I know I shouldn't be upset but I can't help it?

April

Nah,,,, it takes a lot more than that to get me upset. If he didn't like the pancakes, I wouldn't make them again, and I'd have already figured it out that the Itunes were already available. Next year, ask him what he wants, then get that. If he says "nothing" then get him nothing, just as he requested..... just a nice card.... $1.25. Don't hold a grudge, he has no idea what he did wrong, if anything..... Two things really kill a marriage---resentment and betrayal. remember that

ppv918

You already have given his present. Is the thought that counts. The caring you took to make sure his day started out right shows how much you care for him. Tonight do something and give him something that NO ONE can give him. Make it special ... a night to remember. Good Luck

mcdannells

Sure this would hurt anyones feelings I would think. You did the best you could. Hopefully he realizes this.....You get to go to dinner to right? Make the best of his day.
Have fun at dinner.

NeXuS

I think if u take him to one side, give him a peck on the cheek, and tell him that you're a bit upset that you feel you didnt make his day as special as you would have liked, (give the reasons why) and tell him that you love him. Thats all he's wanting to hear. I think it's sweet what you've done actually

THE SINGER

I would probably be upset...first. Then after I thought about it, I'd change my attitude because it is HIS birthday. What you could have done was 'coordinate" your efforts perhaps with his mom and you would have avoided the cake issue. But you know what, hind site is 20-20 they say. You could have played a game of scavenger hunt with him. You could have little cards all over the house telling him to do or get certain things and then top it off with something extra special between the two of you. Don't feel badly. Just start thinking on another level. (you could have asked your Yahoo friends for ideas - smile) What special did you do to the pancakes? Did you dress up the plate - put out the good silver? Real napkins - could have made a paper crown and placed it on his head - with a card saying 'whatever he wanted for the day was his and you were the only one who could grant him every request." I mean, there was a lot you could have done. But dont' sweat it. Talk to him later, softly and lovingly when you're alone and let him know how special he is to you - and that you wanted to do more for his birthday. Hold his hands, look into his eyes - and let nature take its course. He probably didn't give it a thought. Women are the only ones who trip for a year over something like this. "man up" (smile) At least you have a fiance' (smile)

hockeylova#1

the best thing you can give him for his birthday is love and affection!

NoTurningBackNow

Honestly, I would be a little upset too. I think you really tried to make his day special and it just feels like your efforts went unappreciated.

The cake thing would really burn me....

you have a right to be upset but just be happy for him today.. you can tell him how you felt tomorow.. at least be happt for him today...

rach

id b devastated :( say t him that your really sorry that his bday wasnt as special as you'd tried to make it and you'll make it up to him sometime :) explain what you wanted (to make him happy) but it didn't turn out the way you expected it to...and tell him that you love him (jus cos its nice to hear it)

just_loni

you've a right to have your feelings hurt and I would suggest that you talk to him after the fact and let him know how you feel. this is one of those things that if not brought out it could be a repetitive issue through out your marriage. He needs to know how much it means to you to now be the one who makes his birthdays special. mommy already had her turn.

earthling

Yes, I think that you have a right to be upset; however, did your fiance know that you were going to make him his favorite dinner and get him a cake? If he did not know, this really isn't his fault; however, if he did know, he should have told his mother what you were going to do and asked her if you all could go out to dinner on another night. I'm sorry that you have had such a bad day.

shoe

you totally have a reason to be upset
you tried as hard as you could and it didn't work out like you wanted it to
i'm sure he appreciated it though:)

robpone

Yes bI would sweety but u can still give him somethin special . . . . tonite when u all go to bed give him the best head he's ever had , hE'LL NEVER FORGET THAT !

nkia21

im sorry. yes i would be sooo hurt but you cant do anything about it.

miss_lady404

Yes, I would be upset. It's okay to be upset about this. You put thought, effort, love and care into this day for him. Be proud of yourself, it wasn't your fault that things didn't go quite right. I can't help it when my feelings are hurt and I'm sure you can't either.

Lin S.

Of course we would be upset!!! But don't be too hard on yourself... not usually goes as planned. You had very good intentions and tried very hard to make it special. You could be beating yourself up and worrying over nothing. Guys are usually that emotional about that kind of stuff!

Susan M

No expectations,,,,No disappointments.

laura k

I would be sad too :( But you know what I would ask your bf if he would just want to be with you tonight. His family could wait until tommorow. I know that if this were reversed I would want to be with my boyfriend, he'd come first. But thats just me. Good Luck

jandracu

It is ok, really. Ask him what he wants and tell him that you will give it to him when you get paid again.

Tones

I think you are the classic queen bee female personality. You have no reason to be upset, but you creatively come up with problems.

Just smile and have fun with your bf. I mean, if I were your bf, I wouldn't want your difficulty in imperfection to ruin my special day. Just kiss him and make his day easy.

Personally, I think you should be that way all the time unless he really does something careless like insult you for no reason, hit you, insult your family, break things, or randomly runs over cats.

Save your emotions for something real damaging.

Don't let little, petty things turn your beautiful world into a firey hell.

You're too pretty to be so upset so easily. OK? Promise me to tone it down a bit?

Mommy-To-Be

I can understand why you are upset... I know I would be feeling the very same way. It wasn't fair of your boyfriend to act that way towards you... just one thing.. did you know he downloaded music for free off the internet? If so, the blame is on you for the iTunes card, you could've used the $50 for something else to get him. As for dinner with his mom and a cake... thats just not fair to you. I would say something, regardless of its his birthday or not. Don't let him walk on you. I've been there.. its not healthy.

jude

his mom had no idea u had planned a dinner also, your too sensitive honey, no i would not be upset, but than i am older and wiser and been there and done that, and these are just little things, that don't matter. don't get upset till he is cheating, and leaving u, than u really got something to be hurt about. it is your job to make him happy but don't go overboard, or get upset over his mom, as she is going to be in his life, no matter what. u just have to share him with her.

F. Perdurabo

It's not your job to make him happy. It's not his job to make you happy. Marriage is give and take. He should be doing as many, if not more, things for you than you do for him.

I think that was a bit rude of him to be honest. I don't care if my wife bought me a tin of Altoids for the holidays. I would tell her it is the best gift I've ever received and I'd tell her why. He needs a good swift kick in the butt. He needs to be taking better care of you.

Don't be a doormat. This isn't the fifties.

FP

clueless_nerd

You certainly have the right to be upset. Not at him or his mom (they didn't do anything wrong) but frustrated that you tried to do something special and it didn't turn out the way you wanted.

And that's what you should talk to him about and tell him. Just in those words. "I wanted to do something really special for you but it didn't turn out the way I wanted. I feel really frustrated".

And then he will see what you did not as an extra cake and a gift card he didn't need but as a lot of work on your part to make the day special.

And that's the best gift a guy could receive.

beygrl

Your right, today is not the right time to let him know you are upset. Because you will come out wrong, but find the right time and let him know how you felt. Trust me, talking from experience you should never let the little things like this just fly and pretend its not a problem, because later on they become even bigger things and you just dont know how to deal with it anymore. If you want a happy marriage, dont fool yourself into thinking things will turn out fine on there own. You have to make it fine for yourself, always remember that, and tell him although his mom might have his best interest at heart, she should maybe check the day before to see if you guys dont have plans before she makes some of her own. Never go silent and hold it in, a lesson learned the hard way.....

jen

you said it right that your job is to make him happy bc you what him to make you happy. if he is happy doing what ever he did on his birthday your job is done. if it was your birthday and you had a option to go out to eat or stay home you would want to go out you can always stay at home. here is the plus your man is happy and you don't have to spend any money

Judge Judy of Y/A

Maybe you can make him his special dinner tomorrow night and explain that you planned to do that on his birthday but then the plans got changed at the last minute when his mom wanted to take him out to dinner. It's the thought that counts and what you planned was really sweet. It's understandable that you're feeling the way you do.

jst_lv_me_alone

Yeah I'd be upset!! Once his bday passes i would tell him about it to. And did his mom know that you were planning something special? sometimes men dont exactly tell their parents whats going on (no offense guys...)........ sorry it turned out crappy - at least you remembered his birthday!! :)

shorty

Sure I can understand that your feelings were hurt but it sounds like you 2 are going to have a great dinner anyway. And sounds like you put alot of thought into his day, so try not to let it get you down. Seems like your a very special girlfriend and im sure he apprecaites you more then he lets on

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