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Emmamart
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Ugh...what a mess. Look, no one is perfect and there are a ton of people on here who will tell you what a bad person you are because of this scenario. First and foremost, please remember no one has the right to judge you. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone hurts people...nobody is above this. Please don't listen to all the horrible words posted here. It doesn't make you a "bad" person...but you are troubled and confused and this situation is only going to lead to so much hurt and pain for so many people, especially the kids. I hate to say this, but most likely he will stay with his wife. I know you love him and can't imagine a life without him, but you have to right now. You're both obviously in marriages that aren't working. This is where you need to focus your efforts right now. If you're so in love with him wouldn't you want him fully devoted to you? I thought so. And if he truly loves you, then he'll want to be with YOU and only you. For your own health, well-being and safety, stay away from this right now. If there's any hope for the two of you, it will be later on when all the issues have been dealt with and all the pain has healed. I wish you all the best. |
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SafetyDancer
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You're toast.
He's obviously pulled this same stunt in the past. I would wager that as soon as he got scared or the wife started acting suspicious, he dropped his other affairs....just like he's going to drop you.
He'll stay with his wife because she is the key to keeping his kids.
Happens all the time, hun. Pick up the pieces of your broken heart and start to put together a new life. |
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chlango1
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looks like you got yourself in to some s HIT. i will be afraid to be honest with you because i watch a lot of court TV and in there i see a lot of these cases and in most of them one of the woman's almost always die. it can be you. so if you don't know martial arts or something like that i strongly suggest that you get a bodyguard |
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Rachel M
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um... You are a bad person. You just most likely ruined your life and his! |
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sgtsdanko2
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You're in love with a habitual cheater? I think you know the answer to this one. Despite how much it will hurt.. do you have enough self-esteem to find a more decent guy? |
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cork
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EXPECT THE WORSE..
HE CRAWLS BACK TO HER...
YOU OUT.. |
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physandchemteach
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Well now you have destroyed two families. The innocent spouses and children will be the ones to suffer. Congratulations! You and your lover can now divorce and find true happiness together! By the way - don't be too surprised if his wife convinces him to stay with her after the counseling. |
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the_silverfoxx
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by law he has lost more than his children as well you as well she have you in court when the divorce is set belive me on this matter. my opion ? ref<<. legal .? |
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Sonny
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He's not right for you. he married and the key thing is that he's hiding. He's a cheater. he'll cheat on you too!!!! |
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Quociana L
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you should stay away from him. there is a chance he can work out his marital problems but if you keep running interference you will have torn apart 2 marriages |
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lily
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Wait and see what happens. (Keep your mouth shut) It sounds like you picked a real winner. You two deserve each other. |
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zzHoUnDzz
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What will probably happen next is that he will stop seeing you.
Sorry.Thats the price of seeing a married man. |
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smrt-e-pnts
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Perhaps it's time to look at what you think of yourself that you would allow your time to be taken by someone who doesnt respect his wife, his children, or you enough to be honest with any of you.
Why would you pine after a man who is so clearly unable to keep his word and his commitment? Don't you value honesty and integrity? Don't you deserve respect? Doesn't his wife? From you and her husband?
If you truly love him, then step aside and allow him the space to make a decision. He's an adult (although he's more like a kid in a candy store) and will need to think for himself on this one.
Meanwhile, take a good hard look at what you want from your life. You say you have kids - would you ever want your children to feel the way you do? Would you want to cause them the same pain that your lover's children are going to feel when they find out about their dad's infidelities? If the answer to that is no, then my friend, you should start living a life that your children can learn from. Respect, integrity. Honesty. Values. These are all things that children learn from the way their parents behave. Don't set yourself up for any more heartache. If he's done it before, he'll do it again. But the next time, he'll be cheating on YOU. |
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stephanie_kanode
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GET YOUR A _ _ KICKED. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU . YOU JUST DESTROYED A MARRIAGE . GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOU. HOME WRECKER. YOU MAKE ME SICK. HOW DARE YOU MESS WITH ANOTHER WOMEN MAN. I MEAN REALLY THINK ABOUT IT. |
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Howdydowdy
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I am in a simular position at the moment...though my relationship has only been going for 6 months. I know how bad (and quilty) you feel! This is what i am doing - the best thing is to isolate yourself from this person. If that means moving away or changing jobs, do it. get a hobby or interest and throw yourself into it (helps take your mind off things). Take charge! Tell him that you don't want to be seen as the bad person in all of this (as you will be) and this is how it has to be. Let him sort out his marriage without you interfering (even if thats not what you are doing, it is what his wife will be thinking!!) If you are meant to be together, he will separate from his wife and come to you later on down the track once everything is over, but don't hold your breath or wait for him!! It is a very hard choice to have to make but generally the only one who comes out the loser in this sort of relationship is you....he will probably stay married, keep his family unit and his wife will keep him, and you?? Well... |
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smiley4822
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what do you wantto happen? thats the real question.. do you think he is going to leave his wife for you ? sorry to disapoint you. if that was his true meaning then he would have done that long time ago. he is using you like a rug.... |
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tantalizin1
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he's not gonna leave his wife for you so i suggest you get over him and make things work with YOUR husband! |
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Common Sense
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What will happen next .......Nothing....
You & he have much in common...
Both married....Both cheaters...Both living with spouses..
Both have kids...Neither getting a divorce...Both in trouble..
If by some wild chance you two were to somehow find a way
to get married & live together, one of you would be cheating again
in a few years and it would all start over...
Sorry, I don't mean to be negative but that is how the situation strikes me... |
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DAYNA S
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They don't leave their wives, They just cheat on them. if he left her for you, then he'd be cheating on you next. drop his butt now. |
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Aurora
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You can expect that he won't leave his wife and if she convinced him to go to marriage counseling, you can even expect that he will eventually cut all ties with you. It's a dead end for you because more than likely, he won't give up his family for you. |
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Leila G
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What is wrong with some people nowadays? Doesn't the words "To Forsake Others" mean anything anymore? Why should you be upset because his wife found out? You have no right to be upset! You should be ashamed of yourself. Him as well. Do you even realize the hurt you're causing to his wife?
I absolutely have zero tolerance for women like you! You KNEW he was married but yet you continue to have a relationship with him. And don't try to justify your actions by saying that your marriage was over. As far as I'm concerned, your marriage isn't over until you finalize your divorce.
What do you think will happen now? I can guess that he won't leave his wife, not even for you. If he was so unhappy with her to begin with, why hasn't he left her yet to be with you, huh? You can continue to play stupid and believe his lies that he still loves you but as long as he's still with his wife, you are just a booty call. Take it or leave it. |
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sweetangel7898
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I think you should forget about him. Let him take care of his problems. this guy has some serious problems that he needs to deal with. Even though you love him for now it may seem like the hardest thing too do. He doesn't want to let go of his marriage. If he has cheated on her that many times. If your not happy in your marriage you need to let go of your husband as well. And find someone that isn't married and be happy with. and no you are not a bad person. he is he was the one that decided to cheat on his wife that many times. |
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sweet
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i don't know what will happen next but just be ready in what ever will happen...
what ever happens life must go on you know....
but you should tell him though...so that he will know also....
i think you also made a terrible mistake and you should face the consequences... just be ready for it |
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pinkky
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if its meant to be it will be..but u were messing with fire when u started the relationship..you need sit back and let things cool down for a while don't rush into a decision.. |
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truckerdude
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You say your not the first affair. What makes you think you will be the last ? |
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Poppet
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Well you have gotten yourself in quite a pickle. Unfortunately your not going to find much pity in these parts. What you are going through is one of the chances one takes when one becomes the other woman. However, you forgot that no good can come of an affair. (for any party involved)
No, your not a bad person. You made a poor life choice. Let go of him, seriously. Look what his choices are doing to his family. Pain and heartache. You helped cause that. Even if he leaves his wife, would you ever really be able to trust him? He cheated on her with you, who is to say that one day your situation wouldn't be reversed. |
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lovinmamaof3
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Both of you should have used your freaking brains cause not only is your marriage screwed but so is his.The messed up part is you both were stupid and now your and his kids are going to have to pay for it. You children will know you cheated on there dad and the same with your bf's kids. Kids take news like that hard and plus it doesn't make you look good to them, stupid idiots like you and your bf shouldn't have ever gotten married if ya can't be faithful. |
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Etoile
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Ewww What the hell is wrong with u!? SERIOUSLY!? EVEN though you are not the only one he slept with that doesn't justify anything hun. Please...ur not a slave to an animal. Your human have some dignity! He is married. What makes u think he wouldn't cheat on ur dumb *** anyways!? Please. |
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Jeanne S
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I know it seems like you love him so much, but you deserve someone that is free to be with you. Try to get your life in order, divorce your husband if there is no hope, and find someone who is truly your soulmate. I had a relationship with a married man 15 years ago and it hurt when I broke it off. I knew it wasn't right and I felt guilty. But although it hurts at first, you will get over it! It sounds like your lover's wife wants to keep him and get him into marriage counseling. All married men with kids use that as an excuse to try to have their cake and eat it too. |
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Suzanne
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Get an STD test......and find someone without the baggage. B ut....don't feel that bad. She would have found out wether it was with you or one of the many other woman he has had. He will cheat on you too. And please don't tell me that you actually believe him when he told you that he only told YOU that he loved you. He is a player honey and you are vulnerable. Get away from him....he is garbage. If you don't you will end up EXACTLY like his wife. I GUARANTEE IT!!! |
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Adult 
Gambling
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