My parents are fighting allot and i think its because of me, help?

I am 16 and a junior in high school this year my parents have been fighting allot and I think its because of me. And well I have depression and adhd and Epilepsy (Which I was diagnosed with in the begging of the year). And well two weeks after I was diagnosed I got really really depressed and stuff. And I became suicidal and was having allot of bad thoughts one night and so I went and told my parents, and they had me admitted into a pysh hospital. And well last week I forgot my Meds for everything and I called my mom and no answer and so I guess she was at work or something. But thank god I did not have a sez and well when I got home my mom was supper mad at me and grounded me. And well I had a baseball game that night and I over threw nick at first base and ummm I got really mad and threw my cap down and like jumped up and down. And my parents were mad and had a long talk with me. But I could not help it I could not control myself I was feeling so irritable and agitated and on edge. And well when we got home I went and got my shower and went to bed but then I heard all this yelling and screaming from my parents room and I went and listened in and they were saying how because I have all of these things wrong with me and why I had to be cursed with stuff and how I am tearing the two of them apart and stuff and how they cant protect me and give me the child hood I deserve and stuff. And now I feel like total crap and I just I don’t know what to do I feel like I am destroying my family. Advise?

loca_liisa

Your parents love you and I am sure they are hurt that you are sick. They want you to be healthy and live a healthy life. And you can. You and your family need to be educated on your illnesses and get family counceling. Sit down with them and tell them you heard them argue and mention you and you do not want your family to break up or fight. Tell them you want family councelling to help cope and deal with these issues. It has to be very hard for you I am sure. It would be for anyone and you are not alone. There are other people who have the same condition as you do and there is help out there for families in need.

Your mother and father do not understand or know how to really deal with this, nor do you. So to talk with someone, to have a third person help and educate and guide you all is what you need. Reach out to your parents and let them know how you feel. Let them know that being placed into a psychiatric hospital was not fun and it is not what you feel you need. There are other places much nicer that can help you and still treat you as a human being. You need to make sure you take all your medications. You can't be neglagent of that. You need them to help you cope with what is wrong with you. Try to be positive if you can. I know you can turn this situation around.Good luck to you.

Cheerfreak!!

You dont really have good parents if that is how they are treating their child!!! Siriously, thats not how you treat them if they have depression. Maybe you could talk to them, idk cause i'm not you. But tell then that it is hurting your feelings. :( I'm really sorry, i wish i could help more!!! If they dont listen to you and just get mad, they're not doing very well at being parents!!
Good luck!!! :/

Marlana

Your mother and father are a couple who were once in love and had all of their time and energy spent on each other. When a child is born, they make room to expend the energy on another person. This is almost always out of love, and unconditional.

I am not a parent, but I have been in relationships with men who have children, and when some things arise that need attention to the child, it will disrupt the happy life the couple once knew.

Believe that your parents do love you, and your troubles are something they look at as solving so that you can be happy. If something necessary happens, like you break your leg and have to go to the hospital it is not anyone's fault, and things need to be done to help each other to get on with life.

I think what is happening is that you may be giving them some unnecessary stress with your actions. If you feel unhappy and have thoughts of suicide, your parents will no doubt feel helpless. They don't know how to solve these problems on their own. At one time, a scraped knee, a bottle before bed, and losing a tooth were all things parents knew how to deal with because they expect it. No parent expects their child, the person they love the most--to be so unhappy and depressed.

Your parents are working hard at two relationships: the one with you, and the one with each other. When all of their energy is focused on you, as a couple, they are leaving no room for each other to support.

Families need to work together to help resolve problems. At 16, you are becoming a young man with the ability to start making choices and have the ability to react to situations that can reflect how your parents raised you. It is partly your responsibility to put that to the test by not blaming yourself or your parents.

It sounds to me like yes, you need some help from doctors, and mediation and therapy is a good step. But this isn't about you being to blame for your parents being unhappy. Your parents are doing everything in their power to make sure nothing horrible happens to you. With that said, are you creating issues that are unnecessary? Only you will know the answer to that. Are you doing anything to help them help you?

If your parents have no time for each other to talk, support each other, they may not be happy together at this time because they are expending so much energy on an issue they might find unfamiliar to them, and helpless because they don't know how to solve the problem.

Why don't you help them a little bit? Research your illness, take responsibility and make sure your medication is always near you, talk to them about what bothers you. Know that nothing is 'wrong with you', it's just how the situation is being handled right now, and no one is making good choices on how to handle them. Once everyone can work together, your parents will very likely find happiness again toward each other, which in the end, you might find will help you also.

eldots53

Sweetie, it's not your fault. They are just frustrated and feeling kind of guilty, because they can't fix all your problems and make everything better - and they don't really know how to handle it. Parents think they should be able to make problems go away, but they can't. They need to adjust, and adjust their expectations of you and of themselves, and remember the beloved child inside you. Please don't blame yourself. You have enough on your plate right now. I hope that you are getting some counseling. And maybe you can have some meds at school, so that if you forget them, you have a backup plan. Maybe your doctors can cooperate with that.

Your folks should be getting some help for themselves, because they are not being supportive of one another - they need some assistance. Tell them, in some quiet moment, that you overheard them fighting, and that it made you feel bad, because you did not ask to be this way. And tell them that you love them, and that you wish THEY would get some counseling and assistance to support themselves.

I thought my kids were just ADD and depressed. Turned out they were bipolar. The right diagnosis & treatment made a huge difference in their lives. Just remember that you are somewhat at the mercy of getting a proper diagnosis - just saying. Good luck, honey. Don't lose hope!

Jade M

You are not destroying your family. Just work on being the best that you can be. When you have a bad day, just remember that tomorrow is a new day and start over. Don't ever be afraid to tell your parents when you need help.

I have a son, who has OCD. He has also had issues with depression and mood swings. He suffered a great deal, and our family suffered right along with him. It's hard to watch the ones you love suffer and not know how to help them. That's what your parents are dealing with right now. They hurt when you hurt. Parents feel that is their job to protect their kids and give them a happy life, but sometimes things happen that are beyond their control. It is a stressful situation but they will figure out how to handle it.

I would try talking to your parents about this. Knowing how you are feeling right now may help them to figure things out a little sooner. There are support groups available for families in situations like this maybe that would be helpful for your family. It was helpful for me.

Penguin

You can't really do anything its not your fault persay
I mean it is your fault but it was out of your control
the only thing you can do is hope they do not get a divorce what are you gonna do in 2 years when you have to live on your own?
if they get a divorce it will just get you ready for the real world
what ever happens don't panic and blame yourself
just ask them both if they plan on getting a divorce
if they say yes
over 80% of American kids have divorced parents its no big deal
don't worry you will be fine
besides
you get twice the birthday presents and Christmas presents

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: