If a man hits his wife, is it always certain that he will do it again?

Brianna

You didn't get hit. He beat you up!

Every single woman who has been hit has had the man sitting there crying and giving reasons and how it never happened before. How long were those relationships of his ex's? Were most of them under the amount of time you two have been together? That may be why he never hit them before.

Somewhere your dynamic has made him comfortable enough to hit you. Will it happen again? Yes. Maybe not this week, month or even year. But it will happen again sometime within your life with him. How often is he going to get this stressed? What if he has surgery again? What if the economy gets worse? What if he loses his job? What is the line of stress that makes it ok for him to hit you?

Here's one of the biggest reasons i tell people that Love isn't that important in a relationship. Love fixes nothing. Security, trust, friendship... those are key to a great marriage. Trust can be repaired at times, but what is he really doing to earn that trust back? He went over two years without hitting you once... how long till the second time. Will him not hitting you for two more years earn back your entire trust, or will it start to weigh on your mind that that is the time frame it might happen again?

He needs some help. A smack during a heated argument where you called him a name MIGHT be able to be over looked, though i'd argue against it. But a broken nose and lumps on your head? He didn't hit you. He BEAT you up. There is a large difference. What would you tell me if you saw me with the broken nose and lumps and i explained my husband did it? What would you know in your heart to be true? What would your advice to me be?

Your security within that marriage has been breached and the trust should be non existent right now. Anger management, a true psychologist for some extensive counseling for both and some marriage counseling to help see if the marriage can be healed. I do not advocate throwing away a marriage, yet i have never known a man who beat up a woman once and never did it twice.

MissingInAction

My wife does stuff that really pisses me off sometimes but I would NEVER hit her or insult her.

Queen of Beer

He broke your nose? What the hell are you doing thinking about staying with him? I hope he is in jail right now!

Thanks!

Yes it will happen again, get out of that fantasy world and find a good man.

Happy-2

Where human behavior is concerned, you can chuck the word "always" out the window. I can tell you that, statistically, a man who has hit a woman once is far more likely to hit a woman a second time than is a man who has never hit a woman. So, this is a bad thing. I think you should both...

1. Accept his apology; AND

2. Matter of factly inform him that if he ever does hit you again, he will go directly to jail, he will not pass Go, and he will not collect $200.

golfnut5565

yes, he will do it again....it's a control thing.

Mrs. B

Honey if you have any respect for yourself, you will leave now and never look back. Take it from someone who put up with that kind of crap for years before getting the guts to leave (that would be me). The first time a man hits you is very rarely the last. Go now, and never ever ever tolerate that from ANYONE.

sweetme21

If he did it once he will do it again trust. The crying might be sincere but he will do it. And the next time is going to be worts. I went thrue the same thing and my expartner told me he wasnt going to do it. But he did and it become more frequent. Becareful and good luck

Nikki

I think that most of the time they will hit you again, there's always an exception to the rule. I have several concerns...
1. he didn't just hit you, he beat you. 2. Marriages go through all sorts of stresses. My point being, is this going to happen every time there is stress in your marriage?
My advice is to call your local domestic violence shelter and talk to someone. It's confidential so they won't tell anyone else, but they will document it. You should also have them take pictures to keep there in a file. If he ever lays a hand on you again, go to the police.

The African Queen

He won't change. You might be the first woman that he hit, but it won't be the last time that he hits you.

P1 Rubber Ducky

1 fist 2 fist 3 fist 4....... yes once he hit you you should have hit the door. there is NO excuse for hitting a woman esp if they "love you"

Alex / Asheville NC

Report this buthead to the cops, for future reference, take pics, inform dependable family members, and his parents, Real Men NEVER Hit Women, Stress is no reason to take abuse.

China Doll 3

Yes.

mr.c

he's lucky you didnt wait till he was sleeping and cracked his skull with a frying pan. maybe your dad or your brothers could pay him a visit and break his leg or his arm and then ask him how it feels.

your hubby needs his **** whipped.

maybe he will hit you again, maybe he wont, are you willing to risk it.

jeterluvr

it may be stress because of his surgery and he's probably depress about it. cuz hes been off work for 6 weeks.

the man broke your nose!!!! come on! seriously? if he's apologizing fine, let him apologize. but also keep your eye on him, see how his emotions and personality change towards you. if you think hes abusing physically or verbally.... leave him. because a man shouldnt hit his wife

blueeyed grl

If you accept this behavior, it is likely to happen again....why, you may ask...because there isn't any consequence for his behavior.

The better question to ask is : If he did it once, what will keep him from doing it again?

I have been hit...and yes he did it again, and again, and again, and again. Why? Cause he knew he could.

tamarra j

yes he will so dont let him fool you

celina

yes,yes and yes

J.J.

YES!

life goes on

yes he a woman beater and don;t let him do it again get the heck out,

J'Adore.<3

He would definitely do it again. Over and over again and he will continue to make it hard for you to leave when he cries. But find it in your heart to leave before he kills you.

Mean Carleen

We live in stressful times and life IS stress...so what can you expect him to break the next time he is stressed? Your taking a really big chance staying. If a dude broke MY nose...one of us would be going to the bone yard....

well since you asked.

That is no excuse. Once he has...much more likely to happen again.

Get out before it does.

Ron Akia

The odds are in favor of his being a repeat offender. You might want to give him another chance but suggest that he go for counseling regarding this issue. If he refuses and starts to get violent again dump him while it's not too late.

Angel's Wings

I'm with Happy-2 above.

Look, now you know what he does when he reaches his lowest, breaking point.

It is very important that you make it crystal clear to him that if you even think that HE is thinking about raising his hand to you that you will be gone so fast!

This is a deal breaker. Period.

I believe in second chances, but he needs to know he screwed up big time!

Ann

unless you shoot him in the nuts - yes
If you don't want to leave him, fine - call the cops and let them teach him the consequences of his actions. you can stay with him if you wish, but make sure he knows that you will not ever be okay with being his punching bag. Love to you - turn your tears into power - you will have time to cry later - for now - put yourself in a postion of strength. Get out for a while, or get someone in for a while.

blackpearl

He did more than just hit you, he beat the hell out of you. You have a broken nose and battered face to prove it. He may have never hit before but to launch a violent attack on your wife is serious. You 2 need help I understand he may feel very contrite and sorry for what he did, but he beat you like a man beats on another man. Look into counseling if you want to stay or risk that if he is that angry again you might suffer worse.. GOD BLESS AND KEEP YOU

I love cooking!

I asssuming you didn't call the police since you want to get back with him. My sis. n law is with a guy who makes those same promises but yet he does it again and again. He even hit her upside the head with a can when she was pregnant. Don't give him another chance, you should leave him.

thelarge17

Damn right. Dump that creep and get the hell out.

casper

Anything is possible. But the probability is that it Will Happen Again. Men/Women who cross the line in a violent way are also VERY good at trying to convince their partner "It will Never happen again". He had to hit you awfully hard to have broken your nose. Now at the very least, he's instilled "fear" and "uncertainty" in you. Personally, I'd walk away. Be careful and good luck.

cynthia

Get out now! Haven't you seen how many men/women kill one another? Highly unlikely it will be a one time thing! I know from experience. I regret I did not leave sooner! If he is that great and loves you, then why did he hit you in the 1st place? They are always sorry and have an excuse. I have heard them over & over before. I would leave while I could.

Blessed

YES. My husband of 8+ years has done it many times, and calling names, aggressive behaviour, degrading, humiliating, all repeat in a cycle with seasons of ''i love yous'' and ''how I'd die if I weren't with you'' and ''no matter what happens we can't live without each other'' and then BAM, SMACK. There it comes again, surprisingly. What I have noticed is that he uses his PHYSICAL STRENGTH to control me since he doesn't have any MORAL OR SPIRITUAL STRENGTH to control HIMSELF. It's a disease, and instead of trying to fix him, get out AS FAST AS YOU CAN girl. Be safe, take care. NEVER put up with a MALE who hits a woman, IT TAKES A MAN to respect a woman. Males know how to mate, eat, sleep and hit, whereas MEN know how to respect, love, and care.

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