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Texan
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Might as well get a lawyer. Separation almost always ends in divorce. |
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mixemup
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sounds like she would like to try someone else out, and if it doesn't work with him, go back to you. Sorry, but that's probably the case. |
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NOIZE
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If you do that ...then what is the point of the marriage? You are supposed to work things out together. Seperating will only show you how to work things out apart from eachother. |
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copswife
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try counseling together and separately |
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rita_alabama
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The time apart might be good for you, and it might help you both decide whether the marriage is worth saving. But, from what I've seen, most people who separate generally wind up getting divorced, anyways. Have you both tried marriage counseling? It might be worht a shot.
I'm sorry you are going through this and I wish you the best of luck. |
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winds_of_justice
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No, it sounds like she wants to save the relationship. That's a very good sign actually, at least she's willing to try and salvage a relationship that she evidently sees as it being in jeopardy. I hope it works out for the best :) a lot of women would probably of just left. |
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lilac b
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Gino, take the six months off. It will give you both a chance to back off, collect your thoughts and evaluate the relationship and see if it is salvagable.
There should be terms. If this is about seeing where the relationship is headed, then there should not be any kind of seeing other people. And so that the connection isn't completely severed, you should make dates to see each other atleast once a week to discuss where you are mentally....and stuff like that.
I know that sometimes when you are in th middle of something and you get no time or distance from that person, you may be mixed up on the inside. Sometimes a little quiet time and space can help you get it all in perspective. |
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rudytute
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Sounds fair to me. You can send her over to Rudy's House of Love for 6 months of conditioning. She may not want to go back though. |
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lance t
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sounds like she just wants to go sow her oats, if you know what I mean. |
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shannon
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no, you cannot put a time limit on seperation- you either seperate and then realize how in love you are- or you dont realize it- there is no time limit- why do women always do that? it's silly |
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sfss50
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It sounds like your wife is trying to relieve her guilt for wanting out of the marriage by saying she wants a separation. She wants to see if the grass is greener on the otherside and keep you waiting in the wings. If she's serious about working on issues than I suggest you both go to a marriage counselor. She can't have it both ways and step all over your feelings while she's trying to figure out what it is she wants. Noone ever said being married is easy and you just don't run when things aren't going your way. If you truly love one another the counselor will help open those lines of communication between the two of you. If she's not willing to work at the marriage than it's probably over and there is only one option. Divorce and move on. |
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madtyga2002
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no it doesn't sound kosher. You all need to start dating each other again. Do things that you use to do that made you fall in love with each other. Those are the important things right now. Go out to dinner and a movie, go out for a night on the town. Put a card in her car just b/c or write I love you on the bathroom mirror with her lipstick. Its up to you to keep this relationship alive, you both have to work at it. |
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DKlyde
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Do not leave your home. She wants you out so that she can file for divorce with you out of the house. If she wants to seperate let her leave.
See a good divorce lawyer by yourself for some practical advice on how to protect youself and your assets.
Luck |
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BadAssJarhead
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Look I just got out of a seven month relationship were we had a bit of time for seperation on more then one occation. I can not proven it with pics. and what not I knew her well enough to know she cheated on me three times. is that somethin you are willin to go through? not sayin she will I am sayin it's a possability. She is askin for 6 MONTHS. I'd tell her if she leaves it's over with and that you're filein for a divorce cause you don't need the stress and everything else that comes along with it my friend. I am giveing you my personal experiance. I just went through this not long ago. and I always got lies from her about this and that and she seemed to think she didn't ever have to be held accountable to the relationship. however it is your marriage not mine. |
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tina*21
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I would talk to your wife and really find out why she wants to seperate. If she talks to you and tells you what is bothering you and you can try to change whatever she doesn't like there is no need to seperate. Everyone has issues in marriage and doesn't get a long for a time but you just work thru it. I would consider counseling and then after that doesn't work consider or think about it. Separation and divorce should be a last resort. Marriage takes hard work if you want it to work. Divorce and Seperation is easy. If you want a good marriage you gotta work for it. Good luck. |
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Ralley
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are you going to be in counseling together during this 6 months? If not, it's not a good idea if you want your marriage to work.
Good luck!
I wonder, although it's not my business, do YOU want to separate from your wife? Have you two discussed your issues (not getting along) and searched for solutions or is it just "easier" to separate. These are all things you should think a lot about...if you aren't already.
Let me know if I can be of any help! |
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Poetess_4U
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Dont do it!! You can't "seperate" every time you have marriage issues. You are suppose to stay together and work it out. Good Luck!! |
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snddupree
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No, it sounds like a cop out. You two should seek marriage counseling from a professional or your pastor/priest/rabbi and go to counseling together. More than likely this is a maturity issue if no children are involved. If she won't go to counseling than you go and work on your issues. You don't say how long you have been married but I would bet under 5 years and you are in your 20s. Life changes as you grow together and sometimes it isn't pleasant but you BOTH signed on for the long run. There is NO REASON you can't seek counseling. . . nothing shameful in that and it WILL probably save you marriage. Being apart will NOT save it. |
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dukalink6000
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Why six months? And what needs to get worked out? |
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kitcat
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Sounds like she wants time to play around and then maybe after that time she will want you. If it's over now, it will be the same in 6 months. Seek legal advice and then move on from there. |
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Fleur de Lis
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Do it. Sometimes distance make you realize how good you have it. |
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VIANNEY
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It seems that she does not want to be with you anymore.
Ask her for the divorce so you can go on your own . |
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Angel
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If she wants to go then let her. It happened to me and boy did it have consequences, but believe me it is so very important to let someone do what they "think" they need to do and do it with good grace. You just don't know what is around the corner. Maybe absence will make her grow fonder of you. Maybe you will agree will make her think, but don't hang on to something that is not working. |
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lisapj
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We (My husband and I) actually got divorced for a year dated other people and when we realized that we could work things out went back together. I dont know if it will work for you, we were fighting a lot and seperating did us both good. |
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ready4change
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As a wife of 24 years who recently seperated, I understand where your wife is coming from. After two and a half years of counseling and constant fighting, I could no longer take the stress of day to day living. The only solution I could see was living in seperate houses. I moved into a small apartment as I could not afford the house we were in alone, and did not want to depend on him financially. The whole point of the move, was to give us some time and space apart so maybe we could quit fighting about every litle thing and really work on the problems we have. It has been six weeks and things are still about the same with us, although my stress level has decreased greatly. I do still love him, but not in the way I should love a husband. I am hoping that time and work on the relationship will lead us back together. Divorce is a scary and permanant option. I have two grown children and they are having a hard time dealing with this as well. Whoever said divorce was easy has not contemplated it. It is a difficult and emotional time of life. There can be many reasons why your wife is wanting this. I don't think it automatically means she is looking elsewhere. Maybe she just wants some time to collect her thoughts and decide what she wants. Maybe she is hoping the whole absence makes the heart grow fonder will be true. If you love your wife and want to make it work, you might consider this option. Good luck to you. It is not fun or easy and you will feel you are on a roller coaster at times. |
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ken j
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u r done finito save her the trouble and divorce her she is play ing games move on |
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mJc
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If you are continually making each other miserable then it sounds ok to me. However, you must make sure you've covered the details of the separation (who goes, who stays; how are finances handled, are you free to seek out another relationship during the split, etc. etc.). I'm hoping there are no children involved. You should also seek out counseling during this period of time. |
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Alexa
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Relationships take so much more work than we can ever imagine but nothing can ever be worked through if apart. What if ya'll trying seeing a therapist individually to talk about your problems and learn about yourselves? You may be surprised to learn that your fights could stem from a childhood insecurity, etc. that could have nothing at all to do with one another. Then you can learn to manage those issues together and work through your problems. This option may be less devisive. |
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lexyten
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It may not be a bad idea. Make sure you have all of the ground rules set first, like whether or not you will be seeing other people. I don't suggest this, but it's your marriage not mine. I personally would not allow it. However, it is something that needs to be discussed. Too many times people have their issues, divorce and then remarry... what a waste of money! A divorce can run you each several thousands of dollars. Whatever you decide to do, good luck and I hope it all works out. |
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petlover
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Separation almost always ends in divorce. It sounds like she really doesn't want to try and make your marriage work anymore. It takes two people to make a marriage. |
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Mizz B
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In my own experience... id say sounds a lil dodgy! But im going on ex's i guess when ur married things are a bit different. |
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