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My husband won't give me the divorce even though he has a new girlfriend...?
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My husband won't give me the divorce even though he has a new girlfriend...?

I have asked a couple of questions on here within the last month and I want to thank you all for your advice. I am taking most of the advice and I am stating to feel. I haven't been harrassing my husband in the last four days, I haven't called or text'd him in. Trust me that's a long time for me. I told him on Monday that I want the divorce before he leaves the state and he tells me he is in no hurry to divorce yet. I'm not sure if it's because he wants to have fun for a while with his new mistress or if it's because he will be ordered to pay child support four our daughter since he is already paying for his other children he has with an ex wife. He is a master electrician and is self employed so he isn't honest when he goes to court about how much he makes a month. He tells me he's leaving the state for two months but I honestly think he's telling me that so he doesn't have to worry about running into me with his new woman or having to deal with me while he's in love..... I still find myself thinking about him throughout the day but it's getting easier to deal with, I have to remind myself that he is NOT THINKING about me and I shouldn't waste my time thinking about him. He hasn't called his daughter in almost three weeks now and she is starting to ask for him but he will not reach out to her. I've tried texting him last week and the week before to ask if he could take her overnight and he never replies. His new mistress has children and I'm sure he's taking them places with her...there I go again, thinking about what HE'S doing...UGH! I am trying to stay busier lately and yesterday I found out my mother has an aneurysm and will need surgery soon. It feels like my world is just getting darker with all these bad things going on in my life, my husband leaving me and my mother having another aneurysm. (of course my mother is my priority) I have called my Pastor a few times to pray with me and now I feel like I'm bothering him even though I know he will always be there. When it rains it pours.... = (


i would not let him decide when to file for divorce, i would file first, ask for full custody, because if he gets shared parenting he won't have to pay u much in support. maybe he wants to wait until he can save enough money for an attorney and file on u first. also get him for abandonment. he;s just waiting to finalize his plans with her, meaning maybe he doesn't have the money saved yet. u can't undo the damage that's already done so u may as well file on him first, get the child support started and be rid of him.

He can't "give" you a divorce. If that's what you want, then just file it yourself and let him respond. He can't say no once it's been filed. He can ignore it - and then it will be a default. So whatever you say will be what's ordered by the court.

The only thing you might have an issue on is serving him - if he is leaving the state for 2 months. The sooner you catch him the better. File it yourself - there is a self help counter at your local court to help you with the papers.

He's not paying child support? Honey - get yourself a lawyer and petition for custody and a support order ASAP.

You don't have to be divorced to claim child support - it's payable as of the day he left the marriage.

And if you want to be divorced, file for divorce! Why are you waiting around for him? He's not in a rush - as long as there's no divorce action, he doesn't have to divide up your marital assets. He's got the best of all worlds right now; a new g/f to screw, no child support and all of his assets are intact! Take him down...

Since the advent of the "No-fault" divorce, it shouldn't matter if he "gives" you a divorce...file it on your own. His obligations are his issue and he has to meet those, just like you'd have to meet your own obligations...

♥♥ LINDA ♥♥
Wow I am surprised you didn't run when you found out he was married with children before you. He probably did the same thing to his first wife as he is doing to you now. Just go to the court and do it all yourself before he leaves. Then take this experience with you and not make the same mistake again.

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