Ive been having an affair and want to leave my wife what is the best way without her being hurt?

cammy_pilon

The best way to do it is honestly and in the home. Make sure your bags are already packed. Start by saying something like "(Wife name) you're a great girl but I don't think we are right for each other. I'm just so unhappy with this relationship, and I want to break it off before I do something stupid. You must have noticed I've not been happy and I can't bring you down because of my needs. You're a great person and you deserve someone that will make you happy and I'm not that guy. But I want to let you know that if you need someone to talk too or want to hang out, I'm still your friend and I'll always be there for you as a friend." That way she will feel loved and supported. I beleive that she doesn't need to know about the affair right away since she would already be very hurt. If you feel like you must tell her, tell her once you are living apart.

It's good of you to leave her. You aren't happy and everyone derserves to be happy. The damage is already done so now you have to pick up the peices and rebuild.

She will be hurt tho. Understand that she will be shocked and confused. So try to help her understand that this is good because this way she will find someone that will truely love her.

Leaving is good, but I hope you aren't leaving her for the this new girl. You should live on your own for a while to figure out what to do next. You can still see this new girl but remember that when your married things can quickly go out of hand when you want a divorce. Living on your own will appear that you need space and that's it's not because of another woman.

I hope this helps and I hope all three of you will be very happy soon.

stop seeing the her and stay with your wife....
this new girl will not respect you later on as she knew that you cheat on your wife. He will not trust you as she thinks that you will do the same to her or she will do it to you...
you have a wife who loves you what doyou want more.... you are so lucky and you do not know it
there are so many men who wish to be in your shoe...
think for a sec what are you doing to your life... this is a way that goes to no where but hell
what marriage means to you? does it have any maning
do not rune your life
"The true marriage ..... is this, that husband and wife should be united both physically and spiritually, that they may ever improve the spiritual life of each other, and may enjoy everlasting unity throughout all the worlds of God."

soul child

You should have thought about her fellings before you started sleeping around. You might as well do her like ol boy did his wife in "Diary Of A Mad Black Woman."

jeffo

I agree with the other poster: Suicide would probably be your best option here.

Wha...gees...did I read this right? You want to know the best way to leave your wife after having an affair...WITHOUT HURTING HER???

You are a TARD. Sure, lots of men cheat. Sure, they leave their wives. You want to do this in a nice civil way, WITHOUT HURTING ANYONE,....

LOL!

My suggestion is...get a divorce TOMORROW, make a clean break, and don't offer an explanation. Just say the romance is gone. You are a TARD, so you won't do this.

I already know you'll apologize to her about it and then be proud of yourself for being SO FREAKIN HONEST....LOL!

No seriously, if I can impart one thing on you: Do WHATEVER YOU LIKE. But don't EVER, EVER have children.

Tell me you don't have children,,,

tard,

cute_blondie_angel

I'm gonna be complelty honest with you, because you need to hear it:

What you are doing to your wife is completly selfish, conceited, and hurtful. If you dont want to hurt her, you should have never started an affair. And if you wanted to have an affair, you should have never gotten married.

I am sick of men and women who have affairs, and then up and leave their spouse and say that they 'dont want to hurt them.' Chances are , if you leave your wife for the woman you are having an affari with, the relationship wont last long with the new woman-its just statistic.

Ask yourself why you are having an affair? I would suggest going to counceling for yourself, to improve future relationships, because most cheating spouses have an underlying issue or personal problem they need to get resolved.

And i would also recommen apologizing to your wife for your ignorance, and wasting her time.

piperhound

No matter what you tell her you are going to hurt her. You need to tell her yourself before she finds out from someone else. That would hurt her more then you telling her the truth now.

hotprettywild

tell her be a man,not a mouse,do not let her find out on her own,why did you get married if you cannot keep your zipper zipped?she ought too cut it off and feed it you,do not take vows cause you do not know or have a clue what they mean,wait till the day you see her with someone better than you,i hope it bothers you so bad you cant rest,but a man who cheats has no heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! c-ya hot

Matthew's Mom

She is going to be hurt no matter what you say. Are you sure you want to throw away your marriage? Please think this over before you do anything.

sweatness

DIE.... I despise all men who cheat on their wives.
MEN are DOGS. Think about it, if the shoe was on the other foot. How could she leave you without you being hurt??

fantasylover_04

just get it over with d#p s**t

Wade A

You can't leave someone who loves you with out hurting them.

Where Words Fail, Music Speaks!

she will be hurt because of wat u did
tell her ur sorry
and ask God wat he thinks about it

lizzydawn

There is no way not to hurt her! But you could spare her a little pain and embarrassment by telling her before someone else does. Be honest and take whatever she says or does cause you deserve it.

Erato

Um...yeah, based on what you just said, your just a pig.
Better hurry up and do it so she can find someone better than you...hopefully she'll realize that.
*You can always tell her how great the other woman is (not so great to me since she's banging a married man). She'll defiantly loathe you for the rest of her life.*

YOU ALREADY HURT HER ENOUGH...HURRY UP AND TELL HER. DON'T TRY TO EXPLAIN WHY YOU DID WHAT YOU DID BECAUSE THERE'S NO EXPLANATION NO REASON AT ALL. YOU ARE NOT A MAN AT ALL. IF YOU WHERE FEELING THAT YOU WANTED TO SEEK OUTSIDE THE RELATIONSHIP, YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN MAN ENOUGH TO TELL HER A LONG TIME AGO......WHATS DONE IS DONE GO YOUR MERRY WAY

cstinkerbell6969

I hate to tell you this but there is NO EASY way to tell her this. No matter how u say it its going to destroy her. She has dedicated her life to you and now its all being taken away. She is going TO BE HURT! The best way is just to stop sneaking around and lying to her and sit her down and tell her the god honest truth. Fr once. I know- sometimes marriages go bad. And Im sure there have been signs. She may even already KNOW u r cheating- just does not want to face it. Women sense these things- we r not stupid. BE HONEST with her asap! Dragging it out is only going to make things worse. Tell her in PERSON not some letter or phone call. She deserves this much from you

littlelin72

Too late. I believe you should always have the agreement that if your heart is not in it...let me go first. You chose not to do that, so you are a selfish pig. You should want to crawl in a hole and die. As a matter of fact, why don't you.

TX_Agent_S

You should have told your wife you were unhappy in the marriage BEFORE it got to the point where you began an affair. I am assuming this is not the case, and I apologize if that is inaccurate. At any rate, there IS no easy way to tell your wife without hurting her. The damage is already done. You need to tell her NOW, before she goes any longer thinking things are okay. Who knows? You may be able to change something in your marriage to salvage it. Please take a second look at your marriage before throwing it all away for someone with whom you are having an affair. Good luck.

SWRK student

How would you think--oh I forgot you were not thinking--just leave---------she will be better off in the long run. Well that is what I really want to say, but since you are married, maybe you just need a LOT of help, counseling, therapy--I do not know, you hurt your wife, by lieing, cheating and breaking the trust and faith that she may have had in you------------USE your head--and stop acting like a child-----GROW UP-------and shame on you too

foxycleopatra137

First you you cheat on her. Lame! Then you ask advice on how to leave her from complete strangers? Even more lame! Sorry but when she finds out what you've been up to she might be relieved that it is over. Just tell her ASAP.

lina

Theres no way that she won't be hurt. You could maybe ease the hurt by hiding the fact that you are having an affair. It will hurt like hell if she knows that while she is alone and suffering, you are lying inthe arms of another woman. Maybe just tell her that you need to be alone. And try to hide the new relationship for as long aas possibe.

ali

only a person without feelings won't be hurt. if you don't want to hurt her feelings, stop the affair and get back to her.you still might love her cuz you don't want to hurt her feelings.sometimes you'll find out that you really love and care after leaving, but it will be too late.

Maria

If yours is true love. Want to live with your girl friend with complete honesty. Take your wife out and explain the things to her. But DONT blame her for whatever mess you are into. Accept your fault and seek forgiveness from her. Tell her you will be always there for her as a friend. Any sort of help she needs. Tell her the problem is with you and she is sweet and innocent.

Honey L

Sorry dude she is already hurt. You need to fess up and tell her the truth. There is nothing that you can do or say that she will not be hurt.

Rocket

Sorry you already did.

You need to tell her now. But you already hurt her just by one having an affair and two well not being up front.

genny0132

MORON... shes going to be hurt wether shes still really in love with you or hates you you betrayed her sorry dumb a$$ too late!

leebow0566

Hi, I know from experience that her finding out some other way, than you telling her yourself, will hurt her more than anything. She will be hurt no matter how you tell her, so the best way is for you to be completely honest with her, and soon. you don't want to cause her added pain by prolonging it. Be gentle.

<3

wow! u have a BIG problem well u should admit that you are having an affair and explain that it is because u dont feel the connection anymore...ask for a divorce....

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