Man & Strip Clubs, Need honest answers from Guys.?

Javier169

his body is for you and your eyes only. Yes its cheating and yes your feelings are justified. Just put it this way...what if while he was in vegas...you got drunk and some guy was rubbing you down tehre until you climaxed....I guarantee that he would not like that one bit!

Allison, the Nice Lady

I see no indication in your question that you have any kind of open marriage.

I find it seriously hard to believe that he let a stripper stroke him off in front of a business client. Some weird practices he has there....

If this is outside the agreed upon boundaries of your relationship it's cheating. If it's not, then it's not.

Problem is - you are simulataneously saying "what the hell? no big deal" and "it makes me mad". You can't have it both ways. Either you are OK with such things or you are not.

Personally I doubt this actually happened as you say. Few strippers will give hand jobs to customers and even those who do won't unless they are paying many more $$$$.......

â™¥ â™¥HONESTY RULESâ™¥â™¥

I would be pissed.

I'm totally open to most things, but if I wasn't there, and it's not something that we have an understanding about, I would be SUPER pissed.

Not to mention, that strippers are generally pretty dirty people. Why the hell did he even tell you? I totally wouldn't want to know.

<3

I would get mad. He's MARRIED to you, the only girl who should be touching him like that should be his WIFE and not some stranger. How would he feel if some random guy at a strip joint touched you the way that stripper touched him. So you can go ask your husband that and see how he would feel. And the fact that he didn't even tell her to stop and he enjoyed himself esp the fact that you take such good care for him. You should let it go, he's not going to really understand why your truly mad at the fact that some random girl touched him like that. But I'm telling you, just simply ask him how would he feel if you went to a strip joint and some guy touched me like the way she did to them and MAYBE, HOPEFULLY, he'll come to an understanding. Just be glad it was only a hand job and the fact that he told you that a girl gave him one...so that's a plus. He doesn't hide anything from you.

Kittakatt

Tough question. I would be angry and would probably consider it a form of cheating. Would I get over it, yes if the marriage is good and this is not something that has happened before. The trust is something he will have to earn, since he told you about it you know he was not trying to hide because you would never have known if he did not tell you. So be mad but get over it.

Mr. Man

Yep, he cheated and he is a pig. A strip joint is no place for a married man, but single guys can and should have tons of fun there, not to mention what a waste of money it is. It makes me sick to see married men going to a strip club, i mean have some respect for your wife for crying out loud! I know i would never let some sleazy stripper touch me. Yuck!

sunbun

depends on how you want to handle this....he told you out of love and respect so that he is not hiding anything from you.

If you blow up and make a big deal oversomething he did not encourage...then he will never tell yousomething again.

If this is such a big deal that your marriage could be over...then you need to push the issue and talk

Another question that I don't believe...he let a strange woman whack him off IN FRONT OF A CLIENT????? That part does not make sense...perhaps this floozy of a woman simply touched him and not whacked him off. THINK ABOUT IT.

Rudi A

Married man here, and I went to a club once with my buddies and
a lady came and pulled up her dress in front of me and was not
wearing any panties, but so what . I control my drinking so as my
little head does not out due my big head, and that way I am always
for my wife no matter what. Now I don't even go to any clubs unless I
am with my wife as I enjoy being with her more that with my buddies,
and so what if I lost some male friends, I still have my wife and she
is the one that counts in my life, so men can resist the temptation
if they truly and honestly love their wife, and can do it on a continous
basis.

celticagent

He's a sleaze-ball. Guys that go to strip clubs don't love their wives. It's time to move on to a guy who will love you for you.

Redflower Society

Wow they allow strippers to do that? I didn't know that. But anywho if he's on business why would he be at a strip club? Perhaps you can do a lil stripping yourself and see what he'll be missing out.

No, you are not overreacting at all. That is your husband and the only person that has the right to touch him there.... IS YOU.

Coors

Going to a strip club while married is not a big deal. Getting a handjob from anyone besides your wife IS a big deal.

Real Talk....Ya dig

I understand how you feel, but at the same time, your man is confiding in you like he would a best friend. Women say they want men to open up, yet when they do, we overreact. If he's your best friend, think about how you would behave if she came and told you some freak/nasty stuff that went on. Stay on his butt, but please don't throw this matter up in his face in the future, you'll definitely cause him not to trust you anymore.

Phil K

I'm sure there is more to this than you are telling or more than you know. The fact that he shared it with you probably means he feels bad about it and wanted to come clean (no pun intended) I imagine he wants to be opened and honest and was hoping you would appreciate his openness. I also think its possible it never happened.

Its a beautiful day

Real married men don't go to strip clubs. They should be happy and content with their beautiful wife at home. That is just wrong. I would seek marriage counseling if he doesn't see this as a problem. He should be devoted to you and you only.

Your feelings are VERY justified, But im still having a very hard time understanding the term OPEN MINDED in the marriage!! When two people are married that is supposed to leave them exclusive and for each other ONLY!! I would NEVER be good with my husband going to a strip club, im all he needs and all he needs to look at, if he is not satisfied with it then he should not have gotten married! There needs to be boundaries and in your marriage they definitely have been over stepped, but the question is why? Well saying its ok for your husband to go to a strip club but getting upset when something like this happens makes no sense to me, you are both two adults very much aware of what goes on in a place like this, and if your both are willing to compromise your marriage like this, then it may very well cost you a lot of heartache and pain!! I think you both need to reevaluate your priorities and commitment to the marriage before bigger trouble comes down the road! I wish you all the luck in the world to the both of you!!

pictureshygirl

What do you mean by stroked it? I find it hard to believe that your husband allowed this to happen in front of a client. I think she went and stroked it and nothing more. Which is enough to upset you I can understand. But in defense of your husband, I feel she did not stroke him the way you think she did. A touch maybe, a number of strokes, no. Now, for your husband to be in a strip bar to being with is something you and him have to talk about I have always said, put temptation in front of even a trusting husband and you are asking for trouble.

junkyarddogfan

cheating is a questionable term for this...non-respect for his marriage vows to his wife is more like the answer. he should have stopped her out of respect.

what happens in vegas really doesn't stay in vegas, no matter what any commercial says.

as far as ur thought, and let me quote: "i know that u r drunk and an almost naked vixen wants to finish u, what the hell, right?"...wrong.

goes back to that respect thing and knowing when too far is too far.

lemme tell ya a story...about 12yrs ago i was in vegas with my boss. i had been there many times, this was his first. while watching the outside show at treasure island, he fell in luv with a gal standing there...she had 2 friends with her. all three and he were well on their way 2 being shall we say, tipsy. although he wasn't understanding what they were saying, i had only had 1 drink and could hear completely...the girls were all married, and 2 of them were sister in laws...well anyways they all made plans 2 hit some clubs, and a few beds later. i don't cheat period and despite the fact that i wasn't married or dating at the time, lets remember these 3 gals were married. after the crowd broke up i went my way by choice, they went theirs. at about 3am i heard 1 of the girls banging on my truck cab crying and drunk off her azz...she was crying because he had bedded 1 and she was the sister in law, the gal he bedded was married 2 her brother. she wanted the company phone number 2 call his boss...she didn't know he owned the company. she said drunkeness was no excuse for bedding her brothers wife...funny part about it was she was married 2 and tried 2 bed me earlier in the night...guess what is good 4 the goose isn't necessairly good 4 the gander.

drunkeness is no excuse for anything...everyone should know their limit and not exceed them.

he should have enough respect to sit down and listen 2 ur feelings, it was, we assume a one-time thing and should be treated that way unless he shows something different.

good luck and GOD bless.

Mr O

You're not overreacting at all. As a married man, i have no business or interest in strip clubs. To me, a married man who goes to them for any reason at all doesn't think much of his marriage and needs to re-evaluate his priorities. I think you've been good to try to be understanding, like maybe he was drunk and wasn't thinking clearly, although he was still in a strip club and in a situation he never should have put himself in as amarried man. What he did was utterly disrespectful to you, your marriage, the entire family, and also completely shameful! Maybe he'll say the customer really wanted to go, but still, customer over disrespecting wife and marriage? i think not.

pleasetiemeup814

Better question, why did he tell you about it? Obviously he wants to come clean and thinks enough of you to tell you about it...... I'd never be able to tell my wife if that happened. I think you've got a good guy there, maybe instead of being mad at him, you should give him a reward for trusting your marriage and its strength to come out and tell you this? Maybe YOU should give him that night again, except you be the stripper!

hEaRt on mY sLeEvE;(

its hard to not be offended by this. as long as he understands this bothers you and respects that, then let it go. god....they are all the same:(

California SunShine

well, if it bugs you, you obviously need to talk to him about it. let him know that and that it is wrong to let another woman-hot stripper or not-to touch him in that way.

JOEY F

I definantley see your concern, I can also understand you being upset. He did respect you enough to tell you. If I were you I would ask him to talk to you about it again, during the conversation you should tell him that that is unacceptable, and ask him not to go to another club without you. He inturn should be as acceptable about that request as he expects you to be about what happened. After the conversation you should just drop it, so get it all out and never mention it again!

carlyjj941

hummm.. you and him and only you and him define the limits on what is acceptable and not acceptable for you and him in your realationship.. personally if you are good to him and he oviously takes care of you.. then let it go.. and i say this because.. what would trully hurt and bother me is if he actually had feelings for this chick or there was love behind the actions.. (plus these actions cant result in a baby or std).. but what i would be careful to is being to easy going about it and in the future it might go further.. BUT the key thing here is.. it is bothering you!! let him know it upset you.. give him the old well what if a guy did that to me speech.. see how he reacts.. but me personally going off what you said.. i would let it go.. i mean the man was open enought to tell you right? he's not gonna run off and leave you for this girl... shes just a stripper... they do those things..

Look Away, I'm Hideous

you are overreacting, she was only interested in the "tip" ha ha ha

studente_1

Let it go. Guys don't always think with the big head. At Least he was man enough to tell you he went. It does not have anything to do with you or anything, but sometimes you get an idea in your head and it is strong enough to follow through. I mean actually getting to the Strip club. He should have stopped before it went that far tho...

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: