I need some inlaw advise big time not really sure what to do with them......?
Find answers to your legal question.
I need some inlaw advise big time not really sure what to do with them......?
|
Ok me and my wife got married back in march and well ever since I have known my wife her parents have given my sh.it and well I am fed up with it….. We were at my wife’s parents house for Easter dinner and her dad goes off on me saying that I am no good for his daughter and that I am a mistake and that he wish’s I would just kill myself and that since I was abused bye my parents I am no good and since I have epilepsy that I don’t deserve to be happy or anything(I have really bad depression and I also have Epilepsy so its just idk…..) and I am shocked as hell to this although he has told me these things before but never in front of my wife……… because I just got a great Dane puppy before the wedding and everyone was over at our apartment visiting and stuff and well he kicked my dog because he wanted attention….. I mean I have just had it I am so fed up with them…. Me and my wife bought a home in Denver and her parents are following us there wtf….. My wife is also pregnant with twins and she is due on august 13th but I am just lost on what to do with them…… I mean I am at the point were I don’t want my kids near these people when they are born they are so vindictive and spiteful and hateful towards me….. Any advise is welcome....My wife was horrified with it all I left the room and went and cried…. And I don’t cry easily but that made me cry and she started chewing her dad out about it and she came and comforted me and we left and went home and when he kicked my dog ummm that did not go so well she got in the middle of me and him because I was ready to kill him and well she has always defended me against them its just idk what it is anymore but she is not speaking to her parents right now after all of this me and my wife have been dateing since we were in our teens we are going on 12 years togeather...... i treat my wife like gold and you could as her that and she would say it was true i always have respected her parents and we were engaged for a year before getting married just an fyi
|
 
|
wheelsofmadness
|
wow just off the top of my head I would say that her dad has some real big issues and needs to seek therapy. I have a mother in law who when invited to our wedding told my wife that they would come if nothing better came up. ( my in laws live about 125 miles from us) that comment went over like a lead balloon with my wife. Needless to say they didn't come to the wedding. We haven't spoken to her parents since, which makes for some rather uncomfortable holidays. (over 2 years now.)
Since your wife is aware of how her father has spoken and treated you. I think she would be understanding to the point when ever you have a family event or holiday you would prefer not to attend. But allow her to if she so desires. If I were in your position I would sit down with your wife and calmly talk the whole situation over tell her how you feel and that you do not wish for your kids to be around this. ( she will probably disagree since they are grandparents) but don't freak out at that point. all you can really do is avoid them/him. If you really feel so strong that you won't be around him don't invite him over to your home and tell him he is not welcome until he respects you and your family enough to keep his opinions to himself. But if your wife feels like she should take the kids to see them I wouldn't stand in the way.
Remember you are married to his daughter and you shouldn't bash him in front of her either. respecting her enough to tell her how you feel and leaving it at that is all that needs to be done.
My former father in-law and I didn't see eye to eye and we had a few verbal arguments to the point that it was almost a battle of wills. But when it came to the kids we set our feelings aside and acted amicable towards each other.
I would make it clear with your in-laws that no matter what they think of you. they do not have to live with you. and you and your wife are adults too and deserve to be treated as such.
you do not have to make it a battle. |
|
daisy322_98
 |
Hateful people are just going to be hateful. Your inlaws are not going to change. What you need to do is be the better man and not react. The best way to make someone feel like an idiot is by not trying. My husband is a soldier. Him and the other high ranking soldiers are very good at making others feel like idiots just by a look. Look amused when he says this to you or just smile and say maybe to him. Do not let him identify who you are. |
|
Chopsmom
 |
Wow......so obviously your wife came from a very abusive homelife. I would suggest that you guys work out some type of arrangement where your wife can see her family, if she so chooses WITHOUT you being present.
Over time I think you need to get your wife some counseling about all of this....this is totally not healthy and your wife should cut her parent off from her life until such time as they can conduct themselves in an appropriate AND RESPECTFUL manner.
Again....I would not tolerate them in my presence one more minute....do they get out in public and act like this to other people or do they simply think they can get by with this behavior in front of you guys??? Clearly a pattern has been set...BREAK IT........
Do so by phone ......or by email....
but tell them they are not welcome in your home again until they
1. apologize
2. control their tongue and their behavior around you.
You might suggest they get some counseling or you could offer to go to family counseling with them but honestly they need to work on THEIR behaviour FIRST......
Really sad but you and your wife need to pull away from her TOXIC PARENTS. They obviously want to try and stay close and CONTROL.......
Don't let them..
Good Luck |
|
tally
|
Wow her family are scum. Just think how crap she must feel if she's always caught between you and her parents?
Well done for showing respect to her parents. I wouldn't have managed for so long. There's no quick fix, just DON'T react to it. They're trying to provoke you. If you flip out and punch her dad in the face he will have won.
I think she needs to realise how unhappy her parents are making you and tell them she has made her choice and they need to back off. You guys are a family now and you need to support each other. |
|
--delinquentfive--
|
.....sell them, buy a double buggy!! =D ha |
|
|
|
|
|
 Blonde please >>>>>>>? |
I want marry a Christian blonde with green eyes
I want to visit Britain or America and look for the girl that I want
I am a Middle East skin ... Do you agree that the Western family of ... |
|
| What was wrong with my question? Why reported and deleted. Would it offend you? Below is the question asked? |
It's 4:00 A.M. I am going to bed now, would anyone like me to say a little prayer for them tonight? What is your sin or what shall I pray for?
Additional Details
also got an email ... |
|
 Which side of parents interferes more? |
| In a marriage, is it the man's parents or woman's that are more then likely to be the interfering inlaws? Also, does it make a difference if one or the other has a disability or is an only ... |
|
| Should I Call It a Day? (Long)? |
| Been together 21 years, married for 6. I have always been relaxed about my husband going on stag weekends, or having nights out with the boys and never had a reason to distrust him. However, just ... |
|
 So upset right now with my husband? |
| I found out today that my pregnancy was confirmed by the doctor .I called my husband at work to tell him that it was confirmed and yes we are having another baby .As I went to the doctor two weeks a ... |
|
 Do you think if we stopped taking Sin so seriously....? |
| Do you think if we stopped taking Sin so serious that maybe God would too? I mean if we can forgive ourselves then surely we don't need to worry about God punishing us?... |
|
 I was just wondering how many other women deal with this kind of issue? |
So tell me how you would react to this...
You're driving in the car with your boyfriend/husband & he's telling you about being out with his friend when he hadn... |
|
 Can you still get a divorce a year latter techically if you still let hubby stay because he had nowhere to go? |
| a friend left her hubby back in april2008 she had to let him stay again with her because he had nowhere to go.Can she still file for divorce in april2009.Will they have to wait another year.... |
|
 As long as u know your lover or husband makes the payments on time, would u help cosign for them? |
| My boyfriend never missed a payment when it came to his car. He also told me that he will have a better chance if we both went together and got the car. I had helped him before by lending him for a ... |
|
 Guys is your wife good looking? |
| would you admit if she wasnt,or is love blind,women this is for ... |
|
 How would you react to a 20-something who said your finace is too young? |
| an aquaintance, who is 29 years old, said that my fiance (27) is not mature enough to be with me (34). He has spent 6 years in the US Navy on a submarine, moved a few times around the country, and is ... |
|
 Is it wrong for a married woman to be just friends with another man? |
| I have a male friend ,he doesnt live near me so we talk on the phone a lot..about all kinds of things.... but my hubby doesnt like it...i find im sneaking the phonecalls when he,s at work now so he ... |
|
 Did anyone here fall in love/get married AFTER 30? |
| I'll be 30 this year and sometimes get depressed that I'm still single. I know there's hope though and was wondering if anyone else had a similar experience that ended happily. Thanks!... |
|
 When spouses have been betrayed by INFIDELITY why is it significant they list the years married on this Q&A? |
Calendar years married does not necessarily mean a good solid marriage.
In my opinion the longer I've been married the more respect I would required and deserve.
If you ... |
|
 My EF just surprised me at work with two tickets to the sold-out Jonas Brothers concert my daughter wants? |
to attend. My EF (Emotional Friend) says they are a "no-strings gift" and "there may be a surprise at the concert in Seat No. 3."
I can't not accept the tickets. M... |
|
 IMKO needs Your AdViCE!? |
| I'm in love with a girl for more than 2 years but i cant tell her that im in love? What to ... |
|
 What all do you half to do get a marriage licences? |
| What do you half to go threw to get a marriage licences? How long does it take, and do they send something in the mail for us to take to a church to get married. My fiancee and I are wanting to get ... |
|
|
No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
Not English
