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My ex spouse continues to belittle me through text messages. Is this a form of harrassment?
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My ex spouse continues to belittle me through text messages. Is this a form of harrassment?

Can I legally file a complaint. I am trying to move on and his continual belittling is breaking me apart. It has been 2.6 years and he has my 15 year old. He uses him to get to me. I have had a few friends read my text messages and they are horrified. This man mentally and verbally abused me for 24 years of marriage and continues. I realize this is about him and his insecurity. He is a hurt little boy from his past, but through counseling my progress went off the charts. It isn't simple to just get "over it", especially when you have 3 boys involved. He can't even talk to me because he doesn't hear me. I feel completely helpless. When I have moved 20 steps forward somehow he intrudes in my life and now it is 10 steps backwards.


Harrassment YES!

Don't read them no matter how curious....it's only hurting YOU.

Yeah You Sea Me
Yep keep them make a police report and take them to the prosecutor they will either warn him to stop or press charges.

yes, keep copies, and file a complaint.

file a complaint.Just dont read them.

Get a restraining order, then it will be harassment and if he does it again he will go to jail

Rosie D

Nick T
It is emotional abuse so you could try and get a restraining order. That will keep him away.

if you tell him to stop and he continues to text you, it is legally considered harrassment and yes you can press harrassment charges againt him. save your texts. if he makes any of this belittling public, you can also file charges for libel, slander, or defamation of character.

I think you could probably get some kind of cease and desist order that he cannot send you any text messages unless they directly relate to the care of your children. I mean, you could get a restraining order but I think that's a bit extreme when you are not physically threatened.

file a legal complaint. this is serious, he might try to hurt your boys. u need to take affermative action toward this man

Lonnie P
You mean you really have to ask???

Yes, this is harrassment.
Block his number; get a restraining order; file a complaint; change your number.

Whatever it takes to get this moron out of your life.
Perhaps move cross-country.

Johnny B Good
Yes it is. Report it to you phone provider and they will go over the details with you.

I would say file a complaint yes.

Yes to your question. Texting is a form of communication regulated by Federal, State and local laws with regard to unlawful use. Call the police and contact your attorney, as well.
I feel for you. So sorry you are enduring this, but glad you are no longer married to him.

if u feel that he's brothering u and u don't like it report him. don't email him back or angthing. just do ur thing and every time u get 1 from him, copy it and report him. theses copyes might come in handy if u have 2 go 2 court.
so report him

It is harrasment. Save the messages as proof, and take them to your laywer, or even the police. Although you might be told to simply change your number. Good luck!

You could get a restraining order - then if he continues he'd go to jail.

Report it to the police, do not delete the messages, keep them for evidance to show as proof of what he is doing.

Al Coholic
Yes, you can. You can actually get a restraining order if you feel he threatens your safety then he wouldn't be able to contact you at all without fear of being arrested. Keep the messages though.

Can't you block the messages or get a different phone number? It seems that would be worth it. I don't think it would be difficult to get an order of protection against him.

I'd say it is.

If you're feeling threatened, you should definately get the authorities involved.

I wish you all of the best in this situation! Be strong!

you can deff bring that to the police maybe you can get a retarianing order from him if the harrassment continues.. i mean he must be very immature and idiotic to continue to harrass you after you are broken up

How do you propose to stop him. You can get a restraining order, all it will do is cause him to be arrested, he won't stop, and what will it do to your kids. My cell phone company has a way to filter out texts from an individual, but then how will you communicate about your child? He will only call and abuse you. It's a tough row to hoe. Good luck.

depends on what the texts say - you can either contact your divorce attorney and see about bringing contempt charges against him in family court - or file a police report and get a restraining order.

contempt could get you both mnitary compensation for harrassment AND the no contact order.

If I were you, I'd change my cell number and not give it to him. Let him only be able to contact you through your home phone - not the cell.

Contact your divorce lawyer. If he was any kind of lawyer at all, he would have inserted a clause in your divorce agreement that forbade this type of conduct; it would also have precluded him from making disparaging remarks about you to your children.

You must have a certain amount of contact with this man because he has your child with him, but you can have your divorce lawyer go before the court and get an order that forbids him to contact you about anything that does not concern your children's welfare. The court can also order him not to disparage you on threat of being jailed for contempt if he disregards the order.

Do NOT delete those messages; they are your only proof of his conduct. Show them to your attorney. If your phone can "synch" with a computer, he should download them and provide transcripts of them to the court; if it is not, he can show them to the judge to support your complaint.

There is no need for you to go through this torment. You have the power to stop it. Use it. You can also ask the court to make your ex pay for the costs involved since it is his conduct that has caused the situation to exist in the first place.

same the text messages and contact an attorny and press charges

¸.•*´`*♥ GODEZZ ♥*´`*•.¸
yes it is he can go to jail for it

call the cops

I know exactely what you are going threw. I have been going thru the same thing with my ex wife but they were text messages and voice mails on my cell phone. I'm not sure of your state you live but in Ohio they answer is YES if the messages are not related to the children. He is aloud to contact you for that reason and that is all. You can file a report with your local PD or any police dept. but you must have proof. You may contact them also for additional info. What I suggest is that you print the emails and keep them in a safe place and show them to the police officials. All they could do at first is make a report, they may suggest a restraining order against him and if he continues then he can be charged. I hope everything works out for you.

Nena S
I think others have already given you good advice; change your phone number, block it so he cannot reach you, call the police, inform your friends and family of his attitude and finally go to counseling.

The fact he STILL can "get to you" and make you feel bad is what you have to start working on ASAP.
Unless you go to therapy and confront the issues you have about your past and your marriage, they will always be there to haunt you- and this gives him power over you. So stop it...!

It won't be easy or pleasant, but you have to do it in order to re-claim this power he still has over you. Good luck!

wind champ
Yes it is harassment. You are old enough to take care of this. He does this, because you allow him too. Stand up to him and start pressing charges against him, that will get his attention. He then will try and retaliate, but you stand firm and fight. Be Strong and stop being a push over, you should be sick of that by now. He knows all the buttons to push so you need to change your ways.

Your story is just like my story. Save the messages. Do not read them. You will just become more upset. I had a cease and dissist/a restraining order/ and I blocked my phone through my cell phone company. He was still able to text me via a computer to my cell phone. Unbelievable. I have a very good lawyer, and it just depends on the judge as to how he will be punished. Generally, these guys get away with so much, even after a Doctor took pictures and documented my abuse. Even after my neighbor saw my nose bleeding and called 911 before I broke up with him several years ago. My attorney told me if he comes near me, call the police. Even with the best attorney, once again these guys, like Charlie Sheen, get away with harming women, Especailly men that have enough money to get a good lawyer to defend them. Just stay away from him, save the messages, do not read them, have a friend read them, save them. Get a good Family Law attorney, even if you have to go through a free legal service. You just never know what these men will do. My son was 16 at the time I filed for divorce, he is 19 now, and still listens to my ex husbands side of the story. He has been brainwashed by my abusive ex husband. This has been a nightmare for me. Protect yourself, make sure you have a lawyer since Restraining orders, Cease and Disists Orders and blocking your phone or changing your number almost never works with an abusive man. They will eventually reach you. Based on my own expierence. Make sure you take care of yourself, ,do not let him bring you down. Have a good support systems of friends/family.

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