If your spouse is cheating would you want to have it out with the other person or your spouse?

Lil_MissVal

No I wouldn't have it out with the other person...The cheating woman or man did no more than the cheating spouse allowed them to do...If the spouse doesn't respect the marriage why should the person in which he cheated with? The woman doesn't owe me any explanation as to why she slept with my man...its he who is going to have to answer, before a judge after I file those papers!!!

sheloves_dablues

Exactly. The only person responsible to you in the relationship is your spouse. The person they are cheating with has nothing to do with it...

sassywv

From personal experience:

We met through personals. He told me he was separated and because of the kids "they" were going to move slow with the divorce. He was looking for a place of his own. They were friends who just drifted apart and he thought he should have someone special in his life to share things with, hence, the divorce. Him and I talked on the phone several times a day. We emailed one another and had even met several times. I liked him, but there was never any "sparks" to this blooming relationship. One day I received a call from a woman claiming to be this guys wife. I told her I was under the impression he was separated...NOT! His wife asked me to send her, thru her email addy that he knew nothing about, any correspondences he sent me, I told her I would help all I could. She is in love with him and had no one else to turn to. So sometimes the "other person" doesn't know all the facts.

Schwinn

You are absolutely correct. Your spouse is the one that has the commitment to you. That is where the betrayal lies.

The other person has no loyalty to you and owes you absolutely nothing.

princessfionafantasy

true. but i would want to have it out with both.
its easier being mad at someone you dont love or know.

doodlebug

Exactly. It's not an issue with the other person, it's an issue
with the spouse. If your spouse isn't faithful, it's a problem of
theirs, it's their personality flaw. They have issues with
trust, respect, and dignity.

Brandy

I agree. Why attack the other person...unless of course they are your friend or relative.

kystik83

you already know the answer. just deal with your spouse. say nothing to the other person. your spouse was the one who vowed to be faithful.

Cerealkiller

Basically, it should be your spouse and not the other person because the other person might not even know whats going on..just like myself. I was involved with a married woman for 1 whole year and didnt even know until 6 months ago. I am truly sorry for what had happened to the other guy but, I didn't know and it is difficult to get out of it. So, I think that you do need to rethink about your spouse if they have cheated on you. You can't blame the other person unless they knew the situation from the start. Still it's the spouse's fault because they are the ones to steer the relationship.

baby_cakes_2758

probably my spouse. half the time the other person doesnt know their married. but if they were just as guilty i might have to kick some ones butt!

New Nana

It must be that we love our spouse and want to kick the S***
out of somebody. Why not the scumbag that should have known our lousy spouse was married?

beafoxx1

In most cases, if your spouse cheats than your issue is with your spouse. You aren't married to "the other person" so why fight with them. However, if your spouse cheats with a family member or a friend than you might have to beat both of their a**es!

Ashley

My spouse! Unless the other woman is a friend/family member of mine, then I'd have at them both!

sugarBear

Have it out with your spouse if you are being cheated on.

Free-Lance

I had it out with all three of them my wife , his wife and him!
I made them all feel small and then left her!

hot *********

u are right

Royalhinney

I agree with you, unless the other person knew that he/she is married. Then I'd have a few words for that person as well.

Suthern R

Going after the other person is part of our animalistic predatory nature. Someone with our spouse is like someone entering our domain so to speak. Now as reasonable people that are able to think critically, we should give the blame where it belongs and that is the cheating spouse, but the other person makes a fine target, especially if they know your spouse is married. We often think that by going after the other person, we can scare them off and our spouse will come back.

angijd

This is a very difficult situation only a few years ago it happened to me. I worked with my partner and the other woman, i had it out with both of them it drove me really crazy. He left me for her after us being together nearly 6 years. It only lasted a year and half for them. If you keep it bottled up it will destroy you, you will never trust him again, reading his texts on his mobile or following him, checking his pockets etc. Sit and talk to him in a neutral location like a cafe, ask him if he wants to save your relationship but ask him to be honest and true full, if he does then i suggest councilling it will really help you if not him..good luck.....

goinbonkers2

I'd have it out with my spouse...and if the person my spouse was cheating with knew
that he/she was married....I'd kick her *** too.

Kitty

My spouse of course. The other person had no promises to break, but my spouse would be breaking a promise.

crabbyone

I agree with you, BUT if the other person was a friend of mine or someone who knows we're married, I'd be plenty pissed at them too!

badkitty1969

Spouse. The other person is not responsible to you in any way, shape, or form. And what if your spouse lied to the other person an said he/she wasn't married or was separated or something along those lines? Deal with the spouse. The other person just really isn't that significant.

Princess of the Realm

Neither, I'm not sure that I'd care all that much.

bamagrits84

Both of the if the other person knows your spouse is married. I'm not so sure if I see the need to have it out at all. I know it hurts and people tend to want to lash out at the offender(s), but it really doesn't change the hurt. Anger doesn't get rid of hurt, it only fuels it. And the bottom line is being cheated on hurts.

heavenlyhotchild

it depends, if its like a friend or somebody who knew he was married, then yeah, but if they didnt know, then they are a victim too

ERICKSMAMA

The spouse...

luerai

you should take the matter up with your spouse, the other person is irreverent.

nikie_atkinson

I think i would yell at him pretty good but i would really want to go toe to toe with the girl its just how I'm not that is right but if i saw her she would be going down

urstruly8604

I completley agree. Unless I walked in on it I would leave the other person alone. I wouldn't go out of my way to track them down. My significant other would be who got the majority of my anger.

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