Is having completely separate bank accounts normal in a marriage?

Polly

Separate bank accounts mean that neither of you are committed to the other. It's a sign of lack of trust between husband and wife. It's a symtom of deeper problems that you have in your relationship.

Girliegirl

Most married couples I know throw it all into the same pot. I only know 2 couples that keep it separate. One marriage seems happy, but the other one the spouse that makes less seems to resent the one that makes more sometimes...
I couldn't imagine trying to keep it all separate. It makes our lives easier to just combine it all.

stupendous

Nah, separate checking accounts are not as bad as that hyphenated last name, keeping their maiden name in it.

The only thing I would want is to make sure that both partners could check either account without having to consult the partner first.

If she is constantly asking for money at the end of the month, maybe you need to try to help her make a budget for her money. Working together on financial issues is a good bonding tool.

I would venture to say that money and financial concerns are two of the biggest reasons why marriages don't last. When there is a big problem, one or both tend to internalize their fears.

â™«â™ªâ™¥Pamelaâ™ªâ™¥â™«â˜¼

sounds like trouble. do you pay all the bills. and if so you need her to pay her share. if she spoiled when a divorce comes he will look at that level of lifestyle you provided for. belief me being responsible is much better. she should see this. many couple have separate accounts because many have traditional jobs and other have self employed jobs which make it easier for the separate account. some are couple that joined in marriage after years of being independent. so it varies to the couple.

mikeyg

We've been doing that for years and it is not a symptom of any problems. Our paychecks are direct-deposited in what we call the Household account which pays the mortgage and car payments and those kind of things,

We then each get an "allowance" transferred into each of our separate accounts. The bills get paid and when either of us runs out of money in our separate accounts we wait until the next payday,

Much less stressful. We can each buy whatever we want and the other doesn't care. The money needed to run the household is safe in it's own account.

Don't read anything into all this. It's just a good simple way to deal with the money,

Giving out loans messes it all up. Shouldn't do that.

We get our separate money every week, which helps with not overspending for the month.

Gege P

When i get married, i am planning on having separate account and then a joint account for the bills. One big mistake couples makes before they get married is to discuss how they feel about money, how the bills are going to be paid, etc. You should really seat her down and talk about this. From what you say, she sounds like she is very irresponsible with her money. Why don't you both attend one of those seminar, about how to manage money; she might get a clue.

kim h

It depends on what works for you. My husband and I have all our financial stuff together. My in laws have been married for 45 years and has their separate. The way they do it works for them but would not work for me. Your wife needs to learn to manage her money better unless she does not make that much. If you do it separately I really don't think that splitting the bills 50/50 works unless you both make the same amount of money.

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