I feel i am hopeless and bad person. how can i change to a good person?

Helen E

It is only natural for you to feel threatened and jealous of this other woman. I've been with my boyfriend for five years and I still feel threatened by his ex-girlfriends even though he hasn't seen them since before we got together. YOU ARE NOT A BAD PERSON BECAUSE OF THIS. She probably is a nice person, she's done nothing wrong, but NEITHER HAVE YOU.
You are in a violent relationship. If someone who is supposed to love you hits you then that is wrong. This is something that is difficult to accept but you need to realise it. I'll bet anything he started by pushing you, then he hit you and said it was a mistake. I know how it starts because I've been there.
Your husband is being completely out of order. He should not be telling you she's better than you. He should not be hutting you. No wonder you feel like you're suffering. He's being a complete idiot.

It seems to me that he married you to please his parents. And now its not working out. He might resent you for it which is why he's treating you like this, but none of it is your fault.

You don't talk about love in your question. Did you realise that? You posted a question about your marriage but didn't even mention the word.

Your marriage is not working. He will jut keep on hurting you physically and mentally. You have done nothing wrong, and so you can't change to being a good person. You already are. Get out of there. Your family might not like it, but wht is more important: your life, your health and your sanity or your parents being happy?

Good luck. If you want support from someone who's been there message me.

Cutedervish

Don't suffer. You are what you are, and she is what she is. Nothing complicated. The problems start when you are trying to intervene with the way things are, or at least meant to be. As human beings, we all have the good and the bad in us. In fact many times the two intertwine and exchange, so things are much more complicated. Just know yourself, and you will be able to evade problems with other people pushing you into some kind of a box.

largepepperonipizzawithbacon

what kinda man is he? still a mama's boy wtf? tell him to grow some balls! even romeo got the balls to run away and get it on with juliet. if he had made the decision to stick with u... then she should let his past go and focus on u. and if he keeps on comparing u with her... then he's a douche.... u deserve someone who treats u better and see u as who u r. Everyone is different! Effing douche. sorry... some ppl just pisses me off

zandra

what the hell get out of that marriage

Boo

If he abuses you both mentally and physically he does not love you!

mrs_G

Your relationship would benefit from some marriage counseling. If he refuses to go, then go alone.

Mohamed D

gaining is your magic word, gain self esteem,gain your Hus.love by showing him love ,care ,tenderness, be his home,gain self-confidence show him that you are the right decision(don't gain weight).

Sam

It is not you it is your husband he should never had married if he loved another you are not a bad person for this.You are just in a bad marriage I suggest counseling and if that does not help get a divorce you can;t make him love you if he does not.

apple guava

I think some people speak more directly in anger but not necessarily the entire truth. People say all sorts of highly biased things in rage because that's when they are not thinking straight. There may be some truth in what he says in anger but that's not the whole picture. There are still lots unsaid. Ultimately he chose you over her.

Sparkles

Please, do not take the blame on yourself and consider yourself as a bad person, because none of this is your fault.
It seems that your husband is still in love with another woman, and isn't giving you the love a husband should give you. I would also suggest that you don't start to fight. Maybe you should try sitting him down and having a quiet chat about how you feel? If you start to fight he will not hear you. Tell him that you're sorry that things didn't work out the way he wanted, but since he already is in a situation where he is, why not try to make things better for you and for himself?
But please make sure that you do not start shouting at him.
It's advisable too if you can get somebody trustworthy into this, if they are willing to help out.
If nothing works and he still loves another woman, then get separated from him.

The Trickster

Answer my question please

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ArOFOv8ufVIEhpAT9rvXEGQgBgx.;_ylv=3?qid=20090420073220AACraXU

You should get out if you can from your relationship never let a man beat you

Tim

You are a head case... Seek professional mental help..

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