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Sincere
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before you do anything...calm down.
don't act on anything right now. just let it sit for a minute. we make our biggest mistakes while we're angry. after you've calmed down, analyze the situation. you know your husband better than anyone. has anything been out of the ordinary lately? have you had problems like this before? you've been married how long? thirty something years?
don't throw away your marriage over some little silly, immature gesture. you know how evil and conniving some people can be. if she was going to come at you like that, she should have at least sent proof. don't be so quick to let this person come between you and your husband. but don't be a fool either. |
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Hoping he will bless me with #1
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Something is going on. I mean, that would be my first thought anyway. People just don't up and do things like that without cause. Yes, it could be a jealous ex (since you said the card is from a "true friend"). You can't just jump to conclusions right away, but you have to think long and hard about something like this. If he denies it, then you can't make him tell the truth or make anything out of it. But just don't believe every word he says. Men lie. Women lie for that matter. But men know how to manipulate your mind and get you so confused that you don't know what to believe. Go with your first mind and don't be a fool. |
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Penny's from Heaven
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Do you think that he's cheating? Typically, women know (gut feeling) when they have a cheating spouse and the hubby rarely admits to it. If you think so, confront him again and take the card with you. If he denies it again, I would confront the friend. See if you can get the name of the mistress and then confront her.
For your own well-being, it is best that you know if he is cheating one way or the other. If he is cheating, your health is at risk since you don't know what this other woman has or what she could have passed on to you through him. |
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Quasimodo
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Consider the card from a 'true friend' nothing but trouble. If this 'true friend' was in fact one than they'd tell you this to your face and not send little notes anonymously in the mail.
Unless you have reason to believe otherwise forget it. In fact I'd be more concerned who'd do such a thing to you. |
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Li
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keep at him, he will come clean. |
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Sexyeyes
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go to the "friend" and the lady......find out for yourself |
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RAINBOW
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no smoke without fire! ask him again for the truth good luck blessings |
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Random_Girl
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Yikes ... look into it as seriously and carefully as you're able. |
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natty
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Why would a true friend send you a card saying that???!!!
If it was a true friend they would tell you to your face! |
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?
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It may have been sent by someone who does not want to be brought into this battle, but someone who cares about you and your feelings and wants you to know the truth. There is a possibility that it could even be sent by the other woman.
I would consider this card to be painfully true. I would start making plans on your future, because if the woman is pregnant your soon to be ex will most likely move in with her and leave you, be prepared. |
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Latino Heat 4ever
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First off, a true friend would tell you face to face. This card is from the other woman bringing it to your attention...she wants you to think it's from a friend. What she is really doing is just trying to get you to leave your husband so she can be with him. As for her being pregnant.....this is something that will come out in time. Yes, 9 months is a long time to wait for something like this, but you will know b/c of a DNA test. If the child is his...then I would recomend getting some form of counseling for you or as a couple if you are willing to stick it out with your husband. This is a true test of your marriage....he has betrayed you in the worst way...( trust me, I know all to well how you feel right now) and you just want to die. Your husband is not going to admit to having an affair with this woman b/c when it comes to adultry, a woman can take her husband for everything and he is not going to want his dirty laundry in public for friends and family to know. You need to confront this woman and find out if there is anyway she can prove the affair...besides the fact she is pregnant. |
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conny
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I am so sorry!!!! He is lying and I sure wouldn't believe him.
Sorry!!! |
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Leaf
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Track this woman down and ask HER. I'll bet that she'll be honest. Also, find out how your friend knows. Did she see him? Did she hear about it? Does she know this woman? Get all of the facts. |
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mt75689
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I know this is something that is really hard for you to simply dismiss, and you'll probably be wondering if the accusations are true for the rest of your life.
You just want peace of mind and you're not finding any.
Hire a private investigator. Get your questions answered and then get on with your life. |
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jas h
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well, sorry to hear that find the woman make sure she 's telling the true and move on donn' t stay there to long cost sometime is not worst it? to deal with a unfaithfull men. |
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aangie781
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32 years is along time has your hubby ever gave you and signs he may be cheating?if it was me i would find out who sent this letter because a true friend would not send you a letter they would tell you to your face with all the proof that you needed to know for certain that he was cheating.it could be a friend that has the hots for your hubby or a jealous co worker or something or just someone trying to cause turnoil.if he has given you no reason to think hes cheating i would disregard it if he has then i would keep eyes and ears open because the truth will eventually come out.if hes cheating you will know just by how he acts with you or if theres mysterious business trips or phone calls |
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gorgeousfluffpot
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Well it could be motivated by jealousy.. You have a good life and there are probably plenty of miserable people who would like to see you in the same boat.
Or it is true but there's little way you can prove this, short of getting a detective agency on to your husband.
Your husband denies it but you can probably tell, from his mood and expression, whether he is lying. What do you feel in your heart?
There's no way he can prove that it's a lie, is there? So if you believe in your heart that he is telling the truth, I would destroy this letter and forget about it. If, however, some instinct is telling you that it might be true then, regrettably, you may want to follow this up with a detective agency.
But if you have a happy marriage and life is good between you, why rock the boat? Least said, soonest mended and all that .... before you got the note your marriage was sound and you had no worries. Don't let a mischief-maker ruin all this for you. |
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FlyingScooter
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Burn it.
Anyone that wants to be taken seriously would put their name on it. True Friend, how much more high school can you get?
It was probably written by some woman that wants your man and will try to bust up your marriage with him by creating suspicion.
She's probably just another candidate for a HomeWrecker World Tour 2008 t-shirt. (back of t-shirt reads:) Your Husband may be Next! |
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redpeach_mi
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honestly, if your hubby is having an affair, he has a reason to lie to you. the person who sent the card has no reason. however, you really have no reason not to trust him until you can find out proof for yourself. hire someone to follow him. i have anonymously told a friend that her soon to be hubby was cheating on her. she didn't believe and still married the guy. |
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littleluvkitty
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if he denies it then it may not be true. if he was having an affair don't you think that you would know. if you think that its at all possible then if i were you i would find out. watch him and see where he goes and what he does when he thinks you are not looking. you will find out soon enough. if not if you don't want to know then just let sleeping dogs lie. good luck . |
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Jeff G
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Hire a PI within a week you'll know for sure. |
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The Bear
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Wow, whoever sent that really wants to hurt you and/or your husband. A "true friend" would identify themself or have given you something concrete. I would take a good look at who wants to hurt either or both of you.
If you have been married this many years you would have concrete reason/s to know or suspected before this letter.
There are some screwed up truly evil people out there. Don't give this evil the credibility or power over you it wants. |
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mah0375
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I would want to find out the truth. I think there must be something for this "friend" to send you that card. |
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U is for Uranium
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True friends send things (especially like this) anonymously so you get the correct information without bringing themselves into the equation and putting themselves in the middle of it. They should have given you enough information to verify. Go and see the women who is suppose to be pregnant.
Think about it. You could send these all day to people you hate, and make their lives miserable for the fun of it...but you don't? Why? Because it's a waste of time. Someone who took the time, knows something they thought you should know. They figured you've been on the bench so long, it's time to put you in the game to make the playing field level.
More times than not, these are not hoaxes, unless you have demented friends. |
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justaskin
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I call Bull |
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*Moni* VOTE 08!
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Do you know who this "true friend" is? If so, talk to her face to face. Otherwise, I wouldn't believe it. |
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Toni B
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Ask yourself a few key questions BEFORE you toss 32 years out the window.
1. Did he have periods of absence from you other than work?
2. When you asked where he's been during these periods of absence, did he get angry and try to start an argument?
3. How often does he go out with his "boys" and not check in?
4. Have you had trouble with him cheating before?
5. Any particular friend or relative(yes, relative) that takes an unusually vested interest in your marriage??
6. Most importantly of all, ARE YOU HAPPY IN YOUR MARRIAGE TO THIS MAN? A yes will apply to this one.
If you can honestly answer these questions with " No's ", then you should have no worries. BUT, if you have at least 2 of these that you are positive about, then you should proceed with your investigation. Opposition always comes to those who are doing the right thing. I hope for your sake that this is all a lie and you can get back to your marriage. |
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The Guru
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What a horrible situation. If the message is a lie then someone really is very sick( if its a joke) or really wants to hurt you. Every other bit advise given so far is relevant but its going to be you who lives with the consequences what ever you decide. I think you need to discuss the whole issue out with your husband with a counselor. Assuming hes telling the truth the damage to trust needs to be fixed first. If he is not then perhaps professional counseling will provide a "safe place" for him to come clean |
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huny
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Have there been any other signs to make you sus. This could just be some jealous b**ch who knows what you have and wants it for herself. You have made a success of your live and are happy in your life and some people cannot help but be miserable and try to wreck it all. Chin up my dear. You have more that a lot of people and this could quite well be someone just trying to cause trouble. You should be proud of what you have achieved and hope this comes to nothing. Fingers crossed for you. |
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