 
|
Roger S
 |
How about talking to a marriage counselor before rushing to get a divorce? A divorce is messy for all in involved and there may be a way to save your marriage. Did he make a mistake or does he want to keep the other woman? Unless that is the case, an affair doesn't have to mean automatic divorce.
If you decide to take a divorce, then just get an attorney and start the process. You will go to mediation and your lawyer will help you try to negotiate with him. A lot of what you are entitled to or not depends on the laws where you live.
Just remember his lack of faithfulness as a husband has nothing to do with his love for his children. I feel bad for you, your husband, and your children. Everyone's lives will be damaged. |
|
Richard G
 |
What gives you the right to "insist" on anything. The courts will make you sell the home, and split equity in half, or maybe give you the option to keep the home if you have children, but then YOU will have to pay the payments, not him. |
|
pixie
|
Leave him and get a job.. Why take take take? |
|
Gilly
 |
I would say that my self respect and the needs of my kids were most important. I would suggest he walks away and puts a charge on the house so that if you EVER sell it (you are going to meet someone else and have a great life and he will be loaded!) he can take his 50% but for the meantime for the sake of the chidren's stability, he remains there and you pay all the bills etc, but he continues to contribute 50% of the mortgage payments on top of any maintenance. That way he is maintaining his profit share in the house, his children are not suffering a house move and parents separating, and when you want to move on you can and you are not losing too much. The you can concentrate on putting your life back together with dignity.
Good luck |
|
NATIVE NEW YORKER
|
SWEETIE
GET A LAWYER - NOW |
|
dawncs
|
The best choice is A. It may not seem like it at this time, but it would allow you to buy a more affordable place for yourself and your children. If you chose b and he stopped paying, it would be a contempt, but it takes time to get a court hearing and could lose the house then. |
|
GreenEyedSista
 |
I would say (a). I think (b) would be hard to enforce, depending on where you live, especially if you are not married and I don't think (c) is enforceable either. Might have to get a better job, and you are better off without him. |
|
Very Sexy Vixen
|
Tell him to piss off.................. if he doesn't want you and the kids it's his job to walk away and start again not yours!!!!!!!!!!! Stand your ground and don't let him take anyhting!!!!!!!!!! xx |
|
taketwo
|
If you have children then he can't make you to sell the house. Put your foot down stay with your children. See your solicitor asap. |
|
mind advanture
|
Get your financial or mental support or advise from immediate family or your parent to go through the painful process. Be strong ..since u hve children to take care. Good luck for u. |
|
.
|
Typical woman! Why not try and resolve your differences and address the reason why he's having it off with someone else instead of trying to bleed him dry! |
|
Alexis M
 |
If you like the house than I would go with B out of B or C. If you can't stand to be in that house A But don't watch him. Start your own life. You could make him have the kids more often than you so yu have a chances to find love again if you want. |
|
doggy dog
|
you seem to think more of the money than the kids , remember why he at work bringing in the money for you and the kids to spend, and for him to have an afair you can't be all inocent, its the kids i feel sorry for they didn't ask for this , |
|
hennesseywalton
|
hello pissed off, at one time you both loved eachother. we live in a society were the only thing that people can see and say in this situation is lawyer, sue, leave him in the cold, dog him out etc.. why not try talking to him and bringing out the decent part that you once were in love with and just coming to a agreement between the two of you for your behalf the children and his. if you can make agreement then most definatly have your lawyer stipulate the agreement. doesnt hurt to try this 1st. If that doesnt work then I,m sure you will still get a lawyer to help you out..hope your family turns out for the best. |
|
Pam
|
a) You already know the money will run out if you don't manage it wisely. Get your head on straight. You must think clearly. Don't ever again say "hope for the best" That's defeat talk. Have a concrete plan for your life
b)Yes, make that part of the divorce, he pays the mortgage until the kids grow up. You said he can afford it, so why not? Why are you even debating that?
c) It's only fair to split the equity.
Lady, get it together. It's over and it's time to move on. It's strictly business at this point. You have to plan for the care of your children. There's no guarantee that he'll do what's best for the kids out of the goodness of his heart. Get it in writing.
First and foremost guard your credit as you would your life. You can't get a decent job with bad credit.
Fight to the bitter end to stay in your home and have him pay until a specific date.
Stop being pissed off. Don't let him steal your happiness any longer. You are in control of you. You might need to take off for a while to get things into perspective. |
|
buzy_bee_21
|
call a lawyer |
|
babygirl
|
did you find out? then get a divorce |
|
lookingforananswer
|
B you have to look for stability for you and your kids. believe me being homeless is not fun. |
|
pete cross
 |
get rid of them |
|
big pup in a small bath
|
Surely you can see a solicitor for advice - on legal aid you get one or more free consultations, don't you? I think you are entitled to some of his income - are you married? How long have you been together? Option b sounds good if he agrees to it. How amiably have you been able to approach the split? |
|
claire
 |
It will get easier,at least some other poor bugger has to put up with his moods. I would go for B I think. I'm sure he has to support your children until 16. If not then get your name on council list fast. At least that way if he decides to sell house you have a back up! Or go into rented place and leave him and his ********* to the house and the bills and you and the kids can start fresh. Sell house go half's and enjoy the rest of your life. Whatever you decide to do all the best. |
|
aimstir31
|
I would say (b) if you want to still live there. If you absolutely divorcing do you really want to live in that house? Maybe take the kids and start a new life with them and try to forget about the past. Get him for child support will help. Good luck and best wishes for a brighter tomorrow. |
|
homebuyer
|
I'd say B, except until the youngest is 18. In the meantime, you need to get yourself a better job, so you can take care of yourself. Think about getting some kind of training that you could complete in a couple of years--paralegals make great money, for example, and it doesn't take that long to get that degree.
Don't just take the cash and think you can use it to supplement your income, cos it will eventually run out and you won't have anything left.
Don't make your decision based on "bleeding" him, or based on what will make it harder for him--do it based on what is best for you and your kids. That's what matters. You can have a happy life if you take care of yourself and your kids. You have to just let go of your anger towards him, cos it will only end up hurting you and your children. They will be plenty angry on their own. What good is a man you can't trust, anyway? The next guy will be MUCH better--because you will have become a successful, independent woman who attracts a better type of man. |
|
Foxy
|
I would say C, he has cheated on you |
|
rooney
 |
It's always wise to hold on to property, it is the best investment you couls make in your life.
He cheated, you don't work, you have the kids so you should get the house and child support and alimony. You have become accustomed to a certain lifestyle and he must accomodate that lifestyle whether he is there or not.
See a lawyer and act quickly. Log everything and keep copies of everything.
DO NOT leave the house or it may look like abandonment of the marriage and home.
He is the one who screwed up, he cheated that 's a deal breaker so you have the advantage, be wise and calculate every step you take. don't screw it up by allowing anger or laziness get in the way. |
|
™Spaceman™
|
forgive him he was just bored with you. |
|
grindandflash
|
Tell them you are most upset at not being invited to join in. |
|
amazincajn_99
|
If he cheated...get a lawyer. If he makes that much money then the child support will be really good and will help you a lot. |
|
Forlorn Hope
|
if i was him, i'd take the kids and leave you out in the cold... :D |
|
DALET4
|
Definitely point (b), this will hurt him more financially. I don't think the other options are viable due to the fact there is an element of risk due to your financial situation.
Its not your fault for whats happened, its his so why should you suffer?
He should be made to support the children until they're old enough to support themselves.
I hope this helps. |
|
|
|
|
No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
Not English
