My boyfreind cooks dinner for all his friends, but not me?

Cyclist 2300

I think he started doing this.... because of the arguement that you had...... he is trying to piss you off.

and it looks like it is working........

if this is how your boyfriend treats you..... I'd pack up and leave..... find someone better..... who treats you with R E S P E C T.

Why are you so defensive about his friends? Whether you realize it or not, you have created a huge rift between you and him because he's got to juggle you and his friends constantly. Stop nagging and complaining about how he doesn't cook you dinner...and he might actually cook you dinner one night. He doesn't tell you he's going out with his friends because of the way you are reacting to them. Stop being jealous (seriously...you think your bf is gay because he's got a guy friend around....that's pretty weak...what do they do, play xbox?)...and start seeing the big picture....if you don't accept his friends, and keep badgering him about dinner/hanging out...he will keep doing what he's doing, the rift will get bigger, and he'll leave you. Get real lady, stop being psychotic over this minute crap....it's not like he has a drug habit or is cheating on you....be happy with what you got...some people do not have anyone to nag about meaningless crap....

it's not about how he treats his friends, it's about how you are treating HIM....treat him with some respect, and less angst, and you'll see different results...

Cutemum3

It sounds to me he is being really fake with these people and trying to win them over.

Bilinda G

Sounds like a control issue myself. He is showing you he can do it but own his own terms. My advice is to have a sit down and discuss the issue with him. No yelling or accusing just a nice sit down. If the problems can't be resolved you will either live with it or leave.

mullen1200

Sit down and ask him why. Maybe he doesnt really like you. Maybe he just needs a break.

Billie

Sounds like you are just a roommate and not a girlfriend.

teenie

You really don't no i find that hard to believe. You need to back off a little if you don't you are going to loss him. Does he tell you your to pushy and possessive. You need to remember your not married so you need to stop acting like you are because that is the quickest way to loss your boyfriend.

Ze Jamaykin

he's bored and doesn't think you're that important enough for him to wanna help cook dinner or clean the house for.

iSkeetSkeet

Maybe if you could be a friend to him in the relationship he might treat you better. Stop nagging him and he might just turn the corner with you.

jayne62224

maybe hes trying to prove something to you now
or maybe make you jealous depending on his type and maturity
but i advise you to just sit down with him..dont raise your voice.. be sure to tell him you ARE NOT attacking him.. and tell him how you feel and what you would like to change

sweethart <33

well talk with him and ask who these people really are.
you dont want to jump to conclusions; that will make your relationship even worse.
maybe he's trying to impress them for something.
try to understand him.
best of luck !

abc

you are too young and immature to be playing house hon........listen.....crap this is the same thing your mom anddad have told you....day after day..........get a life hon....now while you are young and unmarried.......

Nancy M.

It sounds like your boyfriend thinks more of his friends than he does you. What you could do when the friends come again for a meal is to make plans to leave and then go somewhere by yourself or else go with a girlfriend.

Camille M

Just tell him how you feel about the situation. If he still cooks for his friends and not for you, then you might have to drop him like a basketball.

Ooga Booga

Why are you still living with him?? Y'all are sooooo dysfunctional!

H~mÃªÂ®

Sorry--- he is not your Mr. Right.

c l

You should really sit and talk to this person one to one, and tell him how you feel, in a way that is not judging or generalizing, be very specific, and ask to work toward a compromise. I recently felt the boyfriend I had, was not giving me 100% that really hurt me, and I explained to him why I felt that way and he ended up telling me that he could not give me 100% and leaving the relationship. I was really hurt, but at least was able to stand up for treatment that is important to me and open the possibility for being with someone else who will fulfill me instead completely the way I deserve! Good Luck :)

nolongerhere

You cook for him and his friends but put lots of laxative in the food

Jessica M

Sit him down and calmly explain to him what you just wrote.... try asking him without being acusatory and see how he reacts. If the conversation turns negative, you may want to consider ending the relationship....after all if you end up married do you really want no help for the next 50 years?

On the other hand he may surprise you and have a perfectly good explanation for why he hasn't helped out. Either way, you need to chat with him. Good luck!

venus_in_furs

He sounds horrible. Sorry, im sure he's lovely. He's doing it on purpose to annoy you, either that or he's heard food is the way to a mans heart and is hoping it will get his mates in the sack, but im sure its the first. Don't cook him food again until he starts showing you some respect. Have your own friends over- cook a feast and not let him have any of it...oh and hire a hunky male stripper to entain you....this should make him start trying to impress you again with romantic meals.

Pugglez

yeah i think thats pretty mean. it does sound like a little revenge scheme but i doubt it would go on for too long, and by what you say it sounds like it has been going on for a while...i think hes just an a$$ and you should find someone that has more respect for you :)

Jewel J

It obviously has to do with the fight, whatever that was about (I'm guessing it had something to do with him not ever making dinner or cleaning up). So now he has decided from it that he will make dinner and clean up, but not for you, that you somehow don't deserve that from him but that you do deserve not having to wait on him in that manner. I also imagine that he is cooking for these other people as a way of saying that if you hadn't been so petty about the way you presented the problem in the fight with him, then you would have been able to enjoy this as well. That he is able and willing to cook for more than himself and clean up to, but only will for those he deems worthy.

EDIT: Well, if you can eat with them then why are you saying he cooks for everyone BUT you? He is excluding you, he just isn't making you exclusive. So quit lying. If you don't eat what he makes, whether it is just for you or for you and others, then that is your fault and your doing. You are the one being disrespectful. You are being selfish and immature, too. You yell at him for not cooking and cleaning up, then when he does it you still aren't satisfied because you aren't the center of attention.

chic momma

Yeah, from what you wrote, it sounds to me he doesn't respect you or care that much. even if he is a bad cook, and doesn't want you to know it, he could still at least clean up.

mimi

This is the marriage and divorce section. You should probably be on the singles site.

ya think?

lol

Rin C

Either it's A. A guy thing or B. He doesn't think he has to share it with you.

You shouldn't let him walk all over you like that. Try talking to him first, since he won't know what you want or how you feel if you don't like... State it outright. I mean, a fight's a fight, but if he doesn't "hear you clearly enough" then make sure he knows it. Stop doing his chores and making dinner for him too. You're not obligated to do it.
About that male friend of his, I don't think he's gay, really, unless he starts acting really odd. You could ask him, though he might take offense.

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