My husband thinks I'm cheating and I am not. what should I do?

I been married to my husband for three year now. I never cheated on him. My husband came back from Iraq a year ago. I been a house wife and a stay at home mom, when he was gone. But, now I started going back to school 4 months now. Since, I started school, My husband been accusing me of cheating. He began to check my car, clothes,& e-mails. He has been taking this too far that he had destroyed my stuff (clothes,etc.). He has been hurting me badly. He never lay his hands on me before. I fear him. I don't know what to do. Who do I go to? should I leave him? I need help!

DeeDeeD

You need to call a women' s shelter in your area. they have trained counselors who will talk to you for free. abuse is never ok and you shouldn't be putting up with it. Good luck

Chris

Why doesn't he trust your word? Seems like an obsessive case of insecure jealousy to me. I have to admit that I used to be jealous of my husband always checking out other women when we were out together. Got some useful info online (below) about this that helped me. You might be able to cure your husband of this obsession - probably worth a try.

bibus75

Nothing can ruin a relationship or marriage faster than jealously. Jealousy creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hate, fear. No one thinks clearly when jealous. Jealousy will often change to the non valiant abuse. Having a relationship with a jealous person is tough. The jealous person acts entrusting or unworthy. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, even repulsive. Jealousy comes about because of the insecurity of the jealous person and the jealousy may or may not have foundation. This person is afraid of hidden communication lines and will do anything to try to uncover them. Jealousy typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety that occur when a person believes a valued relationship is being threatened by a rival. Jealousy often contains a mixture of emotions such as anger, sadness, and disgust. I would suggest a consulting with Professional.

delicata411

If he is putting his hands on you then YES you need to leave. Some solders when they return from Iraq are never the same. They are messed up for life from the things they saw and did over there. If he is putting his hands on you, you need to take the kids and go. I know you love him, and its not going to be easy but it will be the best things for everyone. This is not to say that you cant ever get back together but he will need to get some serious help.

Sue B

Domestic Violence Shelters all over GO

lady_phoenix39

LEAVE.

He has his own problems, and you should not suffer for them.

I'd speak with a counselor or pastor on base and ask them to assist you with moving out....and I'd get a no-contact order....and if he isn't willing to get help with his issues, I'd divorce him.

ANYTIME he gets physical with you, CALL THE POLICE and FOLLOW THROUGH WITH CHARGES

amentofreedom

its called projection; he cheated and now he cant trust you

unsung hero

Perhaps you continuing your education has made him insecure. This happens alot with men when their women become more educated. This is pretty extreme though, and you are being hurt? You need to get the help of a counselor asap.

If he is hurting you physically that is wrong, and you need to let him know that you won't stand for it.

mel

you should ask him first why suddenly he were accusing you.Maybe he was the one who cheated on you.and he suddenly felt guilty and scared you might cheat on him too.You have too talk and prove your love to him.

Just Me

Get some counseling...He may be going through PTS. If he is still in the military, go see the chaplin. If not go the the VA clinic, they will be able to help also.

Jery E

prove him right by cheating on him with me.

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