 
|
Moosha
|
If he is that shallow then I would say dump him...you don't need to lose weight for him, if you want to lose weight for you then do it but he sounds like an ***. |
|
tumbleweed1954
|
Dump him! Then lose the weight but don't go back. |
|
Natty
|
It sounds like that not only is your boyfriend a douche but he's also emotionally abusive. He should not put you down. You have children. Gaining weight happens. You should either seek couples' counceling (with a little extra for him) or leave him. You deserve someone who will treat you well and appreciate you...extra weight and all!!!! |
|
kane
 |
You should have left him 3 years ago especially since you have been giving him children. If a man doesn't marry you by the 5th year he has no intention of doing so. I know it hurts but let him go.
How much does he weigh? 180, 160 lbs or whatever...As soon as he leaves that'll be the dead weight you lose immediately and the rest will be a piece of cake. If you let a man use you ...HE WILL.
He's looking for excuses to justify his bad behavior. |
|
MicG
|
Never change yourself to please someone else...be happy with who you are and change when you are ready. Focus your time on positive relationships and let the negative ones dwindle to the roadside. Good luck to you and be a good role model to your kids...don't ever let them see someone using you as a door mat! |
|
Hope4sunnydaze
 |
I am sure you are at your wits end with this situation. You have alot of time invested with this man and have 2 children. But what a @$$% hole for making you feel this way. I dont know if you have a daughter with him? But if you do would this be except able if her husband or boyfriend treated her this way? If you do want to work this out and you are the only person that can answer that question. Start going to the gym, leave the kids with your husband its the least he could do if he wants you to lose weight. And when you come back tell him the personal trainer at the gym is a great looking, supportive, and give you so much positive energy you cant wait to go back to the gym again. Its just a suggestion. See how that flys with Mr. Downer.. |
|
notyochic
|
hello you are not fat you are thick and i will say there are a lot of men out there who love thick women let the a.s.s. hole leave you why would you want to be with him if he doesn't except you for who you are kids or no kids you and the kiddies would be better off besides do you want your kids to grow up and think like there dad?? i bet if you leave him you would be a lot happier and maybe not that you need to but maybe you will loose some of that weight!! |
|
tx_desert_rose_1988
|
girl you have 2 kids! you can't be expected to be Jenna freakin' Jamison! if you want to save the realtionship, talk to him about it. Tell him he hurts you when he puts you down. tell him you need his support. 8 years is too much to throw away for 40 lbs. If you dont want to be with him, there's no point in being depressed and stressed over this. Honestly, he doesnt seem worth your time or tears to me. I dont think he should leave you b/c of your weight. But if you want to lose it, you should. To make you happy. Not to make him happy. And if he wants to stay and you want him to, great. But if you do it, do it for you. |
|
married2004
|
Your boyfriend sounds like a real winner. I'd sure like to have one like him. Gee- my husband constantly compliments me and is always telling me how beautiful he thinks I am. Can we swap? I'm getting sick of all the compliments and think I'd really like someone who constantly puts me down and belittles me and always makes me feel like a piece of sh*t. |
|
wildone
 |
tell your boy friend that your leaving him because he's stupid |
|
Samantha R
|
screw him!!!! If you are happy with yourself it should not matter. You should leave him. If he does not love you for you then why waste your time. I`m sure there are plenty of guys out there that will love you for the things that really matter. Do what ever makes you happy because you only have one life to live and you should not waste time on people that don`t love you for you(all of you) |
|
rimu
|
before he dumps u, u go and dump him. if he should love u, he should love u for your innerself, not how u look like, or how u dress up. he was nit the one for u |
|
♥missflorida♥
|
Kimpossiblevega's right.......you don't want a guy who only cares about what you look like......you want someone who loves you for you. Dump this loser straight away. |
|
Steph
|
I was with a guy for 6 1/2 years. We didn't have any kids but I did gain weight.
You had 2 kids, you're allowed to put on weight. Has he been giving you signs that he isn't interested anymore? I would say, first and foremost, talk to him. You've been together for 8 years, you two should be able to communicate with one another. Simply tell him how you're feeling and see what his reaction is. If it's a negative one and he says that he just isn't attracted to you anymore and it is in fact cause you did put on weight then leave him cause he's an ***. In my case, I left him. He said he was attracted to me and loved my body yet never brought me out anymore, like he was embarassed to be seen with the big fat girl. He was an *** and if your man does the same to you then leave his ***. There are better MEN, not "boys", out there that will LOVE LOVE LOVE your body the way it is and will treat you like gold. If you choose to lose the weight let it be because you really want to for yourself and for no man! I hope everything works out for you. Don't let a man control you, your heart, or your mind.
good luck, remember you have two beautiful babies and that's all that matters! :-) |
|
beth
|
Let him go, if he really loved you, he love you if you were 115 lbs. or 200 lbs. Maybe he is just using that as an excuse to get out of the relationship. Let him go--lose the weight--then find someone who accepts you for who you are. By the way, ask your doctor about phentermine---it helps with hunger---I'm taking it--it works! Good luck sweetie!!! |
|
NATIVE NEW YORKER
 |
YOU HAVE TWO CHILDREN WITH THIS GUY AND HE NEVER MARRIED YOU.............HE MAY BE A ''LOSER''
BUT YOU'RE A BIGGER ONE AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HOW MUCH YOU WEIGH. YOU TAKE TOO MUCH C-R-A-P FROM HIM |
|
smallpenislongtongue
|
i gaurantee he's hittin something else on the side. your problem is, if you don't lose the weight not only will he quit doin you but noone else is going to want to either. if you have to eat, the least you can do is purge |
|
George R
 |
If you lose weight do it for yourself not him. Otherwise you will just gain it back because he'll more than likely leave you any way. Since he is shallow enough to threaten to leave you over your weight he will find another excuse.
In some states living together for eight years constitutes common law marriage. Perhaps you should check into your states laws and find out his legal responsibilities if he does leave. That would include child support and possibly alimony. |
|
shellie11985
|
I watched an episode of dr. phil similar to your question. the ladies husband was much like your boyfriend always putting her down making it hard for her to get motivated in such..basically dr phil told the guy to stop discouraging his wife and be more supportive. you should talk to your bf about his behavior, and tell him that his negativity is not helping you, and that you are depressed because of the way he act..if you are interested in loosing weight you should talk to a dr to see what the best plan of action for you would be. But dont do it cause it will make him happy do it to make yourself happy..and if you have already told him how he makes you feel and he still has not changed then maybe others are right in saying you should consider moving on.
good luck with everything |
|
Gretta
|
Leave him! You have many more values! How you look doesn't define who you are... don't let him decide your value. You are a mother--- how many stretch marks has he got? |
|
I Seek
|
Tell him that you really need to hear WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT from him so that it would be EASIER for you to try to lose the weight in order to please him and in order to be healthier. |
|
sesame
 |
should you lose the weight to save the relationship?? NO. lose the weight to save yourself. start today, while youre losing weight, looking better, feeling better, for yourself, for the future, self esteem boosted, you might save the relationship in the process. what will be will be.
if a man thinks in his mind, rightly or wrongly so, that "no man will have her", the man himself wouldnt think he's got something worth holding on to. but if you all go out and men are checking you out and youre doing your thing, looking all fly and smiling and gorgeous, of course, he'd want to lay claim on you. please girl, take care of yourself, for today, tomorrow and the future.
if he's going, keep yourself trim and healthy. if he stays, keep yourself trim and healthy. do it for you! life is good. life is fun. life is to be enjoyed. snap out of your depression and enjoy this thing called life!!! love ya! all the best. |
|
Sarah M
|
Well then drop him Honey! He is not the one for you if he makes you feel bad! As long as you feel good about you then that's all that matters!! |
|
msrodriguez
|
I am a plussize model . A man who is this shallow will do this to the next woman. It is not only your weight sometimes men use this as an exscuse to have an affair by dumping idiosyncrisies on you. He is doing a classic version of transferance it is when you transfer your own insecurities on the other person then combining them with a plan to tear you down so you will stay there thinking you can do no better. Tell him his insecurity is fat! Tell him you can do bad by yourself and pack your children and move. If you stay in that they will learn to stay and settle for the same disrespect. you are beautiful in your own way. Hes gonna miss you when he catches Hell on the other side of the fence. STand up and live. |
|
|
|
|
No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
Not English
