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poohb2878
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Let me answer by asking you this - if your husband came up to you one day and said "honey, you need to lose weight because I cannot stand to look at you" how would you feel? I'm guessing not so good. So instead of telling him straight out why don't you start cooking healthy meals and keeping healthy snacks instead of pop and chips in the house. Instead of watching TV together suggest a walk or learn a new sport together (my husband and I took up tennis and had balls of fun - no pun intended - learning it together). |
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amylynn2114
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wow. yea. you should love him for who he is always.
he is still the same man you married a year ago just with just a few extra pounds. big deal? |
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Poppet
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Why say anything? Your actions can speak louder than any words you could speak. Cook healthy meals at home, and afterwords go for a walk in the park hand in hand. He will think you are being romantic and you both will be getting healthy in the process. |
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♥Sabre♥
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Yes
you shouldnt be uncomfortable around him no matter his weight. you know most men gain weight because they are happy in a relationship -he doesnt tell you anything about your appearance does he? leave it alone |
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Sooner
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Yes |
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Kyleontheweb
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Yes. For better or for worse, you should love your husband no matter how his body might change. |
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lisaartychick
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y dont you just suggest goin to the gym together as like a couple thing to get out of the house!he mite believe that!
good luck!
x |
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magicgee
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- Better or for Worst
I would suggest that you two go jogging together or exercise Together I would not be blunt and say it how you are saying it right now. |
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tcc_00676
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thats communication, i have been trying to do the same thing here no luck and yrs have past by |
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jaiden skylar due anyday ..
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yes it is wrong of u ... u married him for who he is not for how much weight he might gain ... u should be ashamed of urself ... and get ur head out of ur butt .. |
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Lady in Red
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You should love him no matter what. Your no different than any guy who says, "my wife is fat, should I leave her?" |
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Carrie H
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well, there is a different way to deal with it. maybe talk to him about going on walks in the evening, working out together, and cooking healthier. try to change the lifestyle a bit and you and your hubby should be healthier! |
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Lydia
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Yes, it's totally wrong. You are shallow. What a shame that you can't be a loving wife, and that he can't know that you love him for HIM, not the body he is in. Smarten up! It's YOUR problem, not his.... |
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lorianne
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First try fixing only healthy meals and packing his lunch. Research healthy lunch options and making his lunch a real treat. Then ask to take walks together, tell him that you want to get in shape and need a walking partner (a great way to spend time alone one on one). As time progresses, let him know that you think that the both of you are really shaping up and looking great!
If all else fails be truthful, but remember...you did say for better or worse, sickness and in health. |
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Schwinn
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You can start by showing concern for his health and say that you both need to start eating healthier and exercise. It will be easier for him if you are his diet/exercise buddy. |
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missrcbenn
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Well, you have a big problem if you are not attracted to him anymore, and so does he. I think you should tell him. Although I wouldn't want to be in your shoes. He will be hurt and it could go very very badly. Hopefully someone will answer you who has been through this before and they will have good advice for you. Good luck! |
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Rica 82
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No I don't think its wrong, but there are ways to go about it. You can't tell him that he is unattractive because thats not right. I had gained 50 lbs being with my boyfriend and he never treated me differently at all. Never mentioned it. It was me who noticed I needed to lose the weight and I did.
As his wife, there are plenty of things you can do to help him lose weight. Tell him that you both need to lose a little weight or get in shape. For dinner, cut out all those carbs and make yourselves a healthy dinner. Clean out all the junk food in the house, along with any beer. After dinner, suggest a walk around the town or something. He needs to get active. Men lose weight so much easier than women. Go to GNC or Vitamin Shoppe and buy weight loss bills or something for him to lose weight.
Everyone might say you are messed up but the truth is that if it was the other way around, he wouldn't have a problem letting you know that you need to lose weight. Also something I saw on King of Queens, put up a nice picture of him on the refrigerator, so that when he goes to stuff his face, he sees it and thinks twice about it. |
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lcacheermom
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I think that if you approach it as a "health thing" and suggest doing it together, that it will work better. Or you could suggest something like taking evening walks together or jogging together, etc. In a marriage you have to be able to be honest with each other or it will never work. |
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Blunt
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If a woman says it, then poor you having to deal with an overweight husband, and yor are concern about his health.
If a men say it, then they bash him here and tell him shallow, insensitive, rude an mean, to say the least.
Cook healthy meals and exercise with him. Nobody wants their significant other to tell you that you are gross and can;t stand the sight of you.
Good luck |
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Zan
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It's not wrong at all. But since it can be a delicate topic, it has to be addressed tactfully. I think that one of the ways spouses show they care about each other is by taking pride in their appearance, staying fit and well groomed. Of course you won't always look your best at home when you're kicking back and relaxing, but there's a happy medium. I hate the times when my husband slops around the house with a greasy face, messy hair and a semi-dirty shirt, then as soon as it's time to go out he cleans up nice. At least those times are few and far between, and I can't complain about his physique, he's got great abs, biceps, triceps, calves, etc., and works out regularly.
You could always bring up the health aspect and how he'll feel a lot better by staying within the correct weight bracket for his height and build. |
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sinfully delicious
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i think you should talk to him but do it very subtly like maybe the two of you go for a walk in the evening after dinner and make healthier dinners etc without really coming out and saying you're fat lose weight lol |
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Forever & Always
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Omg thats horrible that you are even asking this question. You married this man because you were in love right? You fell in love with him, his personality, the way he made you feel, the way he treated you, etc.... not the way he looked. No matter what you should love him. Just because he's gained 30 pounds doesnt mean that he's a different person. If you aren't attracted to him, maybe you aren't as in love as you thought. |
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Xxzotic
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NO ITS HOW U ASK HIM I THINK U SHOULD JUST EXERCISE WITH HIM AND BOTH OF YOU EAT HEALTY TOGETHER. |
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Jennifer S
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I don't think that it's wrong. Tell him tactfully and express concern about his health, and mention that you're not feeling very amorous towards him like this.
There's a way to do it tactfully and without hurting his feelings too badly(believe me when I say that men get their feelings hurt!!).....you just need to figure out how to do it in a way that he'll react positively to. |
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Partyman
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tell him that he looks out of shape tell him he sould try to go jogging or walking with you !! |
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Lori K
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No, it's not wrong to tell him...just don't turn it into hounding him. |
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Tapestry6
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Your his wife what are you feeding him? Do you make his lunches and dinner? You need to bring fat free food into the house along with making more salads and interesting fruit desserts. You might ask him to check with his doctor and get a cholesterol test and perhaps blood pressure. You don't want to lose him to some sort of physical ailment because you thought you might hurt his feelings.
Also start asking him to take walks with you in the evening 30 minutes a day is the path to a lighter and healthier hubby. |
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Ashley Ann
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Honestly no i dont think that is wrong because you have to tell him how you want him to look weather you 2 are togeather or not just tell him you know i really think that you should lose some weight because i dont want you to be unhealthy and sick i definetly would say something it is what you like not what he thinks or whatever i would tell him before it is too late<3
Good Luck |
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greeneyes_bjb
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It might be better if you suggest that you want to join a gym together or purchase some exercise equipment for your home. Ask him to start taking daily walks with you, and if you're the primary chef in the house, start cooking healthy, low-fat meals and don't buy unhealthy snacks when you grocery shop. He might take that better than just being told "You're fat and you need to lose weight." |
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razzle girl
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aw man...that's hard, i mean, honesty is one this but to ask them to loose wieght to change their phyical appearance isn't quiet...the best thing i can tell you, is you your self go running when he's home, one day and ask him to come, at first he won't most likely go, but do it everyday and somewhere along the line he'll get tired of you leaveing him and he'll go with you...i'm not sure if it'll work and if you even have time to try to do this, but if your that determind, go for it...wow, have fun |
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