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theworkingmama
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It's because you're both comfortable, emotionally, physically, and probably financially. After five years, you've learned to depend on eachother for everything you need, and it's very hard to lose that co-dependancy and stand on your own.
I bet you don't hate eachother; I bet your relationship has hit a bump, and you need to rekindle the romance and remind yourselves why you are together in the first place. People who genuinely hate eachother would never make it to 5 years.
I used to think I hated my husband, too; we've been together 5 years as well, and it took me almost as long to realize that we just needed to remind ourselves why we love eachother, why were in this relationship, and that we still do love eachother more than anything in the world. |
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agraceful
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I'm sorry :( Maybe take a break for a while, but when you take a break BE VERY CLEAR on the boundaries and ground rules. Don't talk at all, you need time a part. It's like you guys have been married since you've been together that long. After the break, try to rekindle your relationship by seeing each other maybe once a week, and increasing it from there. Try to start your relationship a new, having to go through every relationship experience again. But thats only if you want to get back together. I'm a romantic so whatever I can do to keep a relationship stable and flowing, I will. Best of luck to you<3 |
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Asmodeus
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ONE word: "Insecurity."
Honestly. That's it. |
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wisegirl74
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If you hate each other and don't leave is becuase you do love him and you don't want to leave. So I think if you are really not happy you should just leave the man before you get older nowadays is very dificult to find someone. So think fast. |
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feldco
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although I want to help...its hard to answer your question because we dont know how your using the word hate. If i could say something though I would say that if he doesnt love you or doesnt appreciate you...find someone who loves you and appreciates you for even the little things you do. A goal you could set is to find a way to make you relationship work of find someone else. |
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Dallasfan4life
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There is no good answer to this question. my parents hate each other and have do so for 21 years, but the still love one another. there relationship and yours can't be healthy. you should talk to you boy friend directly about this question. stress and hate shortens your life. |
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smithxx1
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it will take u a while to get over him. just keep ur mind off of it. |
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Bryan (Hammerogod)
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Trust me when I say that I don't think it is funny.
You are hurting and you need to step away and see if you can get along without eachother.
Life goes on.
You will be shocked to find out how good life can be after you get out of a truly bad situation...and how quickly it can get back on track after the dead weight is cut out of your life.
BTW:
He is not your Boyfriend...he lost the friend part...he is just a boy now. |
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Giselina
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People are afraid of change....but change is good. Go for it! Make the first move and leave. You will not regret it. |
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iltmaemc
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move on and stay single. no drama and you will experience peace and happiness. relationships are over rated. we are expected to be in a relationship, but it is not the true path to happiness. freedom is |
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breenie
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Thats really sad if you both really hate each other it is time to move on with your life and as hard as it is now to leave it is going to be even harder if you wait 5 more years |
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kathyw
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Ask him if he hates you. Ask yourself if you really hate him. It may be that under all the 'hate,' there is love. Once you start talking about it openly, maybe you both will see that. Or not. |
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lilbuttonose
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have a serious sit-down convo with him and see where he stands and what he thinks your guys' future holds. if he can't really formulate an answer for the latter, i would suggest that you bring up your concerns. it's better to quit wasting each other's time. it's best to break up if you are both feeling mutual...always easy to stay friends in that situation (if you guys believe in that). i've never broken up with a guy and stayed friends with him afterward; personally, too much drama. anyway, continue to be honest with yourself and what you really want in life, whether that person is a part of it or not. |
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kk
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You hate him, he hates you???? I really do think you need to move on then unless you believe that this relationship is possible to work out.
I think you should sit down and talk to your boyfriend - communicate how you feel and what you guys should do to better your relationship. Should you guys work it out or let it go.
Communication is key.
Don't let the 5 years be the main reason to be in the relationship. |
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proventer
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Nothing wrong with that. Hated is part of a couple lives. It is better if one of you is willing to solves the hated. Then again do what you find you need to do in order to gain the happiness you want in life. |
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jar
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Well it's obvious that you two need to end it and move on from each other. Be proactive and end it! If you don't, it sounds like he may never get around to it and you two will remain unhappy.
I can understand how you two would feel so attached to each other after 5 years, but if you aren't happy then it's worth the risk to not be with each other.
So.. just end it and try to move on and be happy! |
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FreeSkier87
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I was in the same predicament. My ex-girlfriend and I went out for four years and yes we did get along perfectly but then other times we hated one another. I would break it off. Don't be afraid of not finding someone. As the saying goes; "maybe it just wasn't meant to be" - is really true. If it's made to work out, it will in the end.
Good Luck. |
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CHILLY
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you won't explore new world if u fear coming out of ur home.........move ahead if there is nothing left in ur relation but only if NOTHING LEFT,
it cud be possible that only u are feeling this way so all u need is to talk to ur BF and decide what u want from each other ,if nothing then just part away in good spirit............like good friends.
But i feel u still love him or u don't ahve courage to leave him.....if u are sure he hates u then pls don't crush ur self respect move out with garce.
Life is not so small |
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adamie
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Best advize is do what u feel like doing |
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Mark P
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the obvious thing for you to do is break up
use some common sence woman |
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CiCi
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The best thing for you two to do is have a nice long, honest talk about how you really feel about each other and your relationship. Perhaps you can part amicably and remain friends. |
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edward r
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kill him and bury each individual body part in different parts of the country. then run to the police station and say"i know noone has seen my bf in a while but i didn't chop him up and bury him all over the country. i swear you can trust me". |
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Danielle B
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sorry but you should just end it. i mean maybe youll be alote better just friends. if not then spice it up some. any if so you brake up with him then be nice like have talk with him saying we can be friends. thinkgs like that. but you might want ot be nice if you do brake up with him.there are many people out there for you that loves you im sure and if he don't why you still with him? |
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I'm weird, ugly, and cute!
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Don't hang on to a sinking ship. It will hurt more and more with time going by and you will hate each other instead of being able to break up civilly |
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alexyvettea
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Its probably bc you haven't talked to any other guys in a long tme, so you don't know how it is to with someone else. You should try going to a club, internet dating to see it you would be happier with him, or other guys you might meet. In the mean time break it off for some time to see howed it be. |
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♥ღ♥ Finally Got My Miracle ♥ღ♥
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Just break up and get over it. Your just hurting yourselfs more by staying in the relationship longer. Good luck. =] |
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Katie H
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depending on you career, age and things you may need to move away to tear your self away. my sister left state for 3 months to get a way from a relationship like that, my other sister has been in one for 15 years now and he is even in prision and she still goes and sees him and says she doesn't want to be with him but she doens't move on, so I guess you would need to decide what you want your future to be like, full of pain and daily regret or freedom and happiness and make your decision and take action.
get a friend to help you brake away if needed just find something and move on, because he will if he find another girl and you will still be hanging on to him and the brokeness will be nearly unbareable. |
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Brett H
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this video might help you think a little more clear and with a different perspective. its 44 seconds and I promise it has a point. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jmsw0DLSMa4 |
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Tyra
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i understand where you are coming from. you have gotten used to eachother and thats normal to fear change, my advice is to break up and just date around a little bit. get into lots of hobbies and you will make a lot of great connections. you both will be a lot happier!!! |
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MARY S
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TOXIC ATTRACTION?? WELL IT WORKS FOR SOME....
HATE IS LOVE UND LOVE IS HATE....A SPIT IS A KISS UND A KISS IS A SPIT
I THINK YOUR FEELINGS ARE MASQUERADING AS HATE WHEN THEY ARE REILY LOVE |
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