Married for almost a year thinking of divorce?

Violet Pearl

Take the TV out of the bedroom.
Maybe it "breaks down" when she's not home one day.

Mr. Taco

That's it? That's why you want a divorce? Huh. Have you tried marriage counseling? If not, you have not exhausted all possible methods for resolving this problem, and thus are not really ready for a divorce (unless you're just too immature to be married in the first place). I highly recommend making an appointment today. It is a LOT cheaper than a divorce, I can tell you that! Good luck!

â™¥JeJeâ™¥

Take the TV out &
Talk to her more

The Wife

Marriage is 100% compromise. I don't hear you being compromising, I hear you telling her what to do. Be downstairs with me and not upstairs. If you can't compromise on something as simple as this and if something as petty as this is making you consider divorce, then perhaps you weren't ready to be a husband yet.

RAIL

Meet her in the middle and do it on the stairs Mon - Fri

mdpi

b4 u get a divorce maybe u should see a marriage counselor. or maybe if u go up to her she may eventually see things ur way and/or compromise and come downstairs. hope this helps good luck!

Kristen

what if you made plans in the evening?
Take the inititve! Make dinner, bring home a movie.
Maybe she is tired after work and wants to relax.
If she sees you are making an effort, she's likley to step up.

Don't give up!

Chicken Jones

Marriage is work, and involves selfless compromise.

rkrell

Maybe you two should alternate every other day.

NorseArcher

i'm reading this as: you're thinking about divorce b/c she won't come greet you when you get home. is that right? why does she have an aversion to being downstairs? is she depressed that she spends her afternoon in bed watching tv? seems like there's a bigger issue here... can you at least start by swapping days" M- you go up; T - she comes down, etc. i think it's a much bigger issue. if you're thinking divorce b/c of it, you need to figure out what the underlying issue is first. have you thought about marriage counseling?

good luck!

Tifanie

You can't work it out? This scares me. I am 15 and the world today alll ends with divorce I am scared of marraige. Talk to her and tell her you would like to improve the marraige and tell her you feel like the relationship has hit a dead end but you still want to turn it around and that you are not giving up on it just yet. The first year is always the hardest due to adjustments. Give it some time. Please.

Simply Lovely

You need to compromise in marriage. Pick your fights wisely. If she wants to lay in bed after work, so be it, but don't stop living your life.

Zormis

So try spending time in bed with her watching TV, you guys need to learn to compromise, some days you lay in bed with her, other days she comes down stairs with you. If you can't agree, go out drinking eventually she will pay more attention to you.

Anji

She may be depressed...

You should communicate more and look into her mental state. Depression can turn your world upseide down but you married her and now you have to investigate why she is so tired.

Good luck.

gram

Do you honestly think that you can live like that for the rest of your life? Will you be happy about the way your life is staying just the way it is? I am not telling you to divorce her, that is your choice, what would it be like if there were children in the house? The same?
In the end it is your decision, but don't live your life being lonely and unhappy.

white ranger omg

Your thinking about a divorce over that? Get your priorities straight, thats a pathetic excuse to divorce someone. If you dont love her then thats a good reason but this is suppose to be the women you love so deal with it talk it out with her come to an understanding or agreement.

Dude

Maybe she wants you to come up there and lay it to her man..give her some good lovin. Call her on your way home and have her meet you at the bottom of the stairs for some 'stress relief'. You give it to her good enough and she'll do whatever you want man.

btw, that's about the dumbest reason ever that I've heard of someone wanting a divorce.

random smile =)

marrige is a fragile thing. God only wanted us to marry the one we wanted to spend the rest of our lives with. i dont think that you should divorce this woman but merely make some changes like putting the tv upstairs in the place where u would like to talk to her downstairs. the most important thing is to go to church and pray about it!

**good luck!!~

madcityd0623

maybe you should go up and talk with her there. Why are you right.

runningmeg82

Is that the only reason you're thinking of divorce? I'm sure you can find a solution to this... What if you told her you were going to bring home a yummy dinner tomorrow night and you'd like to eat together. Then maybe another night rent a movie you can both watch in bed... can you try organizing things to do to spend time together? Some of the things can happen downstairs while other times you can do something with her upstairs.

Do you think she is depressed since she is in bed so much?

solar

I am sorry to hear that after one year things are not going well. I will start by saying I have been married nine years and the first few were the hardest. You guys are still adjusting to living with the one another and figuring out that things you once thought were cute are really annoying as h e l l . I would guess the "honeymoon" has worn off by now. If you and your wife can't talk this out I would suggest either marraige counsleing or if you attend church a pastor to speak to. Just don't let divorce be your only option. Divorce should be your last resort especially since you have only been married a short time. Good Luck!

King H

This sounds like a matter of compromising. If it's SO important to you why don't you just go and speak to her about your day. It's not that she doesn't care, but some people just like to wind down when they get home. They need that in order to recharge. Trust me as someone who needs to wind down when they get home, your marriage will last a lot longer if you just let her relax.

Penelopebabi

stupid ****** bother me with a real question! more like have a real question for me to answer. thats why u wanan divorce. maybe shes tired from work too u did say she got home at 4:30 right. leave her alone. that something ur going to have to deal with .. not everything will be perfect

flashheart

ahhhh true love

move out now before the baby comes...

person_12341

Question: is your love worth throwing away over something as stupid as where you talk at?

Sit down and talk with her about how you two have conflicting opinions. Make a comprimise. Spend 1/2 the time downstairs 1/2 the time upstairs.

Good luck

wthrgrl

I feel like this problem could be fixed by going to a marriage counselor. I have heard they can be very helpful. Maybe they can help your wife realize that you want to spend some quality time with her. A divorce is a stressful process and I really think this problem can be fixed without getting a divorce. If you both still love each other, I'm sure things can get back to normal with a little help.

Hewie

well u could comprimise and sometimes come upstairs and watch tv with her and other times she can be down stairs waiting for u cooking.

CaptainKrunch

throw her the salami at least three times a day and make her beg for more.... when shes begging dont go upstairs, make that crazy hag come downstairs and put it in dabutt!!!

Sandy Ego

If this is a major change within the last year, I would look into medical reasons. I don't know what other things she has going on in her life - is she stressed out, depressed? Is she on any kind of medication that would affect her mood or energy levels?

If this is how things have been the whole time you've known her - well, you made your bed sounds like.

Gun Dream

Staying in bed for so long is a sign of depression. So is watching too much TV.

IMHO, you should mail (not email, snailmail) her an invitation to a dinner downstairs for friday night, set a romantic candlelit dinner, and fall in love with each other again. It shouldn't always be about TV upstairs or downstairs. I am sure you used to do fun things when you were going out, maybe go to the movies? Bowling? A few beers? dancing, whatever. After a year, it seems like you two have fallen into a routine.

If she does make the effort of accepting your invitation for dinner, then you know she wants to work it out. If she denies you dinner at your own home, then she's not even willing to make an effort, and it's time to reevaluate your marriage, and let her know you are not willing to spend the next 50 years with a TV zombie. She either get's help for her condition, or she get's the TV, and only the TV when the divorce is final.

Take that thing out of your bedroom.

Mai Tai

Your wife relaxing and watching TV is not something worthy of a divorce. She may have really hard days at work, and wants to chill out when she gets home. You need to focus on what really matters...Is she a good wife otherwise? Is she a good mother (if you have children)? Does she respect you, treat you right? Does she contribute to the household (e.g. paying bills, housework, etc) Is she honest, faithful, trustworthy, loyal to you? Does she love you?

My advice is to continue to work with her, and on your relationship because just like you, she is human, and not perfect. I'm sure there are things about you that drive her crazy, and you don't see her running to divorce court. Work on your marriage and you will see the payoff.

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