My wife won't love me unless I lose weight?

LnM

I am also 5'8" and weigh 175 lbs, and I don't think I am fat. Although I have a big built and my waist is 33, I still don't think you are overweight. I think your wife is using your weight gain as an excuse for your marriage problems. Talk to her and see what else is wrong with her, your weight is prob just one thing bothering her but not all. It seems like she doesn't even want to go to counseling, its like she's almost given up. I would also be concerned with infidelity issues, alot of times women use things like this when they are cheating on their husband. You really need to find out what is really going on in her head. If you want to get fit, first you have to do it for yourself not for others. I am sorry if some of the things I have said hurts you, but I am just giving you my opinion. Also I wish you had provided a little more info like your wife's physical appearance, recent habits or so on. Good luck!

Mean Carleen

You have a 34 inch waist and she wants you to lose weight? I think you should lose her.

spelling nazi

Oh my God! That is NOT big!!!! My son is 5'10" and weighs 210 pounds and I'm not about to get rid of him!!!

Your wife has her priorities screwed up. I would think after 15 years of marriage she should have matured a little by now. I say lose 130 pounds (or whatever she weighs) by getting rid of HER.

Anthony F

If the dimensions you gave us are correct, I don't see how on earth you weight could be any less. I would tell her to go.

bose

your wife won't love you if you loose weight either! cos she doesn't really love you.

sweetness

i am sorry, but i am a woman and i aÂ´t least know how we think and operate, any other excuse does not cut it, you loosing weight is just an excuse furthermore your measurements are ok, it doesnt seem you are obese??? she wants it out! she wants a divorce and there is nothing you can do about it :-( women are more sensitive and its so hard at times to say things we know will hurt someone we have cared for at some point. that is a hash ultimutum but its got NOTHING to do with your weight!!! you can loose it all today but then she will find something else to complain about or ultimutum you with.......when you love, you simply love no matter how huge your sÂ´pouse has become. im sure she has also changed alot physically in those 15 years youve been married but you are not threatening or giving her ultimutums about that are you?? she might have found and fallen for someone else out there........but trust me, my gut tells me it has nothing to do with your weight!!!! where did the unconditional love go when she said " i do"??? ask yourself that. sorry but good luck :-)

ndnqt1966

She is being extremely shallow. You have only a 34 inch waist? And weigh only 169 lbs? What does she want you to look like? The cartoon guy on tv whose cartoon wife can't lose weight and he weighs close to zero? I honestly think she is unhappy in the marriage and your weight has nothing to do with it.....it is only an excuse. Perhaps counseling will determine the root of her unhappiness.

Gemini

I think she has the problem,she should love you through THICK or thin.Tell her if thats how she feel then buh bye

Star

ask her does she want a HUSBAND or a skinny husband, if she chooses skinny she never loved you for who you are in the first place, divorce her

littleviv2000

My hubby is 5'8" and he had a 34" waist(don't know what it is now, he just re-joined the Army and has lost weight), and I never thought he was big. Your wife is a superficial b*tch who probably isn't the same size/weight she was when you guys got married. You are barely overweight(according to BMI calculator, you are just 5lbs overweight), and if you are happy and healthy, tell your wife to shove it, you don't need to be treated like that, especially if you aren't treating her the same way. Would you care if she gained a bit of weight and was only a few pounds over what would be considered overweight for her height? If she is willing to leave you for something like this, I don't think losing weight will fix the problem. She is just trying to find an excuse and figures(and is counting on) that busting on you about your weight won't work, won't make you lose the weight, and she can then just walk out because she told you to do it and you didn't. Let her, do you really need this from her?

Keith Python

So God forbid you should get sick. You should lose weight for your self-esteem and your health; not for her. If she doesn't love you after 15 years because you are a little overweight then you are better off without her.

doctorlickie_69

Dump her and go get some p*ssy. Lots of women are there for the taking so have some fun and get laid.

M R

She is got major problems. 1st of all your weight is not that much, your not even close to fat. She is externalizing her problems, blaming you wrongly.

Maybe you can lose 5 lbs. that'd be OK for you... but it won't help whatever is going on with your wife. She is WAY out of line. You go to counseling if she won't - it'd be better than nothing.

Good luck

I39

My husband is your height but weighs a few pounds more. I have no problem with his size whatsoever. I think he's perfect. Your wife needs to grow up.

elvlayarvvi fEisty wife and mom

your weight is just fine! no need to lose any! she, is the one w/ the problem, not you! for better or worse was the vow, and she is about to break it, sigh! Geez... I was just looking at my husband's little belly last night...it's so cute, lol! He probably is the same height and weight as you...I guess I have been feeding him well, lol! =) Just stay the way you are... if she don't like it, too bad... in 10 years, she will gain, too... then what, hmmm??? good grief... she has been reading too much about fat Americans, huh, sigh... show her this... Lady! accept your husband as he is! or cut down on the butter you cook with! Buy low fat milk for him...don't make him lose weight...why don't you just buy food that's better for him??? My God, some people now a days...sigh! They think their spouses should look like models on TV or Movie Stars! fooey on that...

deb a

i have to agree with mean carleen apparently she does not truly love you lose her

flavagirl

Sounds to me that she is just looking for an excuse.The way you describe your self you don't need to lose weight.She's the one that has the problem.I wouldn't worry about it.Her loss!!!!!

Rein

My husband is 5'8 and he weighs more than you do...he is muscular and very hot to me. I don't know why your wife wants a bean pole......are you certain that this is the problem and that she wasn't just saying this because she was made and wanted to "twist your head"?

kkeelstylist

well buddy, get down on it!!! My brother who was 270 lbs doesn't want to diet, so his doctor put him on "metabowise" it's been about 3 months and he's lost 90lbs so far, he can eat what he wants, but of course not so much of it and NO sodas at all, and he walks 1 mile a day,it's just melting off, remember "less in, more out" Listen just do it for your self, but, your wife should love you unconditionally, everyone wants some one who takes care of themselves, or at least try!!

Liz

How much does your wife weigh? Just think, you could lose all that weight in one go, just by showing her the door.
Seriously, mate, are you honestly telling me you need to be with someone who would resort to that sort of emotional blackmail, just to exercise control over your every bite of food?

Wolfen

Common you know that love doesn't feel the way you are feeling. She is the one with the problem, I suggest that you focus on yourself for awhile get out of the house do what you like to do find some way to begin to like yourself again cause honestly if she wants to leave good riddence. What a shallow b*****!!!

Lionheart Â®

She's nuts. She wants to get rid of you and will use any excuse to do so.

sexylilthang

I think you should leave her! She should love you unconditionally!

Pam

is she some kind of supermodel or something to judge you??

....

what thats crazy your not even a fat,15 years is a long marrige mabey she using that as an excuse...you should love someone for whats inside mabey if you where an absolute heffer lump i could understands where she coming from but your not!

hope it goes alright :)

Lyndsey B

Well, it sounds like she may have control issues which she is focusing on your weight. Does she have issues with her own weight at all, a history of body image disorders, or obsessive compulsive disorder?

You are definitely on the right track with suggesting counselling. But if you cannot convince her to go, I think what you need to do is get advice for yourself on how to deal with the situation.

Certainly don't give in to her pressurising you to lose weight. In the short term, this may keep her happy, but ultimately this will just encourage her obessive behaviour to escalate and if she already has a wharped perception of your weight, don't expect it to suddenly change. Think of this as her having anorexia, but instead of her focusing on her own weight, she is focusing on yours. Just tell her you are not prepared to lose weight as you don't feel you need to and that she has a problem that if she doesn't address is going to destroy your relationship. Be firm with her, let her know you are not prepared to give in to her demands.

sword_maker_samurai

your wife has serious mental problems, you have the same if you listen to her.

Jako

hi,
To know your ideal weight , check this equation -> [( your height (in cm) - 150)*3/4 + 50 ] the result is your ideal weight in kgs , so if you are overweight and you want to reach your ideal weight there's a site i know of , http://overweight-doc.co.nr/ , they offer a program to lose 9 lbs. every 11 days. This program proved to be very useful as it's one of the healthiest programs ever to lose weight. well go there and see for yourself. and i hope it helps.

can answer by reflecting on my experience my hubby gained nearly 2 stones but my love for him didn't alter - he was still the same man i married and loved, the personality remained the same. He lost the weight because he chose to. Equally i gained weight after I had the kids and haven't been able to loose about a stone so in theory my hubby should leave me because any arguments we have must be because of that extra stone I have gained.

Your wife is really shallow-sorry but that's the bottom line. Stay as you are if you are happy with your weight and she has to deal with it. good luck.

Beatngu

Shes not going to be happy no matter how much you weigh. Besides, why would you want to stay with someone that will only love you if you look the way they feel you should look. As far as how you look now, I would say a 34 inch waist probably looks good! I know my husband is 6' 3" and he wears a 36 and he looks damn good!

flagger

I'm assuming her breasts have not sagged YET.

Sounds like she is more interested in the vessel than the contents. She needs to get over that attitude.

My answer to that is, what are you going to do for me when I do that?
It usually comes with no response. It is all about her afterall.

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