My husband doesn't like me watching T.V. ?

DrkLashes

Next time he wants to get frisky, tell him you don't think that's going to enrich your mind....

J/k!!!!!

Nah seriously, let him know that you have other interests as well. Explain you may not be interested in everything he is to the same extent he does, but you respect what he chooses to do with his time - and he should do the same. Honestly, with all the self help books he encourages, I'm surprised he doesn't see how him being so controlling doesn't contribute much good to the relationship. He really needs to learn to relax- bettering yourself is great but being too stiff can make life miserable.

cyranothe2nd

Why does he need to "let you" watch TV? Why do you need his permission?
Look, people disagree on all kinds of things. Not every married couple is going to have the same interests. So, tell him to back off and let you relax and watch your programs.
Its not like you're forcing him to watch with you!

More troubling is the fact that he feels the need to control you and belittle the things you enjoy, like they aren't educational or high-brow enough! What's with that?!
As I said, I think the only thing you can do is have a conversation in which you put your foot down and tell him to drop it and leave you alone when you watch TV. Or maybe you should nag him incessantly while he reads his finance books...

tinyblondie23

Tell him he is not your daddy and you don't need him telling you that you can't watch tv..you are a grown woman and it is time you grow up and stand up for yourself!!

surlygurl

TV is not the real issue. What is? Control? Personal values? If there were some way you could sort out what is putting you at odds it could be easier both for each of you to understand where the other one is coming from on the TV watching, and also to accept your differences without one person trying to control the other.

The book "The Seven Principles for making Marriage Work" by John Gottman has some really useful ways of addressing the ongoing issues that cause frustration in marriage. Whoops! Sorry I am probably sounding just like your husband. But maybe both of you should consider reading it.

Marissa

If your husband is expecting you to indulge in his favorite pasttime, he should be willing to indulge in yours. I have the same problem with my husband (different hobbies) and found that once I agreed to do what he wanted, only if he would also do mine, he stopped pressuring me to take up his favorite hobby. :)

tersey562

Instead of sitting in front of the tv arguing about watching it, after dinner you need to pour a cup of tea or coffee for each of you and ask him to sit down at the kitchen table. Looking across the table at each other and making contact will increase your odds of him actually listening to you. You may also want to write down your thoughts on the matter of tv watching and your also need to be firm. You are a grown adult and can make these decisions on your own. You can tell him you appreciate that he loves to read and that he enriches his life in this way but that he can't force that upon you and you won't force him to watch tv. When you want to watch tv he could read in another room so it doesn't disturb him and you could make sure the volume is reasonable. Your husband is definitely being both controlling and unreasonable and if this behavior is not dealt with it could expand to other areas of your marriage, please keep an eye on it. Good luck and God Bless.

PharmNerd

The fact that you have to get permission to watch TV is unreasonable. You are his wife not his child. You need to stand up for yourself.

juda75

is he your husband or your father? Why does he have any say in regulating your tv viewing habits? I understand if you lay around on the couch morning noon and night and neglect yourself, your marriage or your home...otherwise he is extremely controlling and unreasonable and i'd simply tell him you are a grown woman and you'll enrich your mind how you see fit and to stop trying to push his education agenda on you.

John Timothy

The Tiny Blonde is right. Are you not an adult? Why would you let someone else order you around?

Lydia

Good for him! An hour is enough. You may just not realize how much you are really watching! He just wants the best for you.

Flying w/ scissors

I think I would tell hubby where to shove the book, your not a child, your his wife!!! If you want to watch T.V. then watch it. If he wants to read then he needs to read. Tell him his not your father... I hate control issues and this just chapped my azz... Good luck

Schwinn

You are not unreasonable. Your husband is unreasonable. Do you have other problems? Or is this the only thing he is controlling about?

If he likes self-help books, suggest His Needs/Her Needs by Willard Harley Jr. It might help.

lonewolf

Mommyof2, Hon, first off tell him this is America "the land of the free"! His ways are not your ways. Money is not your God cause that is a sin ! Well that is just a few !

Simply put your not a robot or his toy your his wife. What gives him the right to tell you what you can and cant do... i hate that S**t about people...everybody isnt exactly like him or think like him... i think its unreasonable that your asking for 1 hour watch what you want.

If you told him he couldnt do something would he.

American Beauty

Your husband has control issues. No doubt, you've been allowing him to control you for a long time. You need to stop doing this. You're a grown woman, not his child.

Beckie

Honey, RUN!! The man is a control freak!! Believe me, I was married to one. When you know that something as simple as watching TV is going to set off an arguement and you actually have to schedule in time for it, that's NEVER a good sign in a relationship.

Like I said, RUN. Find you someone who likes the same shows you do...

acmeraven

What is wrong with you? You are actually thinking about what your husband likes or dislikes? Stand up and be a woman!!! Who cares what he likes or dislikes, it is what makes you happy that counts. His job is to slave away for your comfort and happiness and keep the whining to a minimum so it doesn't bother your ears.

kurts99ford

Why is he so controlling? How long are you going to put up with that?

Don't argue just turn on the television and watch what you want, you are an adult! Tell him to leave the room if he wants to or tell him to leave the house if he wants!

shdwtalker2002

How about you just turn on the TV when you want to watch it without arguing? If he says anything, just ignore him and turn up the volume. Please don't back down on this issue, or you will teach him that he can control you.

phylobri

You should not have to ask him if you can watch tv. You are a grown woman and if you want to watch turn it on and do so. Tell him that if he doesn't want to watch to go do something else. Don't let anyone boss you around, even in that name of good intentions.

Lil_MissVal

O.k. this might work, have the TV on when he walks in the door while sitting on the couch holding a book. When he start arguing with you smile at him and remind him that you are a grown woman. Be direct when saying this...look him in his eyes and tell him you are going to watch T.V without any interruptions and go back to watching T.V. The least he can do is turn it off...if he does, and you have a t.v. in the bedroom, go and lock the door and watch t.v. in peace. Tell him that you won't interrupt him if you are in your room watching T.V and he is elsewhere reading a book. If still unreasonable buy him some books about being a good understanding husband, who knows how to leave his wife alone while watching T.V...good luck!

whitexsaucer

He's controlling, tell him that you are your own person and are capable of making your own decisions.

Cyn

HELLO! Your husband is not your father! You should tell him that you are a grown woman and you'll watch TV whenever you want. This is not the dark ages, men are not the king of the castle! A marriage is a partnership , an equal partnership.If he uses the old "I bring home the paycheck", remind him who washes, cooks, shops for groceries, cleans, irons, and looks after his needs. There should be no fight just do it. You don't need his permission.

Ben Jeepin

Start demanding that he does activities he has no interest in.

Switch

lol You are funny planning the fight around your tv schedule. Your husband should accept you the way you are and not try to change your hobby.
Telling him you cant read books because you have bad eyes..lol

*LuNa*

I have never heard of this.... but maybe he's jealous for you paying attention to the TV and not him... It's possible, my husband gets jealous when I'm on the phone for a long time and he says it's because he wants to spend that time with me so it could be just jealousy... Why don't you invite him to watch TV with you, or maybe a movie or something... Maybe he will end up liking it.

Mr. Ed

Be an adult and tell him what you need and knock off fighting. If you need to read books on finance/self help get them from the library.
If the noise bothers him get a headset for tv.

Samantha R

Like tha one gurl said, he aint your daddy and you can do what you want to do, tell him that, sh!t, You should be able to watch tha most t.v. as you want too, you are a grown adult. if you don't like to read then don't tell him to ki$$ your ***. Thats what i would do.

moco-frap

tell him 2 get over himself

BROKEN AND BEAUTFUL

sis thats controll and its not right if you wanted to watch t.v all day thats your bussinesss runnnnnn for your life

Nate

Actually I don't think its about the time you are watching TV, I think it has alot to do with what your watching. If you were watching something that was always inappropriate, i might say something also. I think that your husband just wants to connect with you and feels like the tv is a disstraction, what I find is weird is that most women relax by talking about their day and getting everything in the open, tv never helps just puts everything on the back burner for alittle bit. But just feel me out on 1 thing that I said and thats the what your watching, because I bet if you watched a mind enriching tv show he wouldn't say anything, in fact he would be able to sit down right next to you and watch it.

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