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My husband works and won't help me with money for bills and just wastes it on his bad addictions what do i do?
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My husband works and won't help me with money for bills and just wastes it on his bad addictions what do i do?

i have confronted him about this and we just got married a year and 1/2 ago and we have been together for 6 years i don't know if to leave him and get a divorce or work things out we have been trying to work things out for a while now and every paycheck day is the same situation. i don't think i can take it anymore. please help me


XXXXXXXXXXXX I'd have to sabotage his wallet. This I would not take. Either he contribute or get kicked to the curb. XXXXXX

Leave, and find someone who will treat you better.

Queen Mother
leave him or deal with it. Yall are married, he needs to understand your grounds of marriage and respect them. you've forgotten yourself what marriage means to you because you've allowed him to make you unhappy. this is a situation that can be dealt with and should be dealt with. or you can move out and pay your own bills and let him live his life as well. just some suggestions that i would take, not telling you to do so. remember though, we all deserve someone to love us and treat us according to our will as long as its reasonable. don't sell yourself short baby! Good Luck!

your husband has an addiction and will never think of anyone but himself until he gets clean. sorry to hear all this, but it would probably be better if you left him alone for awhile, let him get straight, (and if he doesn't, don't take him back) see where he stands in a couple months, hopefully this will be a wake up call for him, and he will appreciate all you have done for him. and i am sorry if he does not do the right thing, it will however, eventually catch up with him. if you are not happy after 6mos. file for a divorce.


Big Daddy M
I am going to get straight to the point with this for you, and it may not be what you want to hear. What is happening here is he can do what ever he wants, because you let him. What I mean by that is, every paycheck he wastes, and what do you do about it? I can only guess there is a bit of arguing about it. Than it is over. It is obvious to me he doesn't care for you. If he really cared about you & your feelings, he would not waste his paycheck. You two are married he has responsabilities, and if he can't grow up you should move on. If you continue down this road letting him waste every paycheck on his addiction, you will never be happy, he will because he has full controll over you. So the best advice I have is if he can't understand he is married now and money should be spent on decisions that both of you make together, than you need to divorce him and find a man who will respect you.


teresa d
try counseling see if he will go with you if that doesn't work try talking with your pastor or minister at your church if nothing comes from that separate and tell him when he decides that family and their well being are more important you will consider coming back home

I totally agree with Big Daddy M.

Why did you marry this guy?

kosova 123
divorce him find someone who will appreciate you

christopher s
Trash him. He's just abusing you without putting his fist in your face with velocity and force.

Get to an Alanon meeting in your area. You will find what you need there.

Give him a choice...inpatient treatment for his addictions(30days).If he refuses then his second choice is to pack his bags and leave..treatment can work, but if he dosent do it now it will be too late for your relationship...The only way you two will ever work it out is by him recovering from his addictions.

No offense but your avatar picture looks like a guy to me. I'm going to back off from this one.

go ahead and file for the big D - it's probably not gonna get any better

Get a good lawyer and dump the idiot. If you haven't ironed out this problem in six months, let alone six years, you won't!!!
When will women understand that you can not marry a man and them change them.


Its a worldwide problem. Leave him some money for his addictions and take enough from him to pay his share of bills. If he won't agree to it, get a new husband.

Why did you marry him knowing that he's been this way for the past 6 years. Then you marry him, and he's not changing the way
he is spending his paycheck. Well I think that you should have dumped him ever since you knew about how he handles his money. Being married means that what is his is yours and what is your is also his, you share the income together. And well he must see things differently and you should not have to deal with that at all. Leave his *** girl.You deserve much better.

One word......... LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!

tell him to kick in 4 the bills or get out

First of all I will say I had one of those,I don't any more, Mine was different, He was an alcoholic. If the guy is useing money for gambling or drinking he isen't worth the up hill climb. Other wise I will tell you what I did, I went out and got a job. I have my own money and I can buy what I need or what is nessasary for the house. It's much better for you and the hubby.

LEAVE!!! LEAVE!!!!! Discuss the problem ONE LAST time. if the problem persist next payday hit the door and don't look back. It takes a rude AWAKENING to bring change. As long as you STAY and keep Complaining NOTHING WILL CHANGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

its time to leave,a marrige is a team effort, you both need to help each other not a one way deal.he is only thinking of himself, so now its time for you to worry about you.

Get rid of him and hook it up with me.

Robert A
run kittie run. 18 months is long enough to alter himself. it may hurt, but you will be able to look yourself in the mirror.

Well how long has he been irresponsible??
The whole six years or just recently?
I would say counseling but if he doesn't want to cooperate I would separate and let him pay his own way for a while maybe that will snap him out of his addictiveness Good luck

Celeste A
You have stuck by him too long. Why did you ever get married to such a loser? You cannot change him sweetie, only he can do it and he's not likely to want to do it unless he's made uncomfortable. As long as you stand by him and provide for him, not only material things but your company as well, he's got it too good.

Don't walk, run and get yourself a real man.

get rid of him

cindy s
Unless you want to be in this same sad place in another year and a half, LEAVE!!!!!!!! MY word what are you thinking is going to change?

I would walk and since you made no mention of children. I would truly walk. If he is not helping you now. Well he won't help with kids either.

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