I have a very important question and I only want mature answers?

G. M.

Take care of the children

Violet Pearl

Would it be more wrong to allow children to suffer? You should get custody if you/husband can afford to raise them.

kal0603

It definately appears that your sister has many demons she needs to deal with. If you are willing and able to take custody of your nieces and nephews - DO IT. If what your niece is telling you is true they need to be removed from that situation IMMEDIATELY. I wish you the best of luck

Joey K

Don't think about your sister- she's not thinking of her kids.

s p

no!!! get those kids away from the problems.. can you adopt them? if you cant then call childrens service....dont tell your sister its you if shell get mad....but get those kids away from danger...how can you listen to them crying and not help? call CPS.....or even ploice in her area and ask them what to do....help those kids!!!

wilhelmenawiem

Like the old song says,"If this is wrong, I don't want to be right". Dear, you are doing exactly the best thing for these kids. Your sister, for whatever reason, does not know the first thing about responsibility and parenting. Your heart is smack dab in the right place, and apparently, so is your head. You did and are doing the right thing. I hope that everything good comes your way because you deserve it. And when these kids are finally able to be with you, and find out what a "mom and dad" truly are, your heart will burst. Bravo.

brookesingsalways

I dont think this is wrong at all. It shows that you have a heart and are willing to open your home to children who need you know. These children need to be with family that loves them and can give them the educations and upbringing they so need and probably are craving. Please persue this. Your sister made her mistakes and now she will have to live with them. Dont worry about her she is grown. Do everything in your power to help these children before theu become another static in our society. God bless you and I will pray for you

bats_fanfilm

Are you listening to me? You ask if it's wrong for you to do it to your sister, yes? Here's my answer:

NOT AT ALL.

Your sister is in the wrong for being an irresponsible sl*t for not bieng able to support herself, and even moreso for bringing FIVE children into the world (with a different father for each one, I'm assuming?) who she obviously doesn't care about, or she would put them into The System herself. Do what you need to do. It may be hard, but the right thing to do was NEVER the easy thing to do.

bellegurl17

Whether it's wrong for your sister is not the issue. The question is is it right for the kids? I think that you are doing the right thing. Have you already alerted the authorities about the beatings? You are showing that you could care for your sister's kids far better than anyone. I think you should go for it, and the best of luck to you. Your sister should get down on her knees and thank you for what you are going to do.

May_May

Absolutely not. You should do what is in the best interest of these children. Someone needs to because she is obviously not. I would call and tell them what is going on. you do not want something bad to happen to them and that be laying on your conscience.

Smartassawhip

It would not be wrong for you to get custody of your sister's children and raise them. You would be saving your nieces and nephews lives. Your sister might get angry at you for this but so what? Her children's lives are more important than whether your sister feels angry or not.

God bless you for what you are doing.

~just_jd~

if she is not taking care of the childern , you are doing what is best. but if you can't get to them in time , when child welfare takes them they will become childern of the state and that is when you will have problems.

RIPPED

Do what you know is right!!!!Don't worry about what your sister thinks.These kids are crying out to you for help.They are a blessing

Lovebug123

Fair for your sister isn't the question, is it fair for the kids, I would say yes. They need to eat, and have clothes. If she cannot provide what the kids need then put them where someone can. But, if I were you, I would give her a warning first, tell her if she doesn't straighten up that you are going to call the child protective services. Understand that more than likely, if you put them through the system they are going to get split up, and with a mother like they have, they probably are tight, that's going to break their hearts. So, if you are going to go through with it, I hope you consider taking in your own family.

jom

No, this is not wrong. You should intervene on the children's behalf because it seems as if they are reaching out to you. These children are very vulnerable and, if you do not help, who will? They need stability. I hope you do the right thing. The situation needs a proper investigation.

bigdogrex

i can say take the kids they are they are the ones hurting an have the police to put those sorry *** people who are keeping them in jail for child abuse

just a mommy

those kids did not ask to be born into a life of hell....if i was you i would want to give those kids a fighting chance to have a normal life...... do what is in your heart no-one can tell you to do it or not but those kids sound like they would be better off with you

june clever

You are not doing anything to your sister but helping her preserve what she has. These children need someone like you to look after them. God help the person that hurts them.. I think it is so admirable of you to step up to the plate. These children need their aunt. If you talked it over with your husband and he agrees, please do something for these poor children. Your sister is in an awful place right now, perhaps later she will understand what she has done. If your husband agrees to help these kids, God bless you both. These children are your blood, they need all the help they can get, they never asked to be born, please do what you can do, I know it will be hard for you, but, eventually your family can be put back together through your efforts.

Panda

Yes most defiantly get involved.those children need YOU.because you are family and you love them.If you work the system right you can get custody of those children.you need proof of abuse some how to get them.If your sister is a hoe then she should not get them back.I think you should fight for them with everything that you have. I hope i have helped you. God Bless!

lyn

YOUR A GOOD AUNT. SOMEONE NEEDS TO BE THERE FOR THE KIDS. YES, THEY NEED YOUR HELP TO GET THEM AWAY FROM THEIR MOTHER AND BE PLACED EITHER FOR FOSTER CARE OR TO BE ADOPTED. DON'T WORRY IF YOU CAN'T TAKE THEM IN. YOU CAN ONLY DO SO MUCH. PLEASE TRY TO KEEP IN CONTACT WITH THEM. GOOD LUCK TO ALL.

marlene

no it's not the wrong thing to do because u sound like u care about these children alot and if she's not doing anything about what is happing to HER children then that means it's the right thing.her lost.

lady97bird

i think action needs to be taken asap if they are being abused they didn't ask to be brought here and they are to young to take care of themselves.your sister needs a reality check call and report it to whomever this has to stop. if the 9 year old called you and told you about the situation she did her part and reached out to someone she knew would listen(you)she is obviously depending on you to help her and her siblings.good luck.

Hollynfaith

Honey, as a social worker, a mother of five and a brother and sister in law with the same issues (Hubby's side of the family), I not only feel your pain but I understand. Because I work in the system and I have great friends, I didn't have to turn them in, but I did manage to get them court orded parenting classes as well as have home visits three times a week. Lucky for me, they live in the same town so I get to take the babies quite often too (they are 2, and 2 mos.). You are in a different situation. But it's not one without resolution. There is a way for you to obtain those children now, it's just going to take the cutting of some red tape. As parents, prior to the divorce, they can dictate where the children should reside. If they are both in agreement, it can be done and will be ordered. However, I don't think your sister is being quite honest with you. Chances are, she's using them as a meal ticket and has no intentions of changing their situation. Which leaves you with one of two options. One, you can consult with their father and explain what is going on, hopin to gain his sympathy, and allow the move to take place, or two, you can call social services in her area and talk with a social worker. Explain your intent from the very beginning, then go into your sister's history, and then go into the welfare of the children. This way she'll work with you and advise you of the laws in that state. If you just call to make a report, those children are going to be removed, possibly split up and who knows what happens next. Social services would rather place the children with a loving family member before they go to foster care...even if you are far away. It's easier on the kids, the parents can still visit and the family unit remains a family unit. Once they go into the system, it's hard to get them out. Until it's done, call your neice often, stay on your sister's good side, and get the help of a social worker in your sister's state to help you...that's what we are there for...to help when we can. I can't see them turning their back on you in a situation like this. I wish you the best of luck and God Bless you for your willingness to take on such a huge responsibility.

Sparkles

The question here is it wrong for your sister to be allowing this to happen to her children. You are a wonderful person to consider doing this for the five children. You will be blessed, and they will be blessed to have you and your husband to love and care for them. As for you sister? What has she ever done to provide for them? Nothing, and they have known nothing but abuse. I would worry about the 5 little lives that are counting on someone that loves them and would help them. She has made her decision which she wanted to choose, and it wasn`t her children. I wouldn`t worry about what she thinks. She might straighten up for a little while, but she would be right back where she is now, and so would her five children. As one answer said, becareful letting them go into the system. It will become a nightmare for the kids.

Singinganddancing

Your desire to help the children by taking them is not wrong. They are already "in the system," and if the oldest says they are being beaten and don't have enough to eat, you should call the child abuse hotline immediately.

When children need to go into foster care, children's services generally look for family members who can take the kids first. Of course, if you're in another state, they would weigh whether or not the kids need a short term or long term placement, and would only send them to you if they needed a long term placement. Sounds like that's where you're at.

I'm glad you and your husband want to do this, but it is an absolutely huge job. You are not betraying your sister in any way by wanting to provide stability to her children; if she thinks you are than she is not mature enough herself to be a parent. If I couldn't afford a home for a while I would kiss the feet of either of my siblings who would offer to take my kids, knowing how uncertain foster care is. Sounds like your sister has bipolar disorder or something like that.

I hope you can get the kids and that you have the easiest possible experience with the whole thing. Blessings on you and your husband.

NEW ADDITION: Your added info is interesting. It sounds fishy... kids can't leave the state until the divorce is final? If they're not living with a parent (which is the usual reason) then WHY? And they're "not yet in the system"? Are they in county-monitored fostercare, or not? Are they just staying with your sister's friends? If they're in real fostercare, then they are in the system already. And if they're staying with your sister's friends (or her husband's friends, or whatever), then they are NOT being monitored, heaven knows what could be happening to these kids and someone should call the child abuse hotline right away.

I'm with Wendytyo, don't make your sister feel bad about her inability to provide a stable home right now, but don't put the kids' need to be safe second to her need to feel okay. That's just backward and wrong.

LIllie

You go get Those kids "auntie"!!!!! It might be tough at first but you can do this. Hire a lawyer so you can make sure that you don't leave any loop holes open for your sister to get them back. And definitely do not be afraid of her Crap- you do have her best interest at heart as well but shes to screwed up to realize it right now. You and your husband are saving angles. I have faith in both of you and I don't even know you or him. Gods speed to you both and your nieces and nephews they have a wonderful future a head of them and no more suffering.

Suresh s

hi gentle lady,

try to find a care-taking home (genuine homes,ok) for the kids and put them there...keep in touch with them almost everyday.....kepping the kids with you is not advisable, as u ve got married....initially u or ur betterhalf may feel comfotable, but, take it from me, it will creat pblms between u both...i'm telling you the practical possibilities which v come across in our society...so, to wind up, put them at home, bring them on special days like birhtdays, festivals bla bla bla....ok...be practical rather being so sentimental.....all the best...

brown sugar

Is your husband in agreement with you on the custody thing-those are your sisters kids do the best that you can to help them but why should you put your life on hold for your sister-you have to think about what you and your husband want out of life-do you want to be saddle down with your sisters kids and put yours and your husband life on hold while she enjoy herself.those are her kids not yours-God Bless you for wanting to do that for your blood if she put them into the system she will have to pay for that and not you-kids don't forget-help them as much as you can and stop there-she will pay-taking the kids could have a very bad effect on your marriage-so watch out-think-take a good look-because you will have a problem with your sister if you have the kids because she will be at your door all of the time saying that those are my kids and making your life miserable

jaimestar64cross

Do what's in the best interest of the children --- they need family that loves them and places their needs ahead of their own.

wendytyo

why don't you see if your sister will let you keep the children until she gets her life together don't make her feel like a bad mother that will just make things worse just tell her i know you are having a hard time right now and I would like to take the children until you get on your feet and get your life together I want to do anything i can to help you and the kids. maybe she will go for that and you won't even have to go threw the court system only bad part is she can come and take them back at anytime then you would have to go to court and fight for custody.

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