Is it wrong for a married woman to be just friends with another man?

blueberry

wouldn't it bother you if it was the other way around?

fat boy

YOU might think you are just freinds , but unless he is gay he will hope for more, your hubby is right to worry he is a man and will know.

Happily Married to my Prince!

Find another friend...female friend. How would you like it if your SO was talking to another woman and you didn't feel comfortable with it? On top of that, what if HE was sneaking phone calls? Why would you even have to sneak them if there really isn't anything going on? It sounds fishy to me. What's more important, your hubby or this guy who doesn't even live near you? Are you saying to can't find ANYONE else to talk to?

Logan

There is an old religious saying that basically says the following. If you feel like you are doing wrong.. you are doing wrong! Is this relationship with the guy worth losing the one with your husband? Turn the tables for a min. If your husband were kee keeing on the phone with another woman, and they were "friends". Would you be ok with it? Now... if he told you that they were just friends and you asked he stop but it continues, would you feel betrayed? Especially if you found out that he was sneaking to call this girl. Would you feel like there has to be something about this person that he won't let go? These are all the things probably going through HIS head..
Maybe you should go to counseling and work on filling that gap that is currently being filled by your friend....

the1andonlytyrese

but you say he's just a friend... You really have feelings for this dude! And right now you need to make a decision what's more important This guy or your husband? I don't think anything is wrong with have a male friend but my husband would have to be okay with it unless they guy was gay

jdrumming

To your question "Is it wrong for a married woman to be just friends with another man?" The answer is of course not.

But what you are describing here is a problem and most married people would have an issue with it. Needing to talk to a guy every day is a little more than just friendly whether you admit it to yourself or not.

I'm with your hubby on this one.

Valerie X Account #19!!!

My husband would not like that at all and call me old fashioned, but my husbands wants and feelings supersedes all others.

That is one of many reasons why our marriage will last until one of us dies- we actually love and respect each other.....we would rather neglect the whole world, than each other.......

JoJo34

I think he has a right to worry, but if he's just a friend and nothing more, stop sneaking phone calls. That's what's making him think that you and your friend are something more. Why don't you introduce them so they can trust each other?

Robin G

Whether or not it's morally correct, the real issue here is that your husband doesn't approve. As a general guideline, if you have to hide something from your spouse, then it's probably something you shouldn't be doing. I found that including my wife in outings with my female friends helped to allay her fears and anxieties over what she percieved to be a threat to our marriage. The more he knows this guy, the less he'll have to worry about what's he's thinking.

Captain S

Let's be honest for a second: Your husband doesn't like it because he realizes that given the opportunity, that guy will sleep with you. Hubby knows it, the guy knows it, and probably deep down inside you know it, too. See, at this very moment I'M the friend in a similar equation. I'm not making any power moves toward her because that would just mess everything up, but I would never turn her away, either. I think she knows that. Truth is, I've never been on this side of the fence before...I can easily see why he (your husband) doesn't like it. His position is significantly weakened the instant you tell your first lie (like sneaking a phone call, perhaps.) Do whatever you will, but at least be honest with yourself about your intentions.

suzanne

If your husband does not like it then you must stop!
These so called innocent relationships never stay that way,and I should know.!
You are disrespecting your marriage-stop it now !

Flossy

I wouldn't hide it, then it seems you have something to hide, if your husband found out things would probably would be much worse, if i were you i would have your friend over and let your husband see you are just friends, if this doesn't work then im afraid you may have to choose, would you be okay if things were the other way around?

sweetsue_2k03

Hi. Having a Male friend isn't a problem at all. However hiding your conversations from your husband is a problem. You are been deceitful and that just isn't right or fair. You need to talk to your husband and reassure him that you love him and him alone but that you enjoy chatting to this friend of yours. however if this friendship is interfering with the relationship with your husband you need to resolve that first. Good luck

Green eyez

I think it's wrong cuz your hiding it from your husband.Don't hide stuff from him cuz what if he finds out and causes a bigger problem between you guys. My husband would freak out if I was talking to a MALE friend. I mean be on his shoes for a second what if he had a female friend that was talking on the phone.I bet you would get mad too.

eagledreams

Ask yourself would you be happy with the situation in reverse hub chatting in same way (you know the content of your conversations with this other man) >
If you can answer yes you would honestly be ok then you should not feel guilty BUT if you would not be happy then hubby has a point in all of this. Personally I would not be happy if my husband spend hours talking on the phone to another woman. Friend ok .....its a fine line you walk tho.

Satanic Brainsmasher

The male friends objective is to get in your pants. It is very wrong. I have had many female friends who have been married. I have slammed
a lot of them.

Complicated

I do not think it's wrong to have a married friend. I do think, however, that what you are doing is not sustainable, long term. At some point, this is going to come to light, and it's going to seem more suspicious bc you're hiding it, unfortunately.

But, being honest about the friendship can cause problems as well, so I don't know what the solution is. I guess you have to find a solution that you can both live with, so you don't have to hide anything. This is a tough situation. Good Luck!!

Kaya M

Simply, there is nothing wrong with having friends of opposite gender if there is respect by both parties. Now, as for the other person who has some insecurities will test you by not being comfortable about the relationship. Even though nothing will happen they believe that it will. Trust issues are hard for them but they think it is all right for them to have those kind of relationships. You can talk to your hubby about and see if you two can come to a common ground or you just might have to let your friend go because of his insecurities. Not a mature relationship at all.

f0xymoron

It's not wrong for you to have a male friend (if indeed that is all he is to you) but it is wrong to be sneaking around. If your husband finds out (and he probably will) it will not look innocent. If you really want to carry on the friendship, then you need to be upfront about it and explain to your husband that he is your friend, and you're not giving him up. You could try getting the two of them together, if you were all friends, life would be a lot easier. But don't sneak around, that is not what marriage is about.

Mrs. Me

I believe its called an emotional affair. Of course hubby is going to be jealous. Ur shareing time, on the phone or not, with another man that he doesnt know like that or is uncomfortable with. Stop it.

good tree

Put aside the right and wrong aspect of it for a while, and think about why your husband is upset. He may have good reason. If you are honest, do you find yourself thinking of your friend in terms you should not? Even if there is nothing romantic openly between you, I know from experience that there is no such thing as truly platonic.

If this upsets your husband, why are you being so stubborn? Surely your marriage, and your husband's feelings, should be more important to you than this friend, especially one you don't see?

Honour your husband's feelings in this, it's absolutely the right thing to do.

LAgirl

I see nothing wrong with my man having a "girlfriend" to talk to. I don't mind BC the 3 of us hang out together sometimes or, just me and her do things together like a "sister".

Where I draw the line is if he talks to her and doesn't tell me about it. Or, if he treats her BETTER than he treats me in conversation.

If nothing is going on and you have a genuine friend who has no romantic interest in you, and vice-versa, say so to your husband and, ask why he doesn't like you talking to him. Better yet, let him talk to your friend too sometimes. If you want to stay friends, let them be friends too.

Keeping things out in the open is the honest & respectful way to go and will make suspicion disappear.

cheer mother

I have a male best friend. We were friends several years before i ever met my husband that i am married to now. I don't see what is wrong with having a male for a friend alot of women do. My husband has alot of female friends as well that he talks to on a regular basis. I am sure some of them were more than just friends. Were you guys friends before you married your husband? Then he should understand. Does he have any female friends, if so ask him about them.If you are feeling more for this man than a friend then maybe, your husband should be worried. If not make him understand that you are only friends.

oh_jo123

that is a thin line but remind your husband if he needs to be jealous of you have you ever given him any reason not to trust you???

giftfromgod

Don't go there honey. If the shoe were on the other foot and your husband was the one having long phone calls with some woman friend you wouldn't like it. the phone bills tell all.

teenie

With each call you get closer to your so called friend you must not respect your husband to go behind his back. Don't get mad when you find out your husband has been going to lunch with a girl he works with it's the same thing.

snack_daddy10

When I was younger I was "friends" with several married women it always went down the same way and the hubby was always hurt by it, if he found out.

Well I have had male friends before, but Because part of society dictates that If you are happy with your hubby and respect him you shouldn't need the company of another man!
Now this friend I have known for many years since childhood, but when I got married I changed a few things
How I make it all copacetic is I never hide it from my Hubby the person comes over but doesnt come over if Hubby isnt home..I out of respect of hubby try not to be alone with friend..I include my Hubby in activities with friend

Julie B

How would you feel if he had a female friend and was sneaking phone calls when YOU were at work - come on be honest?Thats even worse and definately looks like you got something to hide, how would you explain that if he found out????? I would hit the roof!
Stop the sneaking around, invite him to your house so your hubby can see hopefully there is nothing going on.

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