My wife to be told me she had a 4 some few years ago,now i just think shes a ****.?

T Time

If you can't get over it, do both of you a favor and break off the engagement. You don't want to live in resentment the rest of your life, do you? And I'm sure she doesn't want that negative energy for the rest of hers, either.

Judy L

For some guys this would be a turn on..............those are the guys I like!

georgia

i'm sure it's a pretty tough thing to think about, but look at it this way. almost all men fantasize about being in an orgy with a number of girls, and any guy that succeeds in doing it is proud of himself and idolized by his friends - at least for a while. why is it a double standard? your fiancee did what many many people fantasize about, doesn't make it right, but doesn't make her a bad person or a s***, any more than guys are s***s for the wild things they did in their youth.
agreed?
*hugs* and good luck. don't lose her over this. you aren't perfect, are you?

Rich N

If this happened before you met, I would say that you have a lot of growing up to do. People's history is not important, it's how they are now.

A foursome between consenting adults is not sick. Consent and age are the real social taboos.

What happened has helped to make her the person that you love now. Don't forget that. You should also be happy that she feels comfortable to talk to you about this.

However, if these acts happened during your relationship, get rid.

MANC & PROUD

Leave the past in the past as long as she hasn't cheated on you then that's ok.I think your shocked and your ego may be bruised she might of wanted to tell you because she wanted to be honest before you get married.Get over it and don't let it spoil your future together.If you carry on and get married you should bury it and not bring it up.

GrnApl

yes, because you weren't with her. Give her credit for being completely honest with you . If you can't handle that then your marriage is doomed at the start. Communication is a key element to a successful relationship. I think your jealousy is running amuck. I take it you are still a virgin right?

MC Hammer Daddy

i feel bad for you, she is a s1ut. Incidentally was it one in the mouth, one in the f@nny and one in the @rse?

zuvea

she must have a reasons why shes telling you about her past. probably she didn't want to get married or if shes is telling you the truth about her pasts, then forget about her cos once you are married to her this are the issues that will come out once u have an argument with her, believes me!!

just_me_1955

if you are that insulted by her past then you better make tracks pal cause you wont last like a snowball in hell with her!!!!!

sscott12414

So if you were the one that had the four some then what? Would you be the ****? If it is something that happened once and she is sorry and says it won't happen again the why not try. If not then you should leave. About the protection thing have you always used protection with everyone you were with?

predator

Why has she told you this? Maybe she has an ulterior motive for it, perhaps she doesn't want to get married.

ladylisaoflansing

I detect a note of jealousy! It's not childish, just selfish in a grownup sort of way.

If everyone was a consenting adult, then where's the crime? Is she more of a **** if the lights were on at the time? Less of a **** if it was dark in the room? More of a **** if there were three men than if there were two, or just one? How about if they were four women together, is that ****ty or is that hot in your humble opinion? Are you completely innocent of ever having fantasies about being in that very situation yourself?

Sorry to be so hard on you, but I strongly suggest you get your morality ducks in a row before you have a go at her for this one.

natalie.waterson@btinternet.com

no but your wife is!!!!! a leopard never changes its spots.She will do that again and again....Get yourself another lady who has respect for you and herself.....

Anjanette A

I think you are being childish but at the same time your wife is stupid. There is such a thing as TMI and she should have used some discrestion. Now if you brought the topic up and she was answering your questions honestly then its your fault you know these things now not hers. Dont' ever ask a question you dont' want the answer too.

Scalawag-101

Were you married to each other at the time? Was it 2 guys & 2 girls - or 3 guys & your wife? Was she drinking heavily?

If you really canâ€™t get over it then youâ€™ll have to do something about ending the marriage but give it time & donâ€™t act to soon. You might ask yourself: if you had the opportunity to have a 4 some might you do it? Be honest w/yourself.

Good Luck.

Sandy F

Well i guess you are a lucky man.. do you think maybe she told you this to get out of you wanting to marry her? think about it she told you before you were married to give you a chance to not marry her. other wise you would be hearing about it later and getting a divorce.. she knew it would bother you.. but she told you anyway.. people do weird things when they are going out.. as for the not protection while messing around with them go in and get your self checked for aids and the like stuff. and make sure that you are clean .. and if you can't deal with it dump her.

Felidae

Don't envy you this one. Rationally - it was "years ago," but emotionally it's kinda hard to take.

You're either going to have to get over this - and this make take some space from her - or not. Try and get your head around it, talk to her again and then make a call.

And don't let her make you think that it's not a big issue. Rightly or wrongly it is and can potentially affect the relationship. She will have to help you through this.

country_girl

well,no you are'nt being childish at all,not everyone can like the idea of being involved in such activities and relationships....i suggest do not go ahead with her if you truly are not comfortable and if her past is just not acceptable to you,cos it will just worsen things and will end up bad,so its better to end now rather than after marriage!!good luck!!

blondie

yea you are grow up!!!Whats in her past is in her past and nothing can change that.So what ever she has done when she wasnt with you is none of your bussiness really!You say you love her okay let it go.Good luck

bluebell

why has she chosen now to tell you, was it before she met you, you are not being childish and you obviously look at her differently now, tell her how this information has made you feel, does she want out of the marriage, is that why she has told you, so that you would finish things, talk to her, good luck

ceecee_41004

I think she is being honest with you cause you guys are about to get married and she wants to "come clean". If you can't get over this, then you probably never will. Just move on with your life, but you also have to look at it this way. Her past is what made her the person she is today. And you loved her very much before you found this out, so why let it bother you now.You can't hold her past against her.

REBECCA B

if you love her then you will forgive her if you dont walk away. look at it this way she done it so now its out of her system maybe she taught it would turn you on and has never done it. either way go get your self tested for hiv etc

scott j

If you love her work it out and dont live in the past

DKlyde

If you can't put it behind you you need to leave.

kobie65

No you are not childish.she does seem to be pretty loose and maybe you need to take a serious look at your relationship.

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