I need your opinion. Adults only please.... i dont want 13 yr old trying to give me advice...?

Alice K

It depends on how old you are. Saddling yourself with marriage and children before you have a chance to live a little life on your own is one of the saddest things that can happen to anyone. He sounds very mature--like a keeper.

InTheDark

Maybe he doesn't want the marriage to happen because of the birth of a child but instead as a tribute to the love you two share.

sadandconfused

Oh I just think that he doesn't want it NOW. That's all! Sounds like he loves you. I think he would want to start a relationship with you NOT on a shaky foundation of surprises but more well planned; I think that was what he meant.

naughty_mattress_monkey

Don't over analyze it. He was trying to tell you he would do the moral thing by marrying you if you were pregnant, sooner than he anticipated. This is obviously a "Freud" moment on his part.

idiotzaint

probably meant it would be better to marry because of choice and not because of kid on the way

CaliforniaDreamer

The only person that can answer this question correctly is him, but I'll give it a go...

I think he was saying that he doesn't want to marry you because you were pregnant. He wants to marry you when the time is right. Or he could have just been making a little joke.

Chris Polo

Honey, I think he just doesn't want to go too fast and mess things up with the two of you is all.

gummi bear

Maybe he doesn't want to get married just because you are prego. He may want to do it the "right" way and get married, house then kids. Or maybe he wants to do it on his own time frame and doesn't want to be rushed because of a baby. He may feel like a child born out of wedlock is not ok and if you are prego he must put his beliefs aside and get married before he is ready.

He also may have been kidding. I wouldn't be too worried about it either way

Charles SC

I don't know how old you are but I would guess young. Marriage is very difficult. You have to be partners with another person for as long as it lasts. Think about your friends that used to be the greatest in the world, but then over time something happened, and now you detest them. Same thing happens in a lot of marriages. Now throw a third person in that can't communicate very well....what a trying situation that becomes. Babies aren't barbies, you can't put them away on shelf when they become inconvenient. They are also VERY expensive. It would be sad for anyone to marry or have a child without a mature understanding of what they are getting into. And it happens everyday. So, here is my advise. Don't get married until you know why you want to stay with that person for years. Understand that both of you will NOT be the same people in 5 years time. And, with blinders off, be able to look at that person and know they will work with you, not ignore or control you, but work with you.

bm4huskers

Don't be too quick to judge it. I say stupid stuff all the time and my wife now knows when things come out wrong. He might not have wanted to rush into marriage becuase of a baby and just wants to wait till you both feel it's the right time. Be glad he's the type of guy that would stay with you if you did get pregnant.

bridgett

hes probably just not ready for kids.

bacdafucup

Actually it's not as bad as it sounds. He meant he doesn't want to rush into a wedding. He wants to enjoy the relationship and probably wants to ask you to marry him in a way that is memorable as opposed to, "Well junior when your ma got knocked up we flew to Vegas for the weekend . . . " The fact that he would marry you (even if you had to rush into it) if you were pregnant lends credit that you are with the right guy.

shadouse

He may want to marry you but on his terms, not be rushed into it. He probably really likes the idea, but may not be ready financially or otherwise.
Do not dwell on it too much. You will drive your self crazy.

Auntie Bubbles

Perhaps he meant that he wanted to marry you because you guys *wanted* to, and were ready to be married, not because you might have *had* to get married.
Hope so, anyway. I agree with the other answerer, too; get tested for STD's and use birth control until you're sure he wants to have a baby and be with you to raise it!
Best wishes.

Flower

Maybe he thinks it would be sad to "have" to marry. He wants to marry you, just you (not you and your baby), and then start a family.

furface

remember guys are dumb and often says stupid things that they think are funny he is being a guy now you need to do the same thing to him just try and take it away from him tell him you don't think he would make a good husband or dad he will spin around for you good luck

vagpenisdude

He could have said that because he would want to marry you out of love and not out of need. having a child might make him feel as if he "needs" to marry you.

favorite things in life are free

I think maybe he is a poor communicator. He might have meant something like "I wouldn't want us to HAVE to get married just because you were pregnant". TALK to him and ask him exactly what he meant by that comment.

littleme836

Maybe he knows that you are the one but isn't ready to make that commitment yet. I would be kinda offended too if he said that. Maybe he wants to marry you because he loves you and not because he feels morally obligated.

bogaloobaby

Maybe it was ment to be a joke. If it bother you just let him know and ask him what that was about.

Danielle T

He probably meant that it would be sad to marry you because you were pregnant rather than because you love each other and want to be together. He probably just isn't ready for kids yet. Talk to him about it. You'll feel better.

tog

He would probably feel "trapped" and "obliged" to do the "right thing" by you.

This in no way means he doesn't love you or want marriage and kids at some point, he is really contented with the way things are and that is a good thing.

You have a "great relationship" and that in itself is the making of a wonderful future together if it is meant to be.

I would chill out and not take it to heart (what he said) .

Sounds like you got a decent bloke there and there's not too many of them around, you'll be fine.

Togs

C H

Maybe he does, but just not right now. I think he just wants to take his time and do thing right. Not ask you from pressure, but ask you because the time is right and he can give you all you deserve and not short you for that.

lavek

if he's very traditional, maybe he meant that it'd be sad that you two would be getting married because of a pregnancy, rather than because of the love itself only. thats the only reason i could think that it'd be looked at as a downside.... talk openly with him about it, only he can give you the direct response of what he meant by it

Midget1122

Depending on your ages he may not be ready to have kids or get married yet. Though I think he wants you guys to get married when you are ready to and not feel rushed just because you're pregnant.

Linda

I think he means that if you were pregnant at a young age you two would have to sacriface so much in order to support this child. I dont think he is ready for a child or even commitment yet. You may want to discuss with him what he is feeling. Ask him where do you see us in the future?

hemant

ur ? was incomplete....if the guy wants to marry u than why he said it wud b sad..mayb it just came out of his mouth n he didnt meant it..n mayb wht is there in his heart came on his mouth accidentally..he mite b playing around with u..u r the better judge...if u both love each other than go ahead

K H

Do you think he meant "HAVE" to as in having no choice? He might prefer to marry you for love when you are both ready, not due to the obligation of parenthood. You really should ask him what he meant, otherwise this is going to hang over you for the rest of your relationship.

Dashing Geek

It may be that he wants the marriage to be about a romantic proposal and the ideal of two people who CHOOSE to live together, happily ever after. To have to marry you because you are pregnant lacks romance and makes it less of a choice and more of a mandate.

While women fantasize about the wedding itself, men actually fantasize about the romance that leads up to the proposal. After that we are satisfied and kind of checlk out of the whole thing. We really do want the romance that leads up to the commitment, and we want it to be a big swooning type of emotional experience.

I wouldn't worry about it. He loves you. :-)

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: