Is it normal sometimes to hate your husband?

nascargirlrdh

We've only been married for 6 months, and I can understand where you are coming from. Your husband sounds a lot like mine when he gets in one of his "moods". One thing I have learned is to just shut up, go to another room that is quiet, take deep breaths, pray, and just stay in there until I CALM down. Consider the fact that there may be an underlying stimulant for his attitude. For my husband, it's work. He's been having to work 90 hours a week but only gets paid for 40. We rarely see each other, rarely get a chance to talk etc, and puts a strain on our relationship. When he gets like what you described, mad as I may be (and trust me, I get very similar to the way you get), I have to make myself remember that he is EXHAUSTED, frustrated, and just not in a mood to deal with conflict of any sort...esp if he's the one in the wrong.

I think it's normal to feel extreme dislike to him at times. Just try to make sure you watch what you say, calm down, and act like the bigger person. Later, when he is in a good mood, try to calmly and rationally talk to him about what you are feeling in times like those. My husband responds better to an email. Lets him digest it, get over being offended, hurt, or angry before we actually talk about it. I've found that in doing that, HE actually will come to me an apologize first.

Here's something I recommend to ALL married couples...it's called "The Love Dare" and goes along with the movie "Fireproof". Check it out - it is awesome!

Sunny

You know what? Just because you LOVE someone doesn't guarantee you'll LIKE them every minute of every day. What you're feeling is normal, and as long as it passes without permanent damage, this is no threat to your relationship.

mem11363

We are together 20 years now and find this fairly common.

mosaic

Ok... compare it to this:
I've been with my fiance for many years. He cheated on me at least once that I gave him proof of (with one of my supposed friends). He also practically lived at the strip bars when we first met and was also seeing a stripper while seeing me.
When I confronted him about all this we got into huge arguments and he hit me.
He he's sorry (but shows no remorse... a few tears that are followed with severe anger again) and gets very angry when I even bring up the cheating. He says that he apologized and enough is enough. He won't own up to the other times of cheating even though I know it for a fact.
He rarely wants to spend time with me and continually blames our rocky relationship on me.
I know that I have been stupid to stick around.
Believe it or not... he has his nice side too and most people would say he seems to be a great guy.
The purpose of my rant is to tell you:
It can always be worse.
And as far as HATE.. oh yes, I've hated him more than I could comprehend. How can you not hate someone who hurts you?

Badkitty

Those are very "normal" feelings. Love and hate are very close emotions. I get what your saying, I have felt the same way at times. Then when I settle down I feel guilty for those feelings.

Liv

I think it's very normal, and relationships go through these phases. A wise person said to me a while ago, that marriage isn't about finding the perfect man (they don't exist) it's about finding the one that annoys you the least. Part of the marriage is to accept you those stages where you really do think you hate the other person. I think the term familiarity breeds contempt may have some truth.

Men have this inbuilt thing about apologizing - somewhere along the way they decide never to do it.

I think those successful marriages that last decades - they learn to switch off when their partner is being a muppet. But I'm not there yet!

It might be good to book a girlie weekend or something, you'd be suprised, you will love him again in a while.

â™¥cutemammaâ™¥

I dont know about normal.. but i hear ya. lol

I have been married for 6 1/2 years.. together for 7. I really truly love him, but there are times that he just get under my skin, that I just want to smack HIM! Yes it sounds bad.. and probably terrible. But He tells me he feels the same way from time to time. We actually DONT hurt each other.. lol It seems normla for us.. he annoys me... i annoy him.. then we get over it and move on.
I didnt say it was normal... but it real.

Besides, it impossible to like some one 110% of the time... right? hahaha

Mugsy's Place

No, it's not "normal" to "hate" your husband and wish he would "die". Of course there are times when we get angry with our spouse, no one gets along 100% of the time. That's why communication is so important in any relationship. You need to make him understand how his actions make you feel. If you don't tell him, he won't know.

The excitement and thrill we feel in the early stages of our relationship doesn't last forever. Financial pressures and daily stresses take a toll on any marriage. Hopefully the love you shared in the beginning will grow over time and be able to withstand these pressures.

Successful marriages take a lot of work, they don't just "happen". Mutual respect, love and commitment are important in any marriage. I wish you the best of luck.

Simply The Best

No........ I don't even know your husband.

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