just looking for some advice on how to be more in love and have a better relation. Thanks
Additional Details
I would love to get a part time job. But the problem is I never know what time my husband is going to get home from work.

msdnmo

sit down with him (without the kids around) and talk to him. be open, honest and rational. don't get over emotional about it. let him know that it isn't that you just want help with the kids but that you want time with him. we all want (and need) to feel important to someone else. start with a date night for the two of you. let the kids stay with a sitter. do something the two of you enjoy. go to dinner and talk. don't do a movie because you can't connect in a movie. take the time to remember why the two of you got together. once you've reconnected with your husband you can involve the kids.

as for needing time away from the kids for yourself. i totally get that. try to start a co-op with other moms. each mom akes the kids for a morning a week. it's a trade off. or find support groups for mothers.

Jim E

The grass is always greener where you water it. I suggest you fight for your marriage. You both are probably neglecting to meet each others most important emotional needs. Recommmit yourself to your marriage covenant.

Eric E

why do you need to change if he is the one neglecting his family?

you need to tell himi you are feeling stuck. we have 3 kids, we both work and are exhausted when we get home, but we make sure to have family time with the kids and us. It is VERY important. Sure there ar times when I want to just sit and do nothing, but with kids you need to interract. he should also be giving you a break from time to time to go get nails done, massage or just go to the store by yourself. You need alone time so you dont go CRAZY!

I would mention to him that you need him to help out some.

bayou_babe1111

tell him you've got to start having some time away from the house & kids or your gonna go insane. tell him your hiring a babysitter to come every thursday for instance from this time to this time & do something for yourself. not grocery shopping or anything else, something that is just for you - whatever you enjoy. trust me, its a lifesaver - you'll have a whole new attitude! good luck!

SHMILY

I would sit down and talk to him about this. Tell him how you feel. And then remind him that you need stuff done around here as well. Yep they always going running to their mommy's don't they!!

Katie M

Talk to your husband about your feelings. Plan a "date night" once a week. Get a babysitter (friend or family if you can't afford one) and do something fun without the kids. The children will see it's important for their mom and dad to spend time alone and it should become routine.
My husband and I started this once his son moved in. We were so overwhelmed and knew we had to carve the time out for ourselves if we were going to make it work.

Mean Carleen

Find a part time job

NONAME

you get a job. sell the house and pay off all your bills. start over again.

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