My boyfriend ended our 5year relationship 3weeks after i gave birth to our son. what did i overlooked in 5yrs?

captures_sunsets

It sounds as though he wasnt ready to become a father, but the thing is if everyone waited until they were 100% ready there would be no children on earth. just give him some time to adjust to parenthood, this is an adjustment time for both of you. Just hang in there, enjoy that beautiful new little boy and try to sleep when he sleeps. Good Luck! Best Wishes for you and your new son.

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Obi-wan Kenobi

Duh, you should have been married. This is God's way of saying that what you did was wrong. Now that child will probably never know his/her father. And, you'll end up on welfare or something. My heavens, can't you young people grow up and leave the breeding to the smart people.

beautiful_brat

i agree with pianoabuser. Having a kid might have scared him. but as for the cheeting, no thats not right. he should have at least told you. you can find someone who'll treat you better than that, but you have a kid now, so you have to make sure they treat him right to. good luck girl with everything. i wish you the best of luck. your son to. i'm really sorry. just be strong for your son's sake.

Butterfly

He just scared right now need someone to talk to him about his life.It is not your problem just take care of your baby boy now.

smartypants909

You say you dated for 5 years, did you talk about the future, getting married, having children, your life together, and your hopes and dreams? It doesn't sound like you want the same things. Your most important thing to do now is be a mother to your son, and take the boyfriend to court for child support, don't let him off the hook as far as his responsibilities go.

pianoabuser

He probably didn't want kids.

themanwhorides

no more on hishands than he can take dump him and carry on

â™«â™ªbludaisyâ™ªâ™«

He saw that kids really DO change everything. It's easy for them to run but we can't. Sorry. Sounds like a chump to me. Take his money for the next 18 yrs and tell him to kiss yo' butt!

Slick Rick

There are a lot of single moms out there. Some guys do not want to take the responsibilities of raising a child. Some may not be ready to have children.

ambardenice

Maybe he wasn't that serious you know. A child take a lot of work and maybe he wasn't willing to do his part.

lilmiss

Well, about your boyfriend, it is really sad that he feels this way, and I wish it wouldn't have happened to you. I honestly feel that the best thing to do right now is become strong, if not for yourself, for you baby! Did you know that a mother being depressed can affect her baby, even before you think you are communicating. The baby can feel it, which makes the baby crankier, and then you in response to the baby will get frustrated and it is a vicious circle. You need to be happy, confident and pleasant around your baby. This is a VERY sensitive time for him. Good luck, it sounds like the dad still wants to be a part of your sons life at least?

monkeytail_77

i don't know honey...but i know one thing...you and your son are the most important thing in the world...look after the two of you...bump everybody else...

*****

You overlooked getting married.

sparkie

Maybe he was just not ready for the whole father figure thing. That is something that u can not talk out of them if they're not ready, and you should have made sure that u were both ready before you brought another person into this world!

southernlisa37

You are better off without him. You were together for five years and even after you gave birth to his child, there was still no committment. Do you really want to be with someone like that? You and your child deserve soooo much better than that!!!!

shae

he wasnt ready for a family, Im sure he does really care about you since he didnt want to traumatize you emotionally while you were pregnant by ending it then. Well at least he finally ended it and didnt continue living a lie. Just take care of you and the baby right now thats what you really need to focus on. If you have family or friends that can help you out and watch the baby for a couple of hours so you can catch up on some much needed rest. Both your body and your mind are in a state of shock right now so as soon as you start feeling better physically you can then work on the emotional part. Good luck!

starrblazing

He didn't want a baby and probably felt you were trying to trap him.Or he did care but didn't see a future with you and wanted to let you down easy.But better make him take care of his son financially.

TrueMetal

Hes commitment-phobic. This situation is just too much for his scaredy butt, he needs to sack-up and take care of his son. You really need to go to family counseling. This will bring the real issues out in the open to weather this relationship between you can actually be "fixed" but most importantly bring to light that he is a puss and needs to be there for his son!

monycka

HE DIDN'T LOVE YOU AND NO KIDS WERE PLANNED...

thehuntress

Some men are jealous of the attention a baby gets. The feel they have to compete with the baby and their feelings toward you changes. My hubby was the same way.

You may be better off without him. Try to stay focused on takig care of your baby. Arrange your schedule to sleep when the baby sleeps day or night and enlist your family or friends to babysit for short periods of time. Visit your gyn to make sure it doesn't turn into post-partum depression.

I threw my hubby out when my daughter was 5yrs old. I never regretted it.

It is very difficult to understand that or to get use to a father behaving that way. It took me years to stop being angry.

Now that she is an adult he wants to establish a relationship with her but she rejects him everytime. He constantly calls and begs to get her to talk with him but its too late.

Good luck to you, things may seem dark now but I'm sure you will love your baby so much and the pain will lessen with time.

maryj

don't blame yourself or wonder why... you have a lovely kid to care for

Austin

I'm sorry to hear that your boyfriend broke up the relationship with you. One the one hand, I think he's not man enough to take care of the baby that he brought into this world. One the other hand, he's an irresponsible father to your baby, escaping the responsibility of further supporting his son, being there for him growing up. It's gonna be hard now to raise a kid, especially you are not married, thus you can't get a child support if paternity has not been established. He's no different than a playboy spreading his seeds around among women. You should judge for yourself to see if this is the right man I want to spend the rest of my life with.

All the best to you. Be strong.

Gran Gran

This is so stupid. Hello??? Ding Dong anybody home? Five years and no committment? You should have never made a baby with him. He was using you. Why buy the cow when the milk is free. Ever heard the term shack up honey? This is what happens when you shack up with somebody.

Give your baby up for adoption so he can have a intact family. Then you need to go to school and get some training so you can have a nice life.

What a mess you created. Good luck you really need it.

haydemi

first, it seems you may have post partum depression -take care of that now-.
second, if he was having an affair then you didn't do anything wrong, he did.
you don't need him to survive, even if it feels that way.
if he wants to be part of his sons life then excellent. if he doesn't keep his address updated for child support issues. it is the law and your sons right to get child support.
please get the support you need and best wishes

Ruby

You don't need him. He's not a good boyfriend & he's a bad father. He's actually not being a father at all. Keep him away. You'll find someone.

Ask your doctor about the colic. Have friends or family sleep over to help you with the baby. Good luck.

bluecat

you overlooked the fact that he never loved you. that you were convenient. my advice to you is to not take him back when he wants you too. he will only leave again. next time use birthcontrol

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